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Saturday, January 10, 2009

I Wanna Be The Biggest Loser


OK, I'll admit it. I'm addicted to the show The Biggest Loser. I love to watch these people transform from severely over weight, to near PERFECT figures. Gives me hope for myself I guess. I mean, if they can loose 150 pounds, I should be able to loose 20 right???

WRONG!

I am finding it so utterly impossible to shed these 20 pounds (I'd even be happy with 10) that I feel like I want to quit trying! I feel like the ability to do it on my own is just not there. If you noticed from my previous post, I didn't even bother with any New Years resolutions. No promises of weight loss and exercises, because I'm tired... TIRED of letting myself down!

I've tried to eat only when hungry. I've tried to count calories, cut carbs, count points, exercise away the pounds (and I LOVE to exercise... I know, I'm weird). I've tried other nameless not so healthy methods. I've tried the emotional route, the give it over to God route. I still have nothin'.

Then it dawned on me. I need to join the biggest loser! I can see it now.

Biggest Loser Music plays as I come on screen....
Here is Karlie, a stay at home mom to four who can't get her jeans buttoned. I'll be wearing the horrible little sports bra ensemble when they take me up in front of the world to weigh me. As I step on the scale it will beep and then as the crowd gasps, it will go to a commercial break.

After you have watched adds about Special K and Britta water filters, I'll be back on screen, 1/2 naked with a small roll of fat hanging over my overly tight spandex shorts. That bratty little blond chick will look at me with pity and say "Karlie, at 5'6, you weigh 156 pounds. You are officially the most mentally messed up contestant we have ever had on the Biggest Loser."


At this point I will cry (like they all do) and say "never again, will I be this way."

Then I will go on to weeks of 1200 calorie diets, and 8 hours of exercise per day ( I learned that little tid bit in People.)

Then after the show is over, I'll come back on the finale. I'll have a new wardrobe, and a new hair style (all courtesy of TV of course) and a spray on tan. I'll be some obnoxious size (like zero) and have professionally whitened teeth.

My kids might freak out, because I don't look like their mom anymore, but it would all be worth it right?

OK, OK, I don't REALLY want all THAT. I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. I just don't want to feel fat anymore. I know part of the problem is my own brain.... but I really do see great value in health. Yet I just can't seem to make it happen.

Anyone with me on this?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

i love your motivation;-)

DO IT!!

Halfmoon Girl said...

I hear you on this one. I am not fat, but have never lost the 20 lbs I kept on after my last. I know I don't look that big, but I don't fit anything of mine properly and want to be where I was in order to do the things I like to do. I like to be physically active, and still am, but not as much as I was. The biggest place I have fallen off the band wagon is my eating. I have never been a calorie counter/dieter, but I used to eat less carbs, sugar, etc. I have been feeling generally sluggish and unwell for a while, so I am into day 2 of trying to get rid of some of my internal toxins from abusing my body with lack of sleep, sugar, etc. It is not a harsh one- I can still eat fully, just not certain things. It is for 12 days- I will see what happens. I am not expecting amazing weight loss- it has more to do with how tired I have been. I hope to have more energy and to get the meds out of my system from a recent procedure. There is a long winded comment from me to answer your question. sorry.
ps- i think you are gorgeous, Karlie!

Halfmoon Girl said...

Hey, I came back to say that cleansing can be controversial if used for weight loss- like I said, that wasn't my main reason for doing it. I did talk to a trusted professional first, and if you are interested, I will let you know how it goes. If I stick to it, I will be done on the 20th.

EEEEMommy said...

I am so with you! :)
I was really feeling okay with myself, and excited even to be able to buy the next smaller size of jeans (bonus that it was Jan. 2nd! which means I didn't gain weight over the holidays)...who cares if they're a size 8 and not a 4? I didn't...until my 9 year old announced, "When I grow up, I hope I'm skinny like Mrs. H" (a fried at church). Oh, so Mrs. H is skinny? How do you think I compare to Mrs. H? I stupidly ask. "You're fatter mom." You think I'm fat? "Yes, you're fat.....but I still love you!" It did wonders for my self-esteem I'm telling you! Sigh!

javamamma said...

I'm with ya. I actually seem to have much more luck when my hubby's not around. What's with that? Eating habits, exercising - all good this past week.

But if I have a choice to be 10 pounds pudgy with my hubby or sleek and trim without him. I choose him! ;) If I could have both - that's my first choice. Jesus, give grace!

Gombojav Tribe said...

My daughter and I watch the Biggest Loser together (usually snacking on cookies or something...I know...I know....) and we place a bet on either who will be voted off or which team will win the challenge. Our bets are things like the loser has to make the winner a sandwich or come her hair, etc. It's our Tuesday night game.

Now, **I** might be the most mentally messed up viewer they've ever had!