ConservaChick

Is anyone still out there???

2010-08-25T17:03:00.000-07:00

It has been FOREVER since I last logged on to my blog. I have been contemplating writing on it again because facebook seems to be too... public. Blogs have a little more anonamiaty, which is nice when not everyone likes your opinions!Anyway, just checking to see who still blogs. Maybe I'll post something in a day or two.

2009-04-22T07:54:00.000-07:00

I am taking a writing class in school right now. I'm writing essay after essay. Analytical, persuasive, personal... honestly it has taken the joy out of blogging. It makes it feel like homework. Once my writing class is over, I'll be back (and hopefully a better writer). See ya this summer!!!!!!! ~Karlie

Foolish in Who's Eyes?

2009-03-19T12:42:00.000-07:00

It seems like I never get on here anymore, unless I have something to gripe about. So can you guess why I'm writing today? Yup, gripe fest.

So, here is the deal.....

My 13 year old daughter wants to be home schooled next year. At first I thought, "no way", UNTIL she gave me her reasons why. It is her last year of middle school and while she is eager to attend high school, she would like one more year to learn all the things she feels she can only learn at home. She wants one more year to focus on learning without the distractions of "teen drama". She wants to learn to cook better, balance a check book, pour over scriptures. One last year, just her and her mom, before the crazy high school years begin. I think she knows the clock is ticking towards her adulthood.

So how, HOW? can I deny a request like this? I mean, I've always been open to the idea of homeschooling again, if God leads, so I figured if after prayer, if I felt God's go ahead, I would plan to keep Zoe home next year.

So, now for the frustration part. I told my mother about this plan, and she all but flipped out on me. She treated me like I was foolish for even considering this. Zoe is doing very well in school, and I am back in school myself. Basically the conversation went like this. "Oh, you are not REALLY going to do this are you? finally when you start to make something of yourself... you go and do this."

Can I for the record state that this comment hurt me more deeply than I thought possible?

I have never been one to care about a career. I've always loved being a mother and wife. I'm not kidding, I pity those who are in a career and leave young children at home. But to have your own mother confess after all these years that she was disappointed in your choices... it hurts.

She went on to tell me how smart and mature my kids are, then mumbled something about good genes. Good genes? NO... GOD! My kids are good because we put GOD first in our family, and did what he told us to when it came to raising our children.

I still plan to go to school, regardless of what we decide for next year. Online courses make that quite possible, but my youngest will be in middle school when I graduate, what if God calls me to home school him? I guess I'll look like a fool, put the job on hold and OBEY!

Its hard to not live to please people. I so badly want my mothers approval, but I'd rather let her down than God.

If putting my God and my family first make me a looser in this world.... so be it.

Contemplating Consumerism...

2009-02-20T09:06:00.000-08:00

My closets are full of clothes I seldom wear. My shelves are lined with books I will only read once. My fridge is so crammed with food, that expired sour cream and wilted lettuce is bound to create useless waste. Toys flow over creative (and expensive) storage units that grace my children's rooms in Pottery Barnesque style. Video games, movies, shoes, makeup, coffee mugs, curriculum... endless seas of home school curriculum, hot wheel cars, Lego pieces, dolls, cat toys, dishes, floral arrangements, seasonal decorations, boxed up art, unused scrap booking supplies... or card making.. or quilting..., AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

How much money has been spent on useless crap???????

I'm not against my kids getting toys, or buying myself a cute pair of shoes, but as I look at the grotesque amount of "stuff" we have accumulated, I am ashamed.

Our little church has a $3500.00 deficit. You know, $3500 really isn't all that much, but to them, it is huge. When I look around my house and see the THOUSANDS of dollars we have spent on nothingness, it makes me sick. SICK. While I can't come up with $3500 to give our church, I have somehow found endless $$$ to fill my home with useless junk.

My priorities have been wrong.

Oh, but I did tithe. For years and years I tithed to a big church that spent the money on useless junk too. Fake plants, granite bathrooms, special speakers. My last church spent $100,000 on a fundraising "specialist" who came in and tried to guilt us out of MORE money. Why? So we could build a coffee shop! Oh, and more granite and $400 silk fica trees.

I've had the "give to our church and you will be blessed financially by God" speech shoved down my throat more times than I can stomach. It was all about greed. Greed of the church (sorry folks, but taking credit card payments from it's members to put granite in a bathroom IS greed). Greed of it's members. Yes, I'll give money to the church bathroom beautification fund because I want God to bless me with MORE STUFF!!!

What ever happened to giving to your church because you believe in it's purpose? Because your heart wants to see the word of God spread? Because you know they will use the money wisely to help the body of believers? What happened to giving just for the joy of giving?

You know what I think? I think they can shove the prosperity movement up their ....

Now I stand at the doors of a modest church, and I have nothing left to give. I strongly agree with the principles of sowing and reaping. I have sowed tithes of greed into a corrupt church. I have sowed my finances into consumerism. Now a true place of worship lays crumbling at my feet,
and I feel powerless to do anything about it.

What should we do? We planted seeds of greed, watered it with a love of money, and now we as a nation are harvesting our own nightmare. Where do we go from here?

I look at Acts 4:34-35 Neither was there any among them that lacked: for as many as were possessors of lands or houses sold them, and brought the prices of the things that were sold, And laid them down at the apostles' feet: and distribution was made unto every man according as he had need.

Is this how we will survive? Is this how my church will keep it's doors open? Who are the apostles? Who can we trust?

I am not hopeless. I sense that God can and WILL work in this situation. He is pulling the weeds out of my life as we speak, I imagine he is doing the same for much of the church. Maybe the church will emerge from this, ready to make an impact. A clear focus on Christ without ladies luncheons, super sound systems and sparkly bathrooms in the way.

25 Random Things about me

2009-02-10T10:54:00.000-08:00

I was tagged over at facebook, and I'm too lazy to write two different posts, so here are 25 Random Things about me (most you have already read during a previous tag)

1. Uh, I'm drawing a blank here. This may be harder than I thought.

2. I'm WAY too interested in Politics... it's just not healthy ( :

3. I almost always read non fiction, but have recently been reading "fluffy" novels. What's up with that????

4. I get excited by theology. I can't resist a good conversation about theology... or politics for that matter... or Thai food (see I'm well rounded).

5. I really, REALLY like to shop.

6. Right now I'm on a pilates kick. Sadly I'm also on a mozerella stick kick. Balance.

7. I'm not that worried about the economy because
1. I've got a great garden space in the back
2. I've got a really fat dog. Hey, don't knock it, they eat them in China.

8. OK, I'll admit it. I'm actually a "little" worried about the economy.

9. For the record, Obama is NOT the anti christ. Nancy Pelosi however..... : )

10. I 'm very sarcastic.

11. I'm actually pretty old fashioned. I like to bake my own bread, raise my own children, grow my own vegetables, order take out, buy new socks when I'm too lazy to find the matches... I'm a regualr pioneer woman!

12. I ADORE Hip Hop.

13. The best food on the planet is Indian or Thai. I'd choose Pad Thai or Matteer Paneer with Naan over meat and potatoes ANY DAY.

14. I don't like meat.

15. I do like cookies.

16. God and my family are the most important things to me.

17. Hiking and exploring is my favorite family hobby.

18. My heart's desire is to travel more. We are planning a trip to Greece, but it's 3 years out. Right now, even a weekend at the coast sounds nice.

19. I am not easily offended. It takes a lot to make me angry, but when I do get mad.... I am brilliant at getting even.

20. I pretty much like everyone. Although I'm not that fond of bikers, in there little tight shorts and funny helmets, riding at a leisurely 20 miles an hour in the center of my country roads... when I'm really late for an appointment.

21. The coolest professions: stay at home moms, farmers, authors, non corrupt pastors (there are a few), Sephoria sales girls, bankers, and Oreo cookie makers.

22. I'm going to learn to speak Spanish this summer! Mostly so I can understand what the Hispanic boys at the middleschool are saying about me. Maybe I'd rather NOT know.

23. I like exercise.

24. I'm very girly. Lip gloss, shoes, pink hearts, pretty dresses, jewelry.... cheap beer and toe nail biting.

25. Baseball makes me happy! I can't play worth a darn, and I think the guys on the church league team were secretly lobbying to get me removed, but I don't care. Once out of every hundred pitches, I hit the ball. It makes a little klank noise as the ball rolls a foot or two passed me and I run like crazy. My favorite team is the Royals, and they suck nearly as bad as I do, so it's all good!

Second Chances

2009-01-28T19:42:00.001-08:00

In high school I had a best friend who ended up taking a very different route in life than I. While I got married, had kids, went to church, she became addicted to Meth, had several children from different fathers, and made money in unthinkable ways.

We had not talked since high school, but I would hear stories of what had become of her. Several years back she called me. She was in a rehab center, and had been talking about the people who meant the most to her. She called me to tell me that person was me.

Even though I was a Christian at the time, I turned my back on her. I told her that her lifestyle wasn't something I could deal with and told her not to call me again. I had two little babies at home and one on the way, and I was afraid. Afraid to reach out.

For years I regretted that phone call. As God has convicted me over the years to not fear the lost but love them, she has come into my thoughts and prayers again and again. I've often prayed for a second chance. A second chance to love her as she is... as Christ would. To share with her a God that could wash away her sins... like he did mine.

Last night I thought of her again. For the first time, I decided to search for her on the Internet. Several hours later I came up with nothing. Again, I offered up a silent prayer for her.

Today my husband called me. Guess who called him today? YES! It was her! Through a very complicated web of events, she had ended up with his work number. It had NOTHING to do with my web search the night before... but EVERYTHING to do with GOD!

I called her the first free second I had. My first thought was of how rough she was. She talked like a hard woman. Only 32 years old, she sounded every bit of it and then some. She was raising three kids on her own, working several jobs to pay the bills, puffing an a cigarette as we spoke.

Our lives are worlds apart. I was almost embarrassed to share about my comfortable life. I have had it SO good. She... has not.

After several minutes of talking, she started to talk about her hobbies. She shared how she goes downtown to minister to the drug addicts on the streets. How 9 years ago (right after our phone call) her life changed when she met God. God delivered her from drug addiction, and now her mission in life is to see others delivered as well.

I sit here in awe. My ex drug addict friend is doing more for the kingdom of God right now than I ever DREAMED of doing. She is reaching people only she can reach. I can see her now, in the worst part of town, cigarette in hand proclaiming Gods love. THAT is beautiful to me. BEAUTIFUL.

LOOK AT WHAT OUR GOD CAN DO!!!!!!!!!

I asked for a second chance to save her, but clearly I didn't need one. GOD does the saving, with or without me. But God DID give me a second chance to love her.

...There is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven’t strayed away! Luke 15:7

I Wanna Be The Biggest Loser

2009-01-10T08:27:00.000-08:00

OK, I'll admit it. I'm addicted to the show The Biggest Loser. I love to watch these people transform from severely over weight, to near PERFECT figures. Gives me hope for myself I guess. I mean, if they can loose 150 pounds, I should be able to loose 20 right???

WRONG!

I am finding it so utterly impossible to shed these 20 pounds (I'd even be happy with 10) that I feel like I want to quit trying! I feel like the ability to do it on my own is just not there. If you noticed from my previous post, I didn't even bother with any New Years resolutions. No promises of weight loss and exercises, because I'm tired... TIRED of letting myself down!

I've tried to eat only when hungry. I've tried to count calories, cut carbs, count points, exercise away the pounds (and I LOVE to exercise... I know, I'm weird). I've tried other nameless not so healthy methods. I've tried the emotional route, the give it over to God route. I still have nothin'.

Then it dawned on me. I need to join the biggest loser! I can see it now.

Biggest Loser Music plays as I come on screen....
Here is Karlie, a stay at home mom to four who can't get her jeans buttoned. I'll be wearing the horrible little sports bra ensemble when they take me up in front of the world to weigh me. As I step on the scale it will beep and then as the crowd gasps, it will go to a commercial break.

After you have watched adds about Special K and Britta water filters, I'll be back on screen, 1/2 naked with a small roll of fat hanging over my overly tight spandex shorts. That bratty little blond chick will look at me with pity and say "Karlie, at 5'6, you weigh 156 pounds. You are officially the most mentally messed up contestant we have ever had on the Biggest Loser."

At this point I will cry (like they all do) and say "never again, will I be this way."

Then I will go on to weeks of 1200 calorie diets, and 8 hours of exercise per day ( I learned that little tid bit in People.)

Then after the show is over, I'll come back on the finale. I'll have a new wardrobe, and a new hair style (all courtesy of TV of course) and a spray on tan. I'll be some obnoxious size (like zero) and have professionally whitened teeth.

My kids might freak out, because I don't look like their mom anymore, but it would all be worth it right?

OK, OK, I don't REALLY want all THAT. I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. I just don't want to feel fat anymore. I know part of the problem is my own brain.... but I really do see great value in health. Yet I just can't seem to make it happen.

Anyone with me on this?

Ego Girl Wishes you all a Happy New year... and other gossip!

2009-01-07T20:00:00.000-08:00

I'm a few days late on my New Years post, but 2009 should be a year of may adventures for us!

The biggest change??? College. I'm going back. One of the best things about getting pregnant at 18, was that I didn't have a chance to rack up THOUSANDS of $$$ of college debt. Not having mega college loans to repay allowed me to stay home with my babies, home school (yes, I WAS qualified to teach them without a degree), and do all those other magnificent house-wifey things.

Now I look at my babies, all nearing birthdays that will make them 13, 11, 9, and 7. time is FLYING by. I've had to take a good look at what I want to do when they are gone, how will we help with THEIR college, etc. I looked at the fact they are still far to young for me to go into the work force and leave them to fend for themselves, but the time is coming... sigh.

I have been subbing occasionally at the kids school, and have fallen in love with teaching, especially the struggling kids. I've spent quite a bit of time helping the "special ed" kids. Who quite frankly are just kids with tough back grounds or different learning styles, who just need a bit of encouragement, and one on one time.

So, I looked at the possibility of a job in special education. Great benefits, summers and school holidays off. Hmm, sounded good. So I went to the college to find out about a loan. Ugh, the yucky debt part. Would you believe there is a shortage of special ed teachers, and the government will forgive 70% of your loan if you teach special ed for 5 years! Now THAT is an answer to prayer.

I start in March. All my classes fall within my kid's school hours, and I only have classes on Tuesday and Thursday, leaving three days to maintain my stay at home mommy status. In four years, I'll be 35. My youngest will be 11, and my oldest will be getting ready for college herself... GASP. Time is flying. FLYING I tell ya! Anyway, I may take a full time job as a teacher, but I'll still be home after school with my (it hurts to say it) teenagers, home for the summers, etc.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the best part... I have to take P.E. which means I am required to go to the gym 3xs a week to pass. Talk about motivation eh? Oh, and the membership is covered by financial aid. WOO HOO!

OK, so enough about the school thing (can you tell I'm insanely excited?).

My New Year's was awesome. My brother took us snowboarding. My hubby is a total natural... so are my boys. I however am not super skilled in that area. Still, It was crazy fun, and I'd do it again in a heart beat.

We ushered in the New year with several friends and a $90 bottle of French wine (that we DIDN'T buy). Spent the rest of the evening having WII battles (I am totally addicted to WII Fit).

On another note, we decided to become members of our little church. That is a huge step for us. Actually, I wanted to run a women's bible study, and was told that they would like us to be members first, so here we go. It seems so official! Really, if you knew how BIG this was for me and my husband (and our slight church phobia) you'd say "Good job on the commitment!"

Now for the bad and good news of 2009.

The bad news? Right after we decide we are finally ready for a commitment, our pastor says he's leaving. Going to Uganda to become a missionary. WHAT? I am totally happy for him, I really am. I can see God's hands all over this, but I did tell him that he'd better NOT be replaced by a fire and brimstone kinda guy... or a mega church man. "Cause I just committed to this church"! Grrr.

The good news?

My daughter came home angry the other day. When I asked her why, she replied, "because all the high school boys keep telling me how hot you are mom." Now I know... this is slightly disturbing on one level, but do you know how stinkin' good it feels? Hello ego! Seriously, I often feel like a fat old frumpy mom. This kinda thing will fuel my confidence for a year!!!! Gayle... I know you understand.

Did I confess that I am far too vain????

I have no grand resolutions to confess for 2009. No other big changes to report. So I'll end this post with...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!

The Reason We Orbit Around the Son

2008-12-28T20:55:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I start feeling down. The snow won't melt and I'm stuck in my house. The grocery bills keep getting higher. The holiday "goodies" have added a few pounds to the mid-section. These all sound like little things, but I can make them HUGE. Seriously, I can lose sleep over a few pounds (although I'm a bit mental that way).

I've been feeling pretty low, in the world that orbits around me. Being self centered has a tendency to do that. I've been ignoring God. I really don't know why. I just have been avoiding him.

Today at church I had a "moment". I was worshiping, and having a bad attitude about it, when a song caught me off guard. "We all fall down, we lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus." I'm not sure what happened. All I know is that the Holy Spirit hit me hard. I could feel it so physically, I was worried I'd have a Toronto moment, right there in my little conservative church!

My heart God's again... in just that moment. WOW!

The sermon was by some homegrown missionaries, serving in Uganda. I heard about little girls sold into prostitution at 8... for a bag of sugar. They told us how most men beat their wives, because that is how things are done, and how the "wives" can't ever escape because they have NO way to care for themselves and their children. We were told that they drink the same water that they defecate in, and dump their dead, and pour gasoline in, and then wonder why their babies die of ecoli. We heard how they lock away their handicap children. We learned that they don't have families... just many partners, and many children. They don't parent... they don't know how. Their lives are so incredibly void of God, that they have no morals, only fear and misery. Yet they are people just like us, with feelings, and sadness, and SO in need of a little hope... of a savior.... but they are afraid to know him. How very sad.

My world seems a little brighter right now. I am thankful for education, and toilets, and handicap rights. I'm thankful for clean water acts, and medicine, and families! I am thankful that my girls live in a country where they CAN provide for themselves if need be... where they can learn, and love, and be loved by their husbands.

We are so blessed that God is here. Here in America. This country WAS founded on Godly principles, and we are still reaping the results.

Today I saw what the Godless looked like, and it broke my heart.

A man centered world leads to despair.

God NEEDS to be the center.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

2008-12-23T23:45:00.000-08:00

In the busy last minute Christmas preparations, I found a moment in between batches of cookies and bread to hop on the computer and wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS! I love you all! ~Karlie

Church in Mayberry

2008-12-16T08:26:00.000-08:00

There is a thick layer of snow covering my driveway. My heater is chugging along, trying to keep my century old farm house above 60. The kids are off at school thanks to my husbands over priced 4 wheel drive truck (which I am currently grateful for). All the business that has kept me away from housework, projects, and blogging has suddenly ceased. I wouldn't dare take my little white chick car on the roads. I tried last year and ended up walking... 5 kids in tow... and a month of "I told you so's".

Another year of being trapped out in the middle of nowhere. However this year, I don't mind so much. I seem to have lost the ability to "slow down". So I am grateful for being stuck here "nowhere".

We have ended up at a little church by our kids school. The town feels like Mayberry. Quaint and pretty. Old Victorians and a general store. I could swear there is a time warp that has kept that place in the 50's. If you have read any of the Harmony books, you know my town.

It's hard to take a city girl and place her in a small town... it's even harder to place her in a small church where the music hasn't changed in 60 years, nor has the body.

It's a solid church. I think there are maybe 6 or 7 other families, a nice handful of kids, and dozens of elderly. The old ladies bake cookies every Sunday. Gossip is huge, but what else do you do in Mayberry? Anyway, they are SO happy we are there. A new family... UNDER 50. That's a big deal and BIG gossip. They think we are a model family. My husband has a good reputation in town. We dress well, behave well. Ugh, if only they could see my heart. I'm trying to step off that pedestal before I fall.

The pastor is great. His sermons range from brilliance to... weird. Last week he talked about the birth of Jesus, however, he was pretending to be Mary. In a thick accent he started talking about his privates hurting. Then as the labor progressed, he started moaning. I turned to my husband and said "if he starts pushing, I'm leaving". Luckily, he didn't go there.

Oh I hope it works. This church I mean. I don't think we could handle another huge upset. Not for along time. Seriously, if we find out they are sacrificing cats in the basement or something, were done. DONE! We are so fed up with church CRAP right now, I just pray that God has us somewhere safe. I truly feel our walk with the church is on it's final leg. I don't want to be another church casualty, where I say "Christian's killed my faith in church... but not God." Not that my faith should be in the church anyway.....

Moving on.

Angry

2008-11-30T19:53:00.000-08:00

I'm angry.

I have a CLOSE friend who's husband's lung collapsed. He has been in the emergency room for nearly a week. I just found out today.

My pastor's wife (another close friend) has had her kids, and been in prayer over the situation.

I'm not mad because no one told me about this... I am not mad because this was kept a "secret" from the congregation. I am mad at WHY this was kept a secret.

The pastor suggested that only a "select" few should know about this, because if EVERYONE knew, they might be inclined to pray. What's the problem with prayer? According to my pastor, those who do not know how to pray in "faith" could cause this man to die. If someone perchance prayed for God's will instead of demanding healing, it could ruin this man's chances of recovery.

I couldn't help but argue with this reasoning as my pastor's wife told me this over the phone. "Isn't God's grace big enough to cover those of us that don't pray the exact right words? Isn't our God sovereign enough to heal with the humble prayers of a New Christian? Isn't it damaging to the body to claim that their prayers might be hurtful?"

I don't know about you, but I believe God welcomes ALL communication. God can use ALL prayers and work them together for GOOD!

I guess what I'm really angry about, is my knack for always ending up in really screwed up churches, with wacked theology.

The Birds and The "Tadpoles"

2008-11-18T19:20:00.000-08:00

The dinner tables brings out all sorts of interesting conversations in our family. Tonight my 8 1/2 year old son told us (out of the blue) that in 10 years his friend R***** wanted to have sex with a woman. All of our mouths hit the floor. We excused my 6 year old (with the lure of video games) and asked our son if he knew what sex was. He said "nope, but I sure am curious".

Rather than have him get his information inaccurately at school, my husband called my son into the bedroom and said "it's time for us to have a little talk". So off they went... into the land of no return.

As I was clearing the table I could hear giggles and "OH GROSS" coming from the bedroom. After what seemed like a century my son emerged with a knowing look on his face. The first thing he did was holler at his brother "hey, G*** guess WHAT..." At that moment I realized that my husband had left out one of the MOST important parts of "The Talk" DON'T TELL OTHERS. I quickly pulled him aside and told him that he was to keep his new knowledge to himself. "OK mom, but I can't believe you and dad did that FOUR TIMES (we have 4 kids)!" Clearly he wasn't listening.

Moments later his older sisters walked in the room. My son turned to them with that same "knowing look" and before I could stop him yelled out "Guess what! In a few years I'll be able to shoot tadpoles out my wiener."

My husband is now banned from giving the sex talks.

Death Of The "Church Lady"... The REAL Get Revival!

2008-11-13T21:19:00.000-08:00

I know the idea of fellowship and bible study should sound appealing, but last night I would have sold my favorite (make me look skinny) jeans to not have to go. I dreaded the prospect of sitting in a room listening to one particular person rant on and on, while the rest of us stare aimlessly into nothing, offering up silent prayers of escape.

Is it a sin to pray that someone stops talking?

I so badly did NOT want to go, that I actually called and cancelled (due to a sick child... that was actually sick... a little).

Yet as the hour of the study approached, a deep sense of guilt came over me. This WAS a commitment, and darn it, I'd better tough it out.

I reluctantly hauled my lazy butt into my chick car, and began the 20 minute drive into town. I was in a foul mood so I thought some music might help. I listened to a Tim McGraw song about a guy killing his step father. Real God honoring stuff. Good song... bad choice when I was already having serious attitude.

I pulled up into the driveway of our associate pastor's house 10 minutes late and noticed that mine was the only car. "Hmm, maybe it's cancelled?" I thought eagerly to myself. I knocked on the front door then stepped inside to a room revealing the associate pastor and his wife, and one other woman who is new to our church. Usually the class is pulling in a dozen people or so, so I was surprised to see such a small turn out. Ah, but the talker wasn't there, so my mood brightened just enough for me to stay.

The 1st half of the study was ... slow. I started counting the chapters we had left, playing with my hair, daydreaming about the cookies I had back at the house.

Then it happened!

GOD BROKE THROUGH!

He took a stale bible study and brought life.

A simple question was asked and the "new girl" opened up and answered with such transparency, it opened doors to an evening of ministry and healing.

Now I'm a very open person, to have me speak my mind, feelings, or struggles is nothin' new. However this woman had a lot, and I mean A LOT bottled up, and wow, did God use her courage in a BIG WAY! Before you knew it the associate pastor and his wife were sharing their struggles and hurts. They were being vulnerable in a way that I seldom see pastors (or their wives) be. Ugh. If only pastors could see how much good it would do the congregation to let us see their "dark side". It's nice knowing that we are not the only ones who struggle.

A couple of months ago I was asked to give my testimony to the women of our church. I planned a big speech about how "bad" I used to be and how God has changed me. However, when I prayed over it, God told me that he wanted to to share how "bad" I still am. Not in a condemning sort of way, but in a "I'm still struggling, I still make mistakes, and God still loves me" kind of way. I also got to take a few jabs at the legalistic gals in their floral jumpers and worn out Old Testaments, and share about the "grey" areas of my life that were NOT sin, like Santa, Merlot, and Crunk. So fun.

After my testimony was shared, I had dozens of women coming up to me, calling me, etc sharing their own struggles, their own "secret" lives. Most of their stories were the same. A glass of wine on Friday, a "secret" viewing of Desperate Housewives, whatever. Almost all of them had things in their past that any "good Christian" would turn their noses up at. I thought if these women would just open up to each other, they'd see they were all hiding the same things.

Then there were confessions of the REAL sins. Anger, lust, revenge, gluttony, you name it. There again, so many shared so much in common, but never opened up enough to let anyone know it. One woman said because of her struggles she felt like an island. How sad... if only she knew.

Not until we stop trying so hard to hide who we are, can we really start to tackle our sin. Being fake is too exhausting. Deception is the breeding ground for sin. Hiding your personality is deception. End of story.

I could fill a months worth of posts with my "grey" areas, current sins and struggles, and past, but I'll spare y'all.

Ah, but I got to confess a little!

I.... like tattoos, I lack contentment, I'm a little vain (ouch, that one hurts), struggle with self control, and used to be able to shoot large amounts of tequila without flinching.

So I want to hear some truths! Common, it feels great! Tell me something you'd normally hide at church. Free your soul!

5 Things I Love

2008-11-11T19:36:00.001-08:00

My new blog friend Candy tagged me with this award. Thanks Candy!
Now I'm supposed to list 5 Things that I Love, and then TAG 5 more people when I'm done.

So...

5 Things I Love

1.Music

Music is like oxygen to me. I need it to function!

When I have music I can~
worship better
clean faster
run longer
love deeper

Lose myself

Music motivates me when nothing else can.

I've had my most amazing spiritual breakthroughs with it

It's mended many broken hearts

I've rocked my babies to sleep with it's lullabies

It's calmed my anger... Stirred my compassion

I'm not picky about the type.
It just depends on my mood.
When I want to dance I turn on jamiroquai,
Toby Mac, or Family Force 5

When I'm driving I like Hello Goodbye, My Chemical Romance, or Cold Play

When I'm running I listen to SuperChick, Gwen Stephanie, or Hawk Nelson

Here is a pic my daughter took at the Hawk Nelson concert last spring.

When I worship I like The Newsboys, Sara Groves, Hillsong

On a warm summer day I like Blue grass, Allison Kraus,The Grateful Dead.

There is no end to my moods... there is no end to my music collection!

I like it loud!

2. I love my husband in flannel shirts. This is just a weird quirk. !
I'm not usually into the lumberjack look, but I just can't resist him when he is dressed in fuzzy, plaid, flannel shirt

See... isn't this HOT! 0-:

3. Thai Food.
Can you say Tandoori Chicken Tiki Kabob? No really... try to say it. My husband and I LOVE to get away to the city... just the two of us.
When we do, we almost ALWAYS hit up one of our favorite Thai restaurants! My brother is a mountain climber ad leaves for Thailand next week, and while I'm envious of him experiencing the culture, the landscape, I'm REALLY jealous of his consumption of Pad Thai!

4. Being a part of my Family.
I know, I know, it sounds so "typical" but I really do think I have the coolest family on the planet! Both my husband and I have a similar sense of humor, and would you believe, my kids got it too? We are always laughing, and often at something no one else "gets".

Our dinner table is awesome. My kids can all hold their own in a conversation about
politics, theology, or Napoleon Dynamite! Silliness is encouraged in our home! Sometimes we will turn on music and ALL dance around the house until we fall down with exhaustion (and laughter). We love to hike together, make up stupid songs, and skip dinner in favor of milkshakes and a movie.

My husband and boys all love to fish (they are fly fishing this weekend). My girls and I love to shop together, give each other makeovers and curl up under the covers and watch "chick flicks" on the portable DVD player. We are spontaneous, and sometimes just hop in the car on a whim and drive to the coast, or go visit a ghost town, or explore a museum.

It's not just me immediate family either! I've got borderline insane relatives that I just adore. My mom is a genius and totally kooky. My brother is a Christian Hippie who looks like a 70's porn star (I've said it before... and his look still hasn't changed), my relatives are French chefs, musicians, doctors, slackers.. I think they are awesome! The eclectic tapestry of my family keeps it interesting!

We definitely have our share of faults, but as a whole, my close knit family is full of joy, faith, and adventure!

I just love... LOVE being a part of my family!

Here are the girls of the family minus My 2ND daughter. The 1st three lovely ladies are my aunts. The one up front in the purple in my beloved mother. Next in the blue is yours truly, then the beautiful girl in the yellow is my 1st born daughter.

Here all the boys in the family, minus my dad ~ who had escaped ( :
1st is my cousin, followed by my 1st born son. Then you have my brother, my husband, and the little guy upfront is the baby of the family (but I don't let him hear me say that).

Here I am (with no make up GASP) and my gorgeous daughter! Neither of us usually wear glasses, but she's on this big Sarah Palin kick, so hey... gotta go for the look, right?

5.Jackie-O
No, it's not about the politics... the girl's got style!

Hmm. Now as for tagging 5 people, I'm going to pick on Javamama, halfmoongirl,
Emily, andysbetty, and the 5th pick? YOU!

BTW, I can't figure out why my family pics are blurry. I messed around with them for over an hour, and I just can't seem to get them to submit! AHHH. Anyway, I'll try to get the in focus later 'cause right now my computer is definitely NOT one of the 5 things I love ):

In Reply To an Old Friend

2008-11-09T20:56:00.000-08:00

This post is a public reply to a comment left on my last post.

Elaine, since you publicly posted your personal letter to me on my blog (rather than an e-mail), I am assuming you want a public reply. If that is not what you intended, please tell me and I'd be happy to remove this post.

As a comment to my last post you wrote:

Maybe it is because the bitterness that has been building up. Is starting to show on the outside. Honestly Karly. You never respond to emails. Your last few blogs have become very bitter. I can feel your contempt for the human race (all of us) in your words.
If that is how you come across to your fellow town members, why on earth would they even want to deal with you?
Why do I even read your blogs? Because years ago, you were a very dear friend. I know, you just tolerated me. I'm not stupid. Yet I liked going to the womens groups with you and was even saved at the prayer group. Something I thought would never happen in my lifetime. That was HUGE to me.
Now, everytime I tried to set up a time to come visit, it was always something. You had moved away and didn't have to entertain my friendship any longer.
Bottom line, I was rejected.
Is that how you treat your fellow town members?
Still your friend
Elaine

OUCH! I sit here in awe of this comment. Contempt for the human race? Bitterness?

When one writes a blog it is hard to portray the correct tone. My heart was in no way bitter during my last few posts. My political posts are usually written either with sarcasm or a heart of great concern. I have strong beliefs that I will NOT apologize for. My opinionated nature is, and always has been a big part of who I am. With a title like Conservachick, one should expect this to be a political venting ground. I also don't share my blog with my community. With my husbands position, I have to keep quiet more than I'd like to. Posting serves as a "safe" place to share my thoughts.

As for my last post, the point was to honor my husband as MY hero! I wrote the post mostly for him and guess what... it made him feel loved, respected, and honored. Was I surprised that no one stopped? Yes. However I do not for one moment think it is because I am cruel or "bitter" towards them. People are busy. Chivalry is dying in this "me" focused culture of ours. That disappoints me.

Honestly Elaine. Men seldom open the doors any more, give up their seats, etc. I find this everywhere. Maybe there is an secret international "let's hate Karlie (because of her contempt for humanity) club", but I doubt it. My guess is that ANYONE would have been left standing there on the side of the road.

I am a sarcastic, political, strong willed person Elaine. You know that, but I LOVE the human race. That IS why I care so much. I definitely sin, have bad thoughts about others, whine, and yes... occasionally gossip. I am human. Still, my primary goal in life is to serve God, and that means to serve and love others. While I am tempted to go into the things God has me doing to reach out and love those around me, I feel it would be wrong. My good works are not of my own doing, but of God alone. Still, please know that while I often stumble, my greatest desire is to serve.

Now Elaine, I feel I must apologize for not keeping in better touch with you. My lack of correspondence is in no way a rejection of you. I have not seen one, not ONE of my Washington friends since I have moved. I'm lousy at Christmas cards, even my own relatives get irritated by my lack of response to e-mails. I still love my old friends (you included), I just get overwhelmed with 4 kids, a social husband, church, work, volunteering, and quite honestly, the people God has placed on my heart right here in my very own town. Even blogging (the ONLY way I keep in touch with old friends) often takes a back seat to my busy life, which is why I often go months at a time without posting. With all of my excuses, I still feel terrible that I have not been better about keeping in touch. So Elaine, I AM sorry.

On a last note Elaine, I never just tolerated you. Your friendship was always very real to me. As I have moved around I would often tell people of an old friend I have who is the most loyal person I have ever met. I was talking about YOU. We may be very different from each other, but I always found beauty in you unique personality! And hey, we also had many things in common, like vegetarian food, motherhood, music and art! While our friendship has entered a different season, I have not stopped caring about you.

Elaine, your salvation was very precious to me. I pray that even though I can't be there to watch you grow in your walk with God, you continue to seek his voice and know his love. I am sorry I can't be who you want me to be, but people will always let you down. Our Father however will never reject you, never ignore you, never let you down. NEVER!

With love, Karlie

Chivalry IS Dead...Well Almost

2008-11-08T06:39:00.000-08:00

I know, the title of the post is so cliche', yet when I needed a Knight in Armor to help me as I was stranded on the side of the road with a flat yesterday. Not a single one arrived.
I was SHOCKED! Here is why:

1. I was stranded on the side of the highway that connects the two "small" towns that we live between. Hundreds of vehicles passed me.

2. I was there for over an hour, fumbling with a car jack, looking quite clueless.

3. I look VERY girly. I'm not one of those tough looking girls that could use power tools or something. I wear dresses and make up and am sadly not at all buff. One of my best friends IS however one of those buff power tool kinda girls, and she WOULD have stopped.

4. I was driving a little white chick car (my husbands words not mine).

5. Here is the big one... Dozens of cars that drove by KNEW ME. Anyone that knows me could easily guess, I don't know how to change a tire (or even know where to find my car jack). They could have guessed that I was on my way to pick my kids up at school (as I was only 2 miles away from it and the school day was about to end).

Not ONE person stopped to see if I needed help. Not one offer of a phone call. Nothing. I actually had several people stop me later and ask how the car troubles went (because they saw me stranded on the road). "Fine, no thanks to you!" Didn't actually say it, but I thought it REALLY hard.

Now I can't change a tire, but I'd like to think if I saw a woman on the side of the road, I'd at least stop and ask if I could call someone. I HAVE stopped before for an elderly couple, and my husband stops for EVERYONE!

My mother raised both me AND my brother to think of others in need. To this day I am still amazed by the way my brother will reach out to help a stranger. So I guess I foolishly have the same standards for others.

This entire experience brings back memories of our last flat tire several years ago. We were on the way to my mom's house for the weekend and traveling along the Washington State freeways. We had 4 kids and a cat in our mini van. The tire blew and we ended up on the side of the freeway trying to put on a spare. Again no one stopped. Nearly an hour passed as the cars zoomed by, and all I could think was "people suck". Then finally a small pick up truck with an old Asian man pulled up behind us. My heart swelled. I thought to myself, "so this is what a TRUE hero looks like"! As he got out of his truck, he turned away from our vehicle unzipped his pants and peed. Yup, you heard me right. HE PEED! Then he hopped back in his truck and drove away. I can't even share my thought with y'all on this one. I'm trying to keep my blog rated PG-13 here.

Now we get to the "Well Almost" part of the title. Someone did come to my rescue. Someone called the school, got my kids, picked me up, replaced my flat, AND bought me cold meds (I forgot to mention I was quite sick during this whole ordeal). The REAL hero of this story is my husband.

So, while it may seem that Chivalry is dead, there ARE a few knights in shinning armor still out there (or maybe knights in business suits wearing Tommy Bahama cologne). Oh and yes, he DID change my tire in his suit!

I know my husband, and he didn't only come to my rescue because I'm his wife, that's just what he does. Like I mentioned earlier, he stops for EVERYONE. I can't tell you how many times we have been late because he stopped by the side of the road to help a commuter in need. I LOVE that about him. In a world with so few willing to take the time... I married one of the last true heroes!

Deception

2008-11-06T08:14:00.000-08:00

Well, I'm sure y'all could have guessed that "Conservachick" is not all that happy about the way the elections turned out. I wasn't surprised, but that didn't take the sting out of it.

I guess I'll fess us and admit I cried. Not as much because Obama won and McCain lost, but because of the Christians that voted for him.

Numerous Christian friends and family members hopped on the Obama band wagon, seeking.... Change? Comfort? Just going along with the crowd? I do not know. No one can give me a "real" answer.

What really bothers me about this is the state our church is in. If so many members of our body can so easily gloss over the fact this man stands AGAINST God, against scripture and Christian values and still vote for him, what a sad state we are in.

The guy is charismatic and polished and makes big promises he can't back up. If Obama can so easily deceive so many of our own, how are we going to fare when the Antichrist comes? NO, I am not in anyway implying that Obama is the Antichrist, but I think there are some very good lessons (and warnings) about deception here.

The Bible says:

'for many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah.’ They will deceive many' Matthew 24:5

'Beware of false prophets which come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly they are ravening wolves.’ Matthew 7:15

This scares me. People that I love are turning away from God in favor of "false prophets". Where is the church headed?

Mass Market Messiah

2008-10-29T20:38:00.000-07:00

He is:
The Hannah Montana of politics. A media produced phenomenon, all polished and pretty and ready to sell to thousands of adoring consumerist, television brainwashed fans.

The Happy meal toy used to lure you in... but all you end up getting is processed food.

Is anyone else bothered by the fact he has children's books out? Or that there is a 24/7 Obama TV station? Or that tonight during prime time, every channel had an Obama "special".

Does anyone else wonder what is funding such extravagances?

My father has been a Republican all of his life. Now he is a drunk. All he does is drink and watch TV. The TV has convinced him we need change. Now he is voting for Obama. I ask him "Dad? What is Obama going to change?" I get blank stares. He doesn't know.... he's just another victim of the media. It preys on people who can't think for themselves. There is a lot of them out there.

I know many Christians who are voting for Obama. Why? Because they don't like the way our country is right now. They are concerned about the economy. They blame George Bush. Yeah, because it's all his fault that we became a greedy over consuming nation. He forced us to take out loans we could not afford.... right? Sorry America... we can't blame Bush.... It's OUR fault.

Obama is NOT the Messiah. He will not save us. He's NOT going to fix the economy. Have you guys ever studied Marxism? Who wants to live with no aspirations? Marxism is only good for the lazy, or the ones on top. Socialism? How did that work out for the Soviet Union? I mean really. People are so worked up by all of this media hype, they can't even see what they are getting themselves into.

He has become our Golden Calf. our culture's Idol.

Idol
*a representation or symbol of an object of worship ; a false god
*an object of extreme devotion
*a false conception : fallacy

Do you remember God's response to their idol worship? Now leave me alone so my fierce anger can blaze against them, and I will destroy them... Exodus 32:10

WAKE UP AMERICA!

I'm not even going to get into Obama's voting record (he's the most liberal voting record in senate). Won't even touch on his pro-abortion agenda. Won't talk about his anti-American church, or his attendance in Muslim school.

I will make this statement... if you are a Christian and vote for Obama, you ARE voting against Christian values.

Yes. A vote for Obama IS a vote for change. Just remember, things CAN change for the worse.

The Wrong Path

2008-10-27T21:14:00.000-07:00

This last week I have come to a disturbing realization.

I am not on God's path.

I don't know where I stepped off it.

Heck, I don't even know where it is any more.

Not only am I on the "wrong" path, but I am going down it fast.

So fast that it's only now that I'm realizing I don't know my way back.

My kids feel it.

I feel it.

My husband feels it, but I'm not sure he cares.

I care.

I'm scared...

That even if I find my way back....

I'll have to go it alone.

I'm scared...

That I am totally utterly clueless, and always will be.

I'm scared...

That I will never find my way back.... because I'm too far gone.

Detox and Nibbles

2008-10-21T08:53:00.000-07:00

I'm on day 5 of sugar detox, and still plugging along. No, I have had not ONE bite of sugar or refined flour. YEAH!
I even went to a dinner party on Saturday with homemade truffles. I almost broke, especially because it was a "lobster and shell fish party" (I know, I should like it, but I start to stare at the stuff and begin to wonder what type of it's innards I'm eating, or if I'm eating the head or the butt and I just can't) so, I was STARVING!
Yup, it sucks, BUT I am feeling SO much better. SO SO SO SO SO much better. I did go a little psycho on unsweetened banana chips this morning, but hey, it could have been worse.

On another totally off the subject note, my son informed me yesterday after wrestling with his brother that his "nibble" hurt. I asked him what on earth a nibble was. He looked all embarrassed and said "you know mom, it's my man boobs." HA...

Habits of a Sugar Addict

2008-10-17T08:11:00.000-07:00

Have you ever watched yourself take on a new (not so great) habit, and just thought "I'll deal with that later"?

I used to never, NEVER eat anything with sugar before lunch. It made me feel sick, and hungry for the rest of the day. OK, I admit, there WAS the occasional splurge, but I felt so horrible afterwards, it would be months before I would do it again.

A few months ago I started putting sugary creamer in coffee. No big deal because I rarely drank coffee. Ummm but suddenly my coffee was tasting pretty darn good (with all that sugary goodness in it). Within a few weeks I was drinking a cup a day... then TWO! The scary thing was... I wasn't going through a ton of coffee, but those little bottles of flavored creamer, I'd have to restock several times a week!

Now keep in mind that I spend 3 mornings a week at a cafe' (yes that is changing soon). At first I was good... a small sugar free nonfat vanilla latte, but I've progressed. I have added Mocha's, sugary lattes, you name it. Add to that fresh baked caramel laced brownies, and sugary lemon scones and my sugar intake is well, OUT OF CONTROL!

I have denied my little problem because I have not been gaining weight. How is this possible? I've been skipping meals to compensate for my sugar calories. Bad bad bad.

So, I feel like crap now. Really. I have this constant low level headache, I'm tired, my skin looks terrible. It was time to do something about it. Last week I vowed to not eat sugar before noon. No creamer, no brownies, nothin'. I made until about 9:30am. Seriously, I'm so addicted to it, I can't say no! Scary.

Today I write this blog to confess my coffee creamer problem (amongst others).

My plan of action? Blog accountability and DETOX. Ugh. That word sends shivers down my spine. Having done it before, I imagine it's similar to what a crack addict experiences. The massive headaches, extreme moodiness, but I have it worse... I also get excessive FIBER intake.

Today is day one. It is only 8:35am. I'm already feeling it. The next few days are going to be BAD.

Refining With Fire

2008-10-09T19:02:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel like I am a failure.

I often second guess the decisions I have made for my family. My heart is to always follow God's will, but the choices we make are often made with a "please turn me around if I'm going the wrong direction" mentality. I mean, it's so hard to know if we are REALLY doing what he wants us to.

I've had a difficult time with my oldest child lately. OK, I'm just going to be real here, I've ALWAYS had a difficult time with my oldest daughter. She is extremely bright, very beautiful, painfully strong willed, and has a rebellious streak. Every boundary has to be tested, beat up and destroyed.

These last few weeks it seems like it's been a war zone with her. The girl gets great grades, and is well behaved at school, but at home she is a "mouthy" rule breaker.

As if that wasn't bad enough, she told us she didn't believe in "our" God. She wants nothing to do with family prayer time, and only goes to church because we force her.

My only true goal for my children is that they know Christ. I hope for success, and friends, etc. but in the end; Christ is all that matters. This new development has devastated me beyond words. Failure.

Leave it to God to bring hope out of darkness....

Yesterday my daughter came home from school in tears. Between sobs she told me how her friend L**** had been bullied at school that day.

From helping out at the school I am familiar with this boy. His family fled Mexico two years ago for America to seek help for their very sick daughter. She is terminally ill. She will be the second sister L**** has lost. L**** is a tall, very handsome boy, who is quiet and kind, and learning English quickly. While our neighboring community has a huge Hispanic community, our little town has very few.

According to my daughter, the kids in her 7th grade class decided that L**** needed to go back to Mexico. They called him names. They told him he wasn't wanted here. Then they started kicking him... repeatedly. While they left no bruises, the boy was in tears. My daughter said that teachers saw this.... but did nothing.

With a broken heart she went to comfort L****. She hugged him and encouraged him. At that point the kids decided to call her names (because she was not joining the torture against him I suppose), but she didn't seem to care. She stood up to these kids. She put them in their place and refused to play by their "rules".

She told me that when things had calmed down, L**** pulled a necklace off his chest and pointed to a small figure on the front. "Do you believe in her?" he said as he pointed to Mary. My daughter said, "well, I believe in her son." In broken English he responded "You remind me of her... she heals people, and you are healing me."

When she told me this I explained how highly Catholics revere Mary, and that this was a HUGE compliment. Her tears continued to flow as she asked to be pulled out of school. "Mom, it's so dark there. I just want to be homeschooled."

My initial thought? Oh yes, lets pull her out so she doesn't have to experience all this evil, then a second wave of thought hit me. "Um, Zoe? If you were not at school today, who would have hugged L****?" She was the lone comfort in a dark day for this boy... enough to make something horrible bearable. With more tears (both of us) she lifted her head and said "you're right, I know that God has this purpose for me at this school, sometimes it's just so hard, but I know it's what I'm supposed to do."

I am so proud of her it hurts! This evening she has a terrible attitude. She yelled at he sister, back talked and slammed her door.

Yes, she is in trouble.

But right now, I don't feel like such a failure.

Maybe God DOES have big plans for this strong willed, rebellious child after all.

See, I have refined you, though not as silver;
I have tested you in the furnace of affliction. Isaiah 48:10

Stay at Home Moms Should STAY HOME!

2008-10-03T07:59:00.000-07:00

As you know, I've started working at a cafe a few hours a week while my kids are in school. At first I thought it would be "no big deal". The kids are in school, so I'm not missing anything. I still have two full days PLUS the weekend at home to catch up on chores. Oh, and the extra money would be fantastic! I figured it would be ideal.

WRONG

You can't have BOTH worlds.

I am so exhausted when I get home, making me pretty worthless at night (keep in mind even though I get off work when my kids get off school, I don't get home until after 6:30 because of soccer, dance, etc). I am unable to keep up on daily chores (like laundry, cleaning floors, etc). So, three days a week I get NOTHING done. On the two days off I have such a huge amount of housework, I can hardly catch up. Another BIG negative is: When do I help out at the school? One of the main reasons we felt at peace about putting our kids in school was our personal involvement AT the school. Now I have little to no time to volunteer. NOT good.

Now let's dispel that myth about making money. Lets do a little math.

After taxes I make $150.00 a week

Extra gas to get to work $15
Extra cost of my kids having to buy school lunch $40
Convenience foods for dinner 3X a week $45
Cost of my own lunch 3X a week $15

My total work costs: $115

So, I'm working for basically $35 a week. Pretty dumb huh.

Let's not forget the non monetary costs! Uh, like my sanity. Or maybe my lack of time to exercise? The lack of time I have to be in God's word.

Let me let you all in on a little secret. I miss cleaning my house! Yes, I said it. Oh, and I miss planning frugal menus, and baking for my family. I miss volunteering. I had it SO good as a stay at home mom, I feel almost guilty!

Now I'm left with some choices to make. I just told the cafe I was going down to 2 days a week (which was all I was originally supposed to do, but they keep scheduling me for more UGH.) I want to quit, BUT, I also want to set a good example for my children. If I left immediately I would leave the cafe in a terrible situation (and it's a small town... I'd have serious evil gossip about me). So, I guess we shall see how I get myself out of this one.

If 6 Year Olds Could Vote...

2008-09-29T21:26:00.000-07:00

Today as I picked my kids up from school, I had my 6 year old son's teacher stop me and ask if we could talk. Knowing my son, I knew it was going to be some sort of misbehaving. Not that he is a bad kid... he's not. He's just more intelligent than most adults, opinionated, hyper, and a little ladies man (he seems to think he needs to find his wife before 2ND grade).

As she pulls me aside, she begins to tell me that she was telling the kids the names of the men running for president. Oh... now it clicks. My son is a hard core.. uhumm, let me rephrase that a HARD CORE Republican. I know this may seem odd for a 6 year old, but the boy was just born with it. So, I figure he's given his vote for McCain speech (that he shares quite freely every time he has the chance). I look at the teacher and say, "oh yeah, my son is pretty opinionated about his politics". The teacher looks at me sideways and proceeds to tell me that when she mentioned Obama's name my son loudly exclaimed "I'm not voting for him, he's a baby killer." My jaw dropped.

OK, I'm the first to admit that we are not big Obama fans here in the conservachick household, BUT we don't sit at the dinner table calling him a BABY KILLER. We have explained that Obama believes it's OK for Mommies to kill the babies in their tummies. We explained that some people don't think that babies are people until they are born, but that we think they are ALWAYS people. (Kids tend to agree with that).

His teacher then went on to say that he rallied the entire 1st grade class around him and told them to all raise their hands if they were going to vote for McCain, and to save the babies from Obama. The teacher said they ALL raised their hands.

She then said that she has had several angry parents call because their children are now Republicans.

Now, I must admit, I felt sorry for my son's teacher. She is sweet and kind, and certainly does not deserve the backlash from my son's comments. so I told her that I would take full responsibility for my son's little political rally, and help her with any damage control. However, let me state loud and clear, I am PROUD of my son! VERY PROUD.

Vegetarian Oat Patties

2008-09-27T12:26:00.002-07:00

I'm always a sucker for Gayle's Frugal Recipe Swap. While I eat a little poultry now and then, I've spent most of my life as a vegetarian, and this recipe is one of my favorites! It is seriously delicious... even meat eaters devour it! Even though it has 5 eggs, I still consider it a frugal recipe because it feeds my family of 6 for TWO nights. I serve it with homemade gravy (or store bought mushroom gravy in a pinch) and a salad.

Vegetarian Oat Patties

2 C cottage cheese
2 C bread crumbs
2 C quick oats
2 onions, chopped fine
5 eggs
1/2 can evaporated milk
1/2 tsp sage
1/2 tsp soy sauce
salt to taste

Mix all ingredients. Roll into meatball size balls and slightly flatten. Pan fry in a small amount of oil until light brown. Serve with gravy. YES.... It is THAT easy!

UGH... 10 Reasons I'm About To Lose It

2008-09-26T08:42:00.000-07:00

It's been just one of those weeks. The kind where you want to crawl into bed and cry, and maybe stay in there for a MONTH! You know.... I 'm a believer in "enemy attacks", and let me tell you, I feel like I'm going down! Seriously, if one more ounce of stress is placed on me, I'm gonna crack.

Now here is where I start whining. Since I never write on this blog anymore, I probably don't have any readers, so I guess I'm safe to unload without any "sorry I'm so bitchy" disclaimers.

1. One of my kids got lice. YUCK. I have never had to deal with this before, but the school has had a huge problem with it this year. Well, my kiddo admits to sharing a hat with a friend, and a week later I'm still boiling brushes, washing sheets, combing hair, and gagging. Yes, I might have not mentioned I have a very weak stomach when it comes to bugs. The entire time I'm combing out the eggs (blughughgh) I'm making gagging noises. My kiddo started crying "mom, your freaking me out" Oh it is quite the ordeal.

2. The stress of not knowing what is going on with my husbands job is overwhelming. Daily we vacillate from thinking that everything is going to be OK, to oh crap... we are going to have to move into my parents basement. It's not like there is a ton of high paying financial jobs around here, so might we have a move in the near future???? However, with the economy so horrible, are there high paying financial jobs ANYWHERE? Do we just start over??? The sad thing about climbing corporate ladders? The long fall down.

3. Teen troubles. Anyone who has a strong willed 12 year old daughter understands that this SUCKS! I really need a Christian support group for teenage parents. Sadly the only class around is offered by families who's kids are still young enough that the parents are under the delusion they can avoid teenage attitudes by their sheer parenting perfection! Ah, I remember those days.... Reality bites.

4. At work, I'm surrounded by Christians who don't like God. Sounds weird, but it's true! They believe, but don't want anything to do with him. Now the big problem is that my life is CENTERED around him. This is really tearing me up from within. I don't want to ruin my witness by being too "preachy" (not actually preaching, just giving God the glory), however if I turn off my open reliance on him, at what point to I get sucked up into world? I am an opinionated Jesus freak... do I change to make the world more comfortable with me?????

5. Even though I only work 15 hours a week, it's enough to cause chaos in my house keeping routine and put a damper on my frugality. Plus my stupid oven broke. We've been eating conveniently which has added 5 pounds bringing me back into the 150's and making me console myself with Hershey's chocolate bars (I've ate 4 in the last 3 days).

6. I'm PMSing

7. Small towns piss me off (too long of a rant to even get into it)

8. We owe a ton of taxes, our savings is tied up in bank stock (that we bought at $23... now it's $3) and my kid needs braces. Lets add in a few car payments, our $800 a month health care insurance, and the possibility of Obama and we may just decide quit working and live off the state (I think we'd have far more $$$ that way). America has made it far more convenient to be a welfare slacker than to work your butt off (so you can pay for everyone elses food, health care, homes, etc).

9. My 6 year old son informed me a girl from his class was going to "hook him up" with her "hot" cousin. God help us.

10. My faith is being tested in every way. I feel so weak... like everything could be lost in a heartbeat. Like tightrope walking... with no safety net.

Workin' Girl

2008-08-30T08:00:00.000-07:00

So here I sit on a Saturday morning thinking about the promises I made to share all about my new job, my dead cat, etc. Really, if I wanted to get my blog up to date I should talk about the economy and it's effect on my husband's job first... but I'm too tired to go there this morning so my slightly out of order story will start with my new job.

Nothing too exciting... I'm working at a local cafe directly across the street from my kids school 2 - 3 days a week. I only work during school hours (8:00ish to 1:00ish), and will still spend the majority of my time at home (or helping in the classroom).I get the cool title of Batista, but really I'm just serving coffee to old guys and hearing all the small town chatter.

Basically, we saw our income drop considerably, and we were having to make cuts. One of the things that was putting a strain on our shrinking budget were my children's activities (dance,gymnastcis, etc). We were down to a necessity only budget so the kids activities were going to have to go. That's when I heard about the job and decided to apply.

There you have it! I actually like working. I'm pretty social so this is a good outlet for me. It's not demanding, time consuming, or difficult so it keeps me open to focus on my priorities... my family. And the best perk? Free espresso!

The down side? Well, I have to wear black so I'm looking pretty goth these days ( ; and avoiding all that small town GOSSIP!

What Should I Post About?

2008-08-26T07:42:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it's been nearly three weeks since I've posted... and I left with a recipe post at that! So much is going on in my life that I need hours to write it all down. I think the daunting task of getting my blog up to date part of what keeps me away.

So what should I post about?

The bad economy and it's effect on our family?

My dead cat?

Our week at fair?

My new job?

My father?

Our choice to stay put in the country?

How stupid I think this whole Obama media hyped election is?

HELP! Where should I start?

Zucchini Casserole to Die For

2008-08-08T08:33:00.000-07:00

Gayle over at The Grocery Cart Challenge is having a frugal recipe swap. Our garden is producing TONS of Zucchini, and this recipe is a delicious (all though incredibly fattening) way to use it up. Below is a variation of a recipe I found online.

Zucchini Casserole to Die For

45 min | 15 min prep

SERVES 6 -8

6 cups zucchini grated or diced (I grated it)
1 cup grated carrot
1/2 cup diced onion
1/2 cup butter
1 (10 3/4 ounce) can cream of chicken soup
1 cup sour cream
1 (8 ounce) package seasoned stuffing mix
1/2 cup shredded cheddar

Preheat oven to 350°F.

In a small bowl, combine cream of chicken soup and sour cream; set aside.

In a large skillet, melt butter over medium-high heat.

Add onion and sauté until soft.

Add grated or diced zucchini and grated carrots.

Stir frequently until zucchini is soft; about 5 minutes.

In a large mixing bowl, combine cooked veggies, soup mixture and seasoned stuffing together, stirring gently until well mixed.

Spread into a lightly greased 13"x9" baking dish.

Sprinkle cheddar over top.

Bake at 350°F for 30 minutes.

To make it a main dish you could add diced chicken... or barbecue chicken and have this as a side. Honestly... I'd just skip the chicken all together and eat nothing but this... it's THAT good!

On a frugal note, I wait until the stuffing mix goes on sale for $1 a box and stock up (we have another favorite recipe that call for it). I also grate and freeze my zucchini when I have it (free from my garden) so I can use it through the winter in breads and casseroles. If I buy the soup mix and sour cream on sale, this recipe costs less than $3, and is more than enough for 6.

Yesterday

2008-08-04T19:49:00.000-07:00

We had quite the traumatic day yesterday.

My husband is part of a volunteer fire department where we live. It's a group of 60 or so farmers (and the random rural banker thrown in for good measure). Several times a summer, a small fire will start up in the wheat fields and it's put out within an hour. Pretty simple stuff..... usually.

Yesterday my husband was called out on a fire. I didn't think much of it. I was making my husband's favorite dinner, and it was just about finished when he got the call. I was irritated. Irritated because he would miss dinner, because I had to take the kids to the 4-H meeting by myself. He asked me to make him a sandwich so he didn't have to leave hungry. I said no.

I fed the kids and got ready for 4-H. With the kids screaming in the car "hurry up mom, we're late" I started to walk outside, but as my foot touched the first step on my porch, I heard God say "you forgot to pray for Chris". I always pray when he heads out for a fire, but this time I HAD indeed forgotten, so I said a prayer for his safety and went off to 4-H.

As we sat outside our group leaders home during our meeting, their phone kept ringing. It was ignored, and we carried about with our decorating and sheep details. Finally someone decided to answer the phone.

Chris had been pulled from the fire and was in the emergency room.

I knew nothing. I drove 90 miles an hour. I prayed like I never have prayed before.

Once I arrived in the emergency room I was bombarded with insurance questions... whay do they do that? All I wanted to do was find out how he was.

They only gave me a few facts

1. He was alive
2. He was talking
3. People were still trapped in the fire

I instantly broke down. I thought of our friends and neighbors that were out in the fire. Who was it still trapped inside?

After a few minutes they took me back to see my husband. He was hooked up to all sorts of machines, receiving oxygen, skin and clothes black with smoke, but he was alive and doing well.

After I held him and cried, I found out that indeed our dearest neighbor was one of those trapped. Sobs and prayers continued.

While fighting the fire, several volunteers went down into a steep ravine a few hundred feet deep. With a sudden shift of the wind the fire changed course and cut my husband off from the others. He had no idea what lay behind the wall of fire that separated them. But he did know what lay between his death and safety. The 100 foot wall of the ravine.

With all of his energy he climbed the ravine with the fire behind him. The smoke filled his lungs, and the heat was unbearable. At one point he said he gave up. He rested on a rock staring at the fire... praying to God that he didn't have to die this way. Fear of the pain as the deafening roar of the flames pounded in his head. At that point he passed out, but awoke to find himself climbing the final stretch of the ravine. Once at top fellow volunteers threw him into a pick up, fled from the flames and rushed him to the hospital.

He did not receive a single burn.

While he suffered from carbon monoxide poisoning, he was expected to have a full recovery.

The friends that were trapped have their own terrifying story, but they too escaped.

The fire was finally put out this afternoon. It got so bad they had to close down the interstate and bring in the firefighters from as far as 100 miles away.

On a final note, I would like to mention that it was around 6:00 that my husband almost died. God stopped me to pray at 6:00.

God is good.

God's Only Plan?

2008-07-31T10:06:00.000-07:00

The following post is a response to what my friend Rachelle wrote. Have you ever started to write a comment and 30 minutes later you are 1/2 way through a mini novel? Yeah, that's why I put it over here instead. Go check out her post first!

Public school for us has been a HUGE positive. I can honestly say, I LOVE my kids school. I am SO glad I listened to God and not my own fears and sent them to PS. It took me nearly a year to let my guard down enough really appreciate the positives though. At first, all I could do was search for the ways it was ruining my kids. All those years of homeschooling had conditioned me to think it was an evil government institution, ready to ruin my children. What I didn't count on was that real living people actually worked there.

There are great kids in the public schools! Oh and yes there are the bad ones, but once you stop fearing "the bad kids" and spend a moment to get to know them, they are just scared and often unloved kids, FULL of God's potential!

I disagree that public school can't be in God's plan for our families. I KNOW his plan contains both public school AND homeschool. I also know we are called to be a light unto the world.

As parents it is our responsibility to educate our children in the way of God. Oh but the lessons they are learning now about God, the lost, and love FAR surpass those I taught them in the safe confines of our homeschool bubble.

My 12 year old daughter has brought 7 unsaved kids to youth group... four of which have become regular attenders, three of them saved. I have no doubt we are well within God's plan.

My kids have learned bad words, heard s*xual comments, been told about evolution, heard the cries of neglected classmates, seen the anger in the fatherless.... They have been teased and had their feelings hurt. With all that we are still VERY happy with PS.

My children have made GOOD friends, but still love the hurting. They are learning to love those who hurt them. They are learning you don't have to agree with the authority, but you do have to respect their position. Even my 5 year old is capable of learning these things and acting as a light to his classroom. Oh, and here is the shocker.. my kids are learning academics! Yes, it's true! The public school can and does teach my children! While my kids are advanced in many areas, they don't know it all, nor do I. Everyone had different gifts. I actually attended my 10 year old's science class on Wednesday's last year, and learned right along with my daughter. Also, my children were far more motivated to do a good job on reports, assignments, etc, because they were publicly recocnized by the school and classmates for a job well done. That was HUGE for us.

Now I say all these things not to say that homeschool is in any way inferior to Public Schooling. It's not, and in some ways it is better. Yet the point here is that there are MANY positives in public school. Your kids CAN thrive... just like in homeschool, they CAN fail. It's all about GOD'S will and purpose for your family.

I spent years miserable in homeschooling, because I inncorectly beleived it was God's ONLY way. I personally beleive if homeschooling is NOT going well for several seasons... I'm not just talking one or two bad months here, but consistently... that you should prayerfully seek a different direction. You MAY be missing out on your family's purpose.

Our kids success has far less to do with where they go to school (or don't), but where they come home to. My kids come home to loving parents who love them AND the Lord with all of our hearts. We are involved, and CONTINUE to teach them what we know. We are nowhere near perfect.. but we know a lot about grace...
Public school hasn't changed any of that. If anything, it's made us stronger. ~Karlie

The Little Things

2008-07-29T06:22:00.000-07:00

I haven't done one of these in awhile... I thought it might be fun.

1.What time did you get up this morning? 6:15

2.Diamonds or pearls? Pearls

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Some kid movie back in June.. I can't remember

4.What is your favorite TV show? Right now, it's Jericho. I'm all about Netflix.

5.What do you usually have for breakfast? One piece of toasted Sesame Ezekiel Bread with almond butter. I do eat the same thing EVERY morning. I'm so boring.

6.What is your middle name? Jean

7. What food do you dislike? Beef

8. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Family Force 5

9.What kind of car do you drive? Kia Rondo

10.Favorite sandwich? Anything with lots of veggies

11. What characteristic do you despise? fakes and liars

12. Favorite item of clothing? My linen capris

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation,
where would you go? Greece and Rome.

14. Are you an organized person? Depends

15.Where would you retire to? Where I am at

16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? I hate birthdays

17. What are you going to do when you finish this? Go on a run (at least that is the "plan", with the way my week is going, I'll probably end up folding laundry instead)

18. Morning person or a night person? night

19. What is your shoe size? What does the size of my shoe tell you about me? 9

20. Pets? 1 dog, 3 cats, 2 rabbits, 2 sheep, 2 horses (on loan), and a phsyco fish named Bubbles.

21. Any new and exciting news you'd like share? I'm going to get a job!

22. What did you want to be when you were little? A princess

23. How old are you today? 31

24. What is your favorite flower? Rose. Mr. Lincoln is my favorite

25. What day on the calendar are you looking forward to? My kids first day of school, but only because THEY are looking forward to it. I'm not the one of those moms who can't wait to unload their kids, well, maybe my 12 year old... but just sometimes ( ;

26. What are you listening to right now? Birds

27. What was the last thing you ate? Do I have to confess? A smores cookie last night before bed.

28. Do you wish on stars? Not for a long time

29. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? This is a dumb question

30. How is the weather right now? Sunny and cool

31. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My mom

32. Favorite soft drink? Coke, in a bottle

33. Favorite restaurant? The Cheese Cake Factory

34. Hair color? Dark Brown

35. What was your favorite toy as a child? Barbies

36. Summer or Winter? Spring and Fall

37.What is in your trunk right now? Sheep feed, towels from swimming, lego pieces, maybe a french fry or two...

38. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate, unless it's cake, then it's vanilla all the way

39. Coffee or tea? Both

40. When was the last time you cried? Sunday

41. What is under your bed? No comment

42. What did you do last night? Baked cookies, and helped my girl;s work on their 4-H projects

43. What are you afraid of? Barack Hussein Obama

44. Salty or sweet? Both!

45.Favorite day of the week? Sunday

46. Do you make friends easily? Usually yes

Lost Poetry

2008-07-28T21:38:00.000-07:00

I was cleaning out an old file cabinet this evening and came across a poem I wrote several years ago. I had thought I'd lost it...

My Soul

Safe in the arms of my Savior
Carried up onto the shore
My ship was all wicked and broken
And could sail on the ocean no more

Storms had stripped off all the finish
The structure now fragile and raw
Cracked by the weight of my burdens
Rusting in each exposed flaw

Wind ravaged my sails of direction
It's course for destruction now set
I threw in my map of salvation
I was lost in the seas of regret

Until one storm came viciously reeling
My ship had all it could take
Once it tore out the heart of my vessel
The rest of it started to break

"Good-bye" to my ship for it's sinking
As the waters rushed up through the floor
The waters were drowning my conscience
While holding shut every door

With my last single breath I cried out
As I never had done before
"Dear Lord, I need you! Please save me!
I can't do it alone anymore!"

The doors of my ship all flew open
As his light washed out all of the sea
I left that ship wicked and broken
And my Lord had carried me

Born again into this vessel
My Father has built it to last
To carry me over the ocean
And sail back again to Him fast

Still I sail over rough waters
But my ship is stronger than the sea
It was built by the strength of salvation
And my Savior is sailing with me

~Karlie

Let's Buy Our Way Into Heaven... And Other Sunday Morning Garbage

2008-07-21T18:20:00.000-07:00

Christ's blood can cover all sins... except one. Not tithing to the church. Did you know that. See, I didn't, but lucky me, I was enlightened last Sunday by a special speaker (that my tithe money brought in, money well spent, don't you think?).

He was a funny Southern man who was charming, made me laugh, and had great claims about his abilities to save well over 200 souls a year. So his claims seemed light hearted, but in reality, the guy was screwy, and legalistic, and lets not forget... totally full of himself. OK Karlie.... maybe the LAST comment was uncalled for, but I'm pissed... and lashing out a bit.

So what exactly did he say? Well, he said that there are no thieves in heaven, so obviously you can't get into heaven if you are not tithing, because you are stealing from God. I couldn't fail but notice that this man was fat. Hmmm, are there gluttons in heaven? So, if it is indeed a sin to not tithe (which personally, I do not think it is) then why can't Christ's blood cover it like the murder, adultery, etc?

Oh, but this sermon kept getting better! This man went on to say that if you don't attend church on Sunday nights, you might as well not attend Sunday morning, because the church only needs "devoted" people. Whatever. I think my Sunday nights are better spent with my family, or fellowship. Heck, I'd be all over Sunday night small groups, but the church refuses (so as not to compete with the empty seats at the 5:00 service).

This speaker was surprisingly speaking on evangelizing. All I could think was "I'm so glad I didn't bring a guest this morning". "Welcome to our church... all we require for you to join us in heaven is 10% of your income and every Sunday night and morning... otherwise you are a thief and not devoted enough to be one of us, and you can just rot in hell". That's gonna win LOTS of souls.

The thing that scared me was all the Amen's coming from the pastor and his wife as this man spoke. As I was praying during worship (before the speaker) God kept telling me that he just wanted me to delight in him. DELIGHT IN HIM! He didn't give me a long list of demands.... a level of performance he wanted me to achieve. I feel closest to him when I just love him. Ugh... I'm so sick of the churches standards! I want to follow Christ!

I must tell you, that the time I was most blessed financially was when we chose to give our tithe to the body... not the church. Each month we would pray over where to put our tithe, and each month, We'd watch miracles happen. GOD was in control of our money. We got to be an active part of the process, and it was beautiful. Now I think it's the responsibility of the body to make sure the pastor is WELL taken care of, that the church has enough money to keep lights on, etc, but since when is the church a building??? Isn't it the body? Just a thought. My church does not take care of the body, just the building, and the special speakers, and lots of fake flower arrangements. Somehow, I just don't think that's what God intended.

OK, I'm done griping.

If You Open Your Mind Too Much, Your Brains Will Fall Out

2008-07-11T12:51:00.000-07:00

Why do I even bother? Every time I go to the doctors, they just piss me off. $150 bucks got me a 10 minute visit with a doctor who cared less about the cause, than he did about sticking me on drugs. He basically said "you've got migraines, here take this drug that will cause you to be dizzy, tired, nauseated, moody, can cause severe liver disease, and maybe death!" Oh yeah! Liver disease and DEATH! Boy, that's WAY better than a headache.

So I sit here contemplating my new over advertised brand name meds. Headache relief... or death? Oh I just LOVE the drug industry! They make liver disease look good in comparison to a headache (how do they pull that off?). Hmm, I wonder if Obama hired the same advertising company? How many idiotic things will we Americans fall for?

My girls are doing sheep for 4-H this year, and the thing that amazes us is how absolutely dumb they are. They get confused walking to their own barn. They seem to live solely to appease their own comforts, They follow each other into barb wire (all for the sake of a good snack), they can't seem to figure out how to get the poop off their butts. It isn't lost on me that God compares us to sheep. We are so easily led astray. We live to serve our own flesh, we get lost.. A LOT. We are easily deceived.

In my headache fog, this post probably makes sense to no one but me, but in my semi enlightened state, I will choose today to make a stand.

No overpriced meds from my high priced drug pusher will cross my lips.

No media brain washing television will make me fall for America's left wing pretty boy.

I think I'll skip the chemistry flavored fast food meal... as well as the $2 soy isoflavanoid health food super ginko bar.

Today I could care less what Brittany Spears is doing, or what Oprah thinks.

Today I'm going to have pride in my stay at home mom, housewife job!

I think I'll skip the newspaper that paints my God as a mythological bigot, and let my Bible be my guide instead.

I'm gonna like George Bush even though that makes me SO uncool.

I'm going to believe what my military friends say over what the news feeds me ... and support this war.

Hmm, maybe today I'll just think for myself. WOW... am I aloud to do that? Today I will choose NOT to be "enlightened", but pray for wisdom instead.

My path IS narrow.

There is only ONE way to heaven.

The media does NOT have my best interest in mind.

God LOVES sheep.

~Karlie

Politically "Uncorrect"

I'm for the low man on the totem pole
And I'm for the underdog god bless his soul
And I'm for the guys still pulling third shift
and the single mom raising her kids
And I'm for the preacher who stay on their knees
And I'm for the sinner who finally believed
And I'm For the farmer with dirt on his hands
And the soldiers who fight for this land

And I'm for the bible
And I'm for the flag
And I'm for the working man
Me and Ol' hag
I'm just one of many who can't get no respect
Politically Uncorrect

I guess my opinion is all out of style
Don't get me started because i can get wild
And I'll make a fight for the four father's plan (That's Right)
Hell the world already knows where I stand

And I'm for the bible
And I'm for the flag
And I'm for the working man
Me and Ol' hag
I'm just one of many who can't get no respect
Politically Uncorrect

Nothing Wrong with the bible
Nothing Wrong with the flag
Nothing Wrong with the working man
Me and Ol' Hag
We're just some of many that can't get no respect
Politically Uncorrect

By Gretchen Wilson

HEADACHES

2008-07-10T13:53:00.000-07:00

I hate to be the kind of person who complains about aches and pains. But.... I've had this stupid headache for over a month! It just started one night, and hasn't gone away since. I've tried EVERYTHING! From large quantities of Advil, extra water, and prayer, to sinus meds, steam, and more prayer.

I despise Doctors, so I've been avoiding going, but today I gave in and made an appointment for Friday. I have no idea what is wrong with me, but I suspect it is something benign, like wisdom teeth, or eye strain. However, with the wonderful world of the Internet, I've discovered it could be caused by any and every disease known to man! You know like brain tumors or water on the brain... I bet Doctors HATE Google.

So, here's hoping for some quick relief, easy answers, and reasonable co-pays. ~K

Country Girl No More?

2008-07-08T22:50:00.000-07:00

As a little girl, I always dreamed of living in the country. I grew up in a typical suburb. Lots of concrete mixed in with man controlled landscaping and an endless view of mini vans. On a sunny day you might even be able to see the MC Donald's arches that stood at the edge of our neighborhood, providing years of happy meals and processed cheese.

My fondest childhood memories were of the times we visited my grandmother and my family's wheat farm. Wide open spaces, country roads, fresh produce, and the animals. I knew my heart had found home in this quiet "peace" of land.

A few years back my dream was finally realized when my husband moved us on to a wheat farm 20 minutes out of town. Boy, it's funny, but our hearts desires don't always turn out like we imagine.

Life in the country these last few years have been mixed with blessings and hard ships. There are nights that I sit on my front porch with a glass of lemon aid and watch the wind blow the spring wheat like seas of green. In those moments, I think I've found heaven. Then there are the days that I feel so alone, so isolated here all by myself. I love to watch my boys play in the wheat, and the girls care for their sheep in the summer, but feel trapped in the cold winter when the house seems too small for 6 people, and the icy roads keep me home.

Despite it's draw backs, we had planned on staying. The beauty and peace kept us here.

Now, as we enter into our third year of country living, we have hit an unexpected glitch in our semi utopia. GAS PRICES. When it costs $10 to get to town, it's an issue. In the month of May our gas bill was over $1000. We didn't take any trips... that was just driving the kids to school (when the bus didn't take them), Chris driving to work, kids activities, and errands.

With groceries rapidly rising, we had to take a good look at our budget and decide what gives. It came down to this. Either the kids quit all extra activities (sports, dance, etc), I stop coming to town for anything other than church and once a week groceries, and we spend all our weekends at home on the farm.... or we move.

We spent most of June couped up at home. trying to cut back on gas. Let me tell you, It was VERY hard. We did cut back on gas by $300, but honestly, I kept cheating and taking the kids to the pool, or the library.

Now, out of the blue we were approached by a family about a house just down the street from our children's school. Houses in this little community are almost impossible to come by because of the fantastic school and "Mayberry" type community. This house would be larger than what we are in now, with a huge yard, quite affordable and is right across the street from a wheat farm. The kids and I could walk to school, sports, the library, the pool, church, and friends houses. With only my husband driving to work (a 13 mile commute) we would save hundreds of dollars a month.

It sounds like a God thing. With everything clicking together like this, one would usually jump at this chance. Yet I hesitate. This little farm in the middle of nowhere has changed me.

It's toughened me up, I can wrestle sheep, capture a stray horse, climb a barb wire fence, and stare a coyote in the eye. I've learned to shoot a gun, run a well pump, grow food from seed, and drive on REALLY BAD roads.

It's helped me to find beauty in loneliness, allowed me to fall in love with the land... not just the idea of the land.

Our decision is not made.

I'm praying for wisdom.

I'm fearing the unknown.... Like neighbors.

I'm worried we'll regret it if we move.

I'm worried we'll regret it if we don't.

It's hard to leave a dream.

No this is not my house (: It's actually an abandoned school house a few miles from my home, and my favorite place to come and pray.

Husband and kiddos in the corral

Can you believe how beautiful this is! These are the REAL colors! Not computer enhanced.

Our sheep Babe and Billy

Back to Posting?

2008-07-08T09:02:00.000-07:00

You know, it's really hard to start posting again after you've been gone awhile. I mean, where do you start? Do you just jump back in? Do you write a lengthy post sharing where you have been? So much can happen, so many blog worthy thoughts can fill your mind over the span of 4 months. Has it really been that long?

My blog looks dark now. I no longer like the black background. My picture seems dated too (even though I don't look any different). I think I need a blog face lift to be re-inspired! Then maybe the thoughts in my head will flow freely into the screen again. In this busy life of mine, I long to carve out a little niche of time to start writing again, AND to start reading again! I've missed my friends!

Excuses, Excuses

2008-03-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess blogging just isn't happening for me these days. Everything is going well here... but I am busy, maybe too busy.

In bulletin points, I'll give you "no blogging" excuses.

* My 9 yr old daughter is well into her gymnastics season, and scoring mostly in the nines. YEAH!

* My oldest daughter is getting ready for her ballet recital and a dance troop competition.

* My two boys have begun their baseball season. With two practices a week and 1 - 2 games. I'm SO glad it's a short season.

* I've been a good wife and have been attending more of my husband's work functions... without too much complaining.

* I've been making it to the gym 4 times a week. Yeah, I'm bragging.

* We've had kid drama. My oldest daughter (12) thought she wanted a boyfriend for a few days (she met him at church, not school so no comments on the "evils" of public school please). I freaked out, made her read every book on "not dating" (I Kissed Dating Goodbye, etc). By the time I calmed down, she was over it (and him).

* It's birthday season. All 4 of my kiddos and myself have Birthdays in March, April, and May.

* My kids are all doing super fantastic at school (honor roll and up!) Nope that's not an excuse for not blogging, just bragging again (:

* We are heading back to our old church. The crazy children's pastor's last day is tomorrow, so the 1st week in April we are going back to charismatic. We do have some concerns, but mostly feel peace (I'll post all about it later).

* After lots of prayer, my husband and I have officially decided that we ARE sending the kids back to public school again next year. For the most part, it's been a good experience (besides the two months we spent sick), and where we are supposed to be for now. Obviously, if I felt God say otherwise, I'd obey. But, as it stands, they are heading back.

* I'm still getting over a head cold and feel a bit fuzzy.

* I've been REALLY into some great books lately, so blogging hasn't been my first choice for my leisure time.

So there you have it. I'm sure I'll get back into the blogging groove again, but for now, I'm taking it easy. I do miss you all, and hope to spend more time reading what all of YOU have been up to! ~Karlie

Character Flaws Revealed

2008-03-07T11:37:00.000-08:00

Today I had an epiphany (I've been known to have those occasionally). It occurred to me that I was not growing up properly. OK, I know that's a vague and confusing statement, but let me explain. Now that I am 30, I feel like I should be, well... more mature. My husband is growing up quite nicely. He wears suits to work and is reliable. He can interact with other adults in a perfect manor. He is conservative in all natures, reads the paper, and flosses. He goes to bed on time, and cleans out his truck regularly. Those are all very good "adult" things to do.

Now there is me. I'm disorganized. I eat salsa for breakfast, and I dance for hours to loud crazy music. Shouldn't I like "big girl" music choices by now? You know, like John Tesh? When should I stop loving Punk, Crunk, and Hip Hop, and head over to soft jazz?

I still twirl around outside to make myself dizzy. I love to stand in the rain.

I don't like housework, and it takes every bit of my strength to actually do it.

I like constant change and become easily bored. I like to play with lip gloss, and day dream.

I can stay up all night reading, or writing, or listening to music. I often jump on our trampoline (all of our farmer neighbors think I'm insane).

I have a hard time enforcing rules... Heck, I have a hard time following them.

Women's groups usually make me nauseous.

I like formal events... but only when I'm in the mood to play dress up.

I'm selfish, and self centered, and ate eclairs for dinner.

I can only pretend relate to "normal" society. I try really hard to care about what people think, but I just don't have it in me.

I dance and raise my hands and loose myself in worship. Subsequently, I make a terrible baptist and think I need to head back to a Charismatic church to be with "My own kind" (;

I feel bad for my husband. I know he so badly wants a wife that is organized, and politically correct, with manicured nails and normal shoes. But the poor guy got me. A bare foot Jesus freak who is flighty, disorganized, and immature.

As time passes, it concerns me that these things are not just flaws of my youth... but who I am.

Right now, as I get into the word, I'm really appreciating John the Baptist. The guy was pretty out there, but Christ didn't say, "hey, grow up and act normal". Christ used John in a powerful way, just the way he was.

I know Christ can use me, despite all of my flaws. In fact, when I dance in the rain... I can feel him there with me. Meeting me where I am at, and loving me just as I am.

Beautiful Prison

2008-03-03T09:36:00.000-08:00

When I was a child, I would dream that I was running. I would run as fast as I could, but would go so slow. I could never pass the top of my driveway. My demons always a few steps behind me.

As a teenager, I loved to run. I would burst out my front door and fly up my long driveway. I would raise my hands high to the heavens as I cleared that last stretch of concrete and stepped into the asphalt of the road. Freedom.

Suddenly, running is good for me again. The sound of my heart beating in my chest, my sweat and tears mixed as one. Country air laced with dust and cold. Spring wheat, new and green in contrast to cherry orchards brown, twisted "winter dead" trees, life not yet stirring inside.

Farmers stop their trucks, offering rides "home". Do I look that out of place? Here in my beautiful prison?

A farm hand with his cold blue eyes stops to talk…. Stuck in his “city” home, the land calls his name, spits him out but keeps me here. Can’t it see how he loves it? Can’t it see that I don’t?

My speed picks up. I watch the sky blur into the hills. I breathe. Methodic steps on cracked dusty roads. With arms stretched out to the heavens, I scream out “blessed be thy name. When the road is marked with suffering, BLESSED BE THY NAME.”

Anger, rebellion, loneliness, disgust, pity, lust, responsibility, hatred, sorrow, fear, stuck at the doorstep of my home. My body carries me…. I am in control of how fast, how far, how long.

When my legs will go no further, and my heart is weak, I find myself back at my front door. I always linger, taking in those last few minutes of freedom.

Then, I open my front door, and I step back into my life.

Thanks

2008-03-03T08:53:00.000-08:00

Thank you all for your prayers. My daughter woke up healthy Sunday morning. GOD IS GOOD! I also appreciate all of the health advice ~Karlie

PRAYER REQUEST

2008-03-01T12:11:00.000-08:00

Well, I've wanted to write a post for quite some time. It's too bad that when I finally do, it has to be for this, but I am seeking your prayer for my sick family, especially my daughter Lilly.

Ever since we started school (just a coincidence?) my family has been CONSTANTLY ill. First we had the flu, then the stomach flu, then strange fevers. Then colds with sinus infections, and just this last week, my son had the WORST case of diarrhea I've EVER seen, and my youngest son had infantigo! On top of that I got strep last week and spent most of the week in bed. Through all of this my 9 year old daughter has been sick the most. She has had blood tests (all normal), but every week, she seems to get sick... AGAIN. I'm really worried about her.

Also, she missed her first gymnastics meet of the season (because she was sick in the emergency room), and was so excited to compete this Sunday. Oh, but you guessed it, this morning she woke up sick. My heart breaks for her, and I'm worried.

Would you all please pray for my daughter? I ask for healing prayers for her, and that sickness is banished from my home! My prayers have been that she wakes up tomorrow perfectly healthy, and that God wraps all of my children in good health.

I also ask for wisdom. Should I pull my daughter out of school for a time to recuperate and build up her immunity? Should I anoint my home with oil? I already disinfected my home, my daughter's classroom (yes her teacher thinks I'm a FREAK), etc. What other steps should I take?

I thank all of you friends for your prayers.

Still Here

2008-02-25T19:52:00.000-08:00

I am still here! Crazy busy... but alive! I miss blogging :( ~K

Snoring Husband's, Taco Bell, and Fat Cupid Cracks (Why does anyone read this blog anyway?)

2008-02-13T23:36:00.000-08:00

It is nearly midnight, and here I am, unable to sleep because SOMEONE will not stop snoring. What a way to usher in Valentine's Day, loud, rumbling snorts. Do you know what I want for Valentine's Day??? Snore strips! Yes, and I want him to wear 6 at once, just to assure me ONE good night of sleep. No flowers, no candy, just snore strips.

I've yelled, I've kicked him, I've pleaded, I even considered smothering him with a pillow, but darn it, I love the guy. So here I sit, blogging at midnight, waiting for the fatigue to be so great, that the rumbling bed and monstrous noises won't affect me.

In this tired state, I think I'll write random Valentine's facts about.. well... me.

1. I hate mushy cards. If my husband wrote me a poem, or got me a card with a bunch of sappy words, I'd barf (internally that is). I mean, I'd try to be nice, but I just can't do the mushy stuff with men. Now a friend could write me a sweet card or poem and I'd love it, but if my husband, or dad did that, I'd get uncomfortable and nauseous. Yeah, I need therapy... whatever.

2. Every year my husband and I get each other a Valentine with a butt on it (usually a half-naked fat cupid, or a card about the crack of "Don"). It's a terrible tradition we started our first year of marriage. It was a coincidence the first year. Ever since, we have searched high and low for the perfect "butt" Valentine to give each other (you'd be surprised how many are out there!). I should state that my husband and I both share the "no sappy card" rule, AND a really odd sense of humor. I also feel the need to tell you, one year I shirked the tradition and bought him a "normal" card and he was dreadfully hurt.

3. We eat Taco Bell every Valentine's day. Yes, another odd tradition that started our first year of marriage. I love the idea, really, I do, but over the years, I have grown to hate Taco Bell. I wish it had been a Gelato tradition or a Starbucks... oh well. Would it be too crude to add that Taco Bell gives "someone" (NOT ME) terrible gas? Gosh, can't a girl get a snore and fart free Valentine's day?

4. I don't like Valentine's Day gifts. I know, I'm starting to sound like a scrooge here, but who wants a romantic gift out of an obligation that is forced by retailers? Jewelry and flowers ANY other day of the year means SO much more.

5. I am obsessed with Valentine's Day decorations. See... I'm not totally anti Valentine's Day. I love pink and red hearts! I am so girly that this holiday just "fits me". I get all giggly when I see frosted pink cookies, and heart doilies. I love to smoother my house in hearts and flowers! My boys are threatening to move out.

6. Every year around Valentine's Day, my mom makes my FAVORITE food in the entire world. Pink frosted heart shaped sugar cookies. I told her this year I would only have 1800 calories worth (I'm serious here; I plotted it out and everything). Therefore, my mom graciously gave some to me, and then packaged up the rest in pretty baskets for me to give to my friends. Would you believe it only took me two whole days to eat them all? Not a single friend got a crumb. Now when I call my mom, I ask for the "Evil Cookie Baker", or the "Purveyor of Fatness".

* On a side note, I spent nearly 4 hours this week on the stupid elliptical torture device to keep from gaining those well deserved cookie pounds.

7. My five-year-old son wrote me a card with a mushy poem on it and I cried, hugged him, and got all sappy.

8. I have volunteered to help at all four of my kids Valentine's Day parties at school. I think I have lost my mind!

9. People who eat healthy on Valentine's Day suck the joy right out of it. My son's teacher wants a healthy Valentine's Day party with a veggie tray and milk. WHAT? These are second graders! That is just cruel. I was in charge of the milk... and I bought chocolate! HA HA HA! I also shoved a bunch of candy in all the kids Valentines. I get being healthy 99.9 % of the time... but today? It's like the person who gives raisins or pencils on Halloween. I mean common! Were YOU ever a kid?

10. The day after Valentine's Day I always have the worst chocolate hangover... and think the grouchy people with the raisins aren't as dumb as I thought.

What is that I hear? Nothing? Could it be that his marathon snore session is over? I best be off to bed before it kicks back up again. ~K

One Month Later

2008-02-10T13:57:00.000-08:00

Here I am, one month into our public school adventure. How have things changed?

Well, I have a lot less time than I used too. Surprised? Me too! All this time I thought I would have freed up by putting my kids in public school, just isn't there. Don't get me wrong, I obviously don't have little kiddos messing up the house, or hours of discipline and education to administer, but an entire new set of activities have quickly taken its place.

I have been enjoying the gym 3 - 4 times a week. Yeah, I know, that might sound like a benefit, but who really wants to go and sweat for 2 hours, while wearing unflattering Lycra, and huffing to keep up with a 70-year-old man, (he kicks my elliptical butt)? Not my idea of fun, but the jeans are getting quite loose, so there ARE benefits.

I have been helping at the school quite a bit. This has been the MOST rewarding. My kids really don't need any help (honor roll babies thanks to that homeschool edge) but I do get to pour energy into the needy kids in their classes. I have one little boy who doesn't have a mother that loves to follow me around. He asked for my phone number... he he. I've met a five-year-old girl who is an orphan. When she asked me why I help out in class, I told her because G*** is my son, and I love him and want to be near him. She flung her arms around me and said, "Oh, that is so wonderful". This little girl is un bathed and neglected, so when I come into their class, she comes up to me and plants herself on my lap and stares. "I love your pretty hair, and your pretty face. I love that you smell like flowers, and that you wear earrings." It brings tears to my eyes. I want to take her home and clean her up! Let her touch her own soft hair, let her smell sweet lotion on her own skin, give her the confidence to see her own pretty face.

I've been quilting! YES my friends, I am tapping into my inner domestic self! I'm almost finished with an actual quilt. OK, maybe it's more of a wall hanging, but at least it's more than a pillow!

I have been cooking quite a bit more now that I can. Our meals are healthier, and I've been saving some $$$!

The best thing I've been doing with my time is a regular quiet time. Not just a little devotion, but a good hour of prayer and scriptures. It has been wonderful to enter into this much-needed season of spiritual growth.

Now before you think it's all just pure bliss, I should also tell you that my kids are exposed to a whole lot of GARBAGE! Daily, they come home with things I wish they didn't know. From perversion, to faulty science. We are dealing with issues daily. My daughter does not care for her teacher, as he often talks about how great "Hillary" is, calls Huckabee, Huckleberry, and tells the class that the world is ending due to global warming. Only the Holy Spirit has kept me from flying off the handle here, but God has said "wait... wait until the time is right."

My youngest son doesn't like school, and often cries in the morning about going. He told me the other morning that he couldn't go to school because school was from the devil (yeah, he's a manipulative genius like that). No, he doesn't really believe that, but he's tried everything else. One morning while waiting for the bus, I asked him "honey, why do you want to stay home so bad?" I figured he would say "because I miss my mom" or "because I like learning at home". Nope, you know what he said? "I miss my tendo (Nintendo)". Therefore, I kissed his little cheek, zipped up his jacket, and put him on the bus.

Kids are mean. Teachers can be liberals. Recess aids are scary. School is rough! Do I love it? Heck no. Yet as I sometimes desire to yank my kids out, I hear God's gentle reminder "I called you here, remember?"

God is actually revealing a lot about the whys I have been called out of homeschooling. It was my vision. Not my family’s vision. While it may be a great vision, it was time for me to step out of spiritual authority, and let my husband step up. Oh my, does this take faith! As I step out, I wonder, will my shoes be filled? Yet I know God would not have me step down, unless it IS his intention to put my husband in his rightful place.

Can I say it again? It is so hard to let go! My hands could no longer hold onto my vision. While it might fall into ruins at my feet, my husband will undoubtedly be called to pick it up. Will he obey his call?

Good Bye T.V... I Want My Life Back

2008-01-31T10:08:00.000-08:00

I wrestle with so many things with "fuzzy" lines of morality. Homeschool vs public, secular music, tv. If only you could step inside my head for a moment, you would understand the constant state of turbulence it is in. While I can so easily slip into legalism, I can also fall the other way too.

For most of our married life, my husband and I didn't have a TV. We stood against what we knew it would do to our minds, and the minds of our children. Well, we all have weak moments, and last Spring we decided to get the Dish. It all started harmlessly with us wanting to hear the news (our local paper is quite insufficient). Last summer, I got a phone call offering a special 3 month trial on a "package" programing. Tempted by the bargain, and my desire to watch the Travel channel I agreed. What's the harm in three months? Right?

Six months later, we not only still have these channels, but we have made TV our family hobby. We used to read, talk, play games, and explore the outdoors. Our time as a family knitted us together, it kept us unique. Now, the second my husband gets home the TV goes on, and stays on until bed. Even our weekends have slowly started to have the TV fill it's hours.

Our sensitivity has gone way down to the terrible things it indoctrinates us with. We used to be disgusted with most programs, and turn them off. Now I hear words and ideals my children should never hear, being force feed to them while us, their parents sit iddley by.

Today, I got rid of the TV. Not the literal box, it sits silently in my living room, closed behind hutch doors, but it's forced content is gone. Not even local channels come in, and I couldn't be happier.

My conviction to get rid of it started the day I got it. Sadly, it took evidence of rotting fruit to get me to act on that conviction. Now, like a weight lifted off my shoulders, it is gone! Obedience feels good.

Before I go, I want to share with you a comment that really spoke to me from my last post.

When I was very young, we didn't have television. When we finally got it, there were few shows on and a lot of dead time where the television, if turned on, looked like snow. It was really a novelty and when used, it was a family event, not something to keep boredom at bay.

When I was a kid, we used our imaginations (a lot). I remember being engrossed in digging a hole to China (for days!) We would put our ears to the ground and convince each other that we could hear people speaking Chinese. I remember building a city for fairies to live in. I remember looking for four leaf clovers for hours on end. I remember hop scotch, jacks, marbles, and jumpropes.

I remember mud pies, daisy chains, and setting a trap to catch squirrels (never did catch one but almost did a few times). We made bug hospitals and I remember playing hide and seek with all the kids in the neighborhood after dark on warm summer evenings. I remember snow forts, sledding, and snowball fights.

When it was too cold to be outside, I remember listening to the radio (They didn't have talk shows but they had comedy skits and stories and I could close my eyes and listen to more than just music). I wrote poetry and stories, we created plays and put together circus acts. I still remember painting baloons black to look like huge barbells and making a lion's mane out of an old dust mop my mom had.

We spread a blanket over the dining room table and made a fort. We took all the cushions off the furniture and pretended they were boats floating on a sea of carpet. We took an old mattress and spent hours sliding down the basement stairs on it. It was just as fun as sledding and much warmer. Cardboard boxes were turned in to cars, airplanes and doll houses.

As I got older, I learned to bake cookies and bread and took them to neighbors. I had embroidery projects that I could work on. I put models together and painted them. We pretended we were secret agents and left secret messages for each other. Oddly enough, one of the last times I went home for a reunion, we talked about this and checked our hiding place and found the last (secret agent) message we had created still in that spot.

All of these things were done with a sense of wonder. Anything was possible when I was a child.

Television, the internet, and video games have changed all that. Our children are being forced to grow up too fast and because they are inundated with "reality" they aren't being given a chance to develop their imagination. I think it's kind of tragic that our children can't think of anything to do if it doesn't entail something that entertains them. Instead, they should be learning to entertain themselves.

What's really sad is that if you mention most of these activities to kids today, they will turn their noses up and say that it doesn't sound fun to them. That's what a loss of innocense does.

Well, enough from an old woman, I'm going to step off my soapbox and go visit my fairy village. ~ GG

AMEN!

What Do You Do About Downtime?

2008-01-28T17:48:00.000-08:00

When I was homeschooling, one of my biggest problems was what to do with the kids during "downtime". You know, that time after the school and "kid" chores are done, and before the afternoon activities start (between 11:30 and 3:30).

Why would I ask this now, as my kids have been in school for the last month? Several reasons. 1. Snow days (which we have had quite a few of) 2. Summer 3. If I ever decide to homeschool again, this issue WILL need to be dealt with. (I should have asked this question a long time ago.)

As I go about my daily chores, my kids gravitate toward the TV, or video games. It seems like such a pathetic waste of time. I am just NOT one of those moms who can get her kids to work on chores all afternoon. I bring out the books, and color crayons, but those seem to be short term fixes. Gosh I guess I'm just not that creative.

So, what do you do to keep your kids constructively busy. Whether it be during your homeschool day, or the summer months. I really DO want your help here!

Thrifty Recipe Swap

2008-01-25T13:21:00.000-08:00

Over at my friend Gayle's blog, she is having a thrifty recipe swap. Isn't that a FANTASTIC idea! We all get bored with the same ol' recipes. It's nice to find some budget friendly variety!

For 15 years I was a vegetarian, and let me tell you, it's a whole lot cheaper! While my family occasionally eats meat now, we still eat vegetarian 4 - 5 nights a week. Here is one of our family favorites. It's on the super frugal side, it's healthy, and SO delicious. Oh, and the best part, ALL of my kids love it, and none of us like peas. It's THAT good!

Fresh Green Pea Soup and Cottage Cheese Dill Bread

Fresh Green Pea Soup
1 Tbs butter
1 c minced onion
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 c veggie broth, chicken broth, or water
4 C fresh or frozen peas
1 c milk (low fat is fine)
black pepper to taste

Up to 3 Tbs fresh or 1 Tbs dried:
Basil, dill, tarragon, parsley, chives
(this is your choice. I have found dill to be the best, and I often add chives and tarragon too. Fresh herbs are the best in the summer when my herb garden is growing. This time of year I make it with dried herbs and again, I think the dill should be the prominent herb)

Melt butter in a soup pot. Add onion and salt and cook on medium until the onion is soft (8 - 10 min).

Add the water and bring to a boil. Lower heat, cover, and simmer about 10 min. Add the peas, cover and remove from heat. Let stand for 5 min (or until the peas are tender)

Puree the soup with the milk in a food processer or blender, then return to the pot.

Heat soup gently. Add your own personal selection on minced fresh, or dried herbs.

*This soup is also great served cold on a warm summer day!

Cottage Cheese Dill Bread
I always serve this bread with the soup. It's great by itself, or with cream cheese and thin slices of cucumbers.

A little butter or oil for the pan
2 c white flour (I often use spelt flour with wonderful results)
2 t baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 t salt
1 c cottage cheese
2 eggs
6 Tbs milk
1/4 c honey or sugar
4 Tbs melted butter
3 Tbs fresh dill, or 1 Tbs dried

Preheat oven to 350 F. Lightly grease medium-size loaf pan.

Sift together (honestly, I usually don't sift to save time) flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Make a well in the center.

Combine cottage cheese, eggs, milk, honey, and melted butter in a separate bowl. Mix well. Add to the dry ingredients along with the dill, and mix just enough to blend. The batter is fairly stiff.

Spread evenly into loaf pan. Let it bake 50 min, or until knife inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before you remove from the pan, then cool on rack for another 30 minutes before slicing.

These recipes serve about 4 adults. Because our kids are still little (we have 4 kids), we can get away with not doubling it ... yet. However, if your family is larger, or "big eaters" you may want to double it. ~K

Oh, and I've got to give credit where is is due. These great recipes come from the cookbook "The Enchanted Broccoli Forest" by Mollie Katzen. The entire cookbook is phenomenal!

Domestic Goddess Personified

2008-01-24T11:17:00.000-08:00

Anyone who knows me, knows that I have a bit of an inferiority complex when it comes to "crafty" things. While I love being a mother and a homemaker, my domestic talents are sadly "lacking".

Several years ago, I had this lovely neighbor who wore pretty skirts, sewed aprons, and wore a bun in her hair. Best of all, she made her own bread! She was a domestic goddess personified. So, in effort to claim some of that goddess vibe as my own I decided to start making MY own bread. The first 15 loaves resembled bricks. After many tears I finally started to make the dough rise, and after several years I FINALLY got the hang of it. I'm just not quick to pick these things up!

Two years ago, we put our little boys in soccer. I noticed a few soccer moms sitting all bundled up at the games, with a thermos of hot cocoa at their side, crocheting cute little hats for their boys. Oh yes! I wanted to be THAT mom! So, I went off to the craft store, and bought everything I needed to create my crochet masterpiece.

The following Sunday I bundled myself up all adorable and soccer mom like, put some cocoa in a mug, and headed off to the soccer field. With crochet needles in hand, I started on a scarf for my mom. Who else here still wants to make projects to give to their mom? I can always count on her smiling and saying it's beautiful no matter how crappy it looks. I just love moms.

It started out just fine, but it kept getting bigger. I couldn't figure it out! Finally I looked down, and realized my scarf was in the shape of a V. If I folded it in half it resembled a thong. Perfect.... I crocheted my mother a "thong" for Christmas.

I could continue with the domestic tragedies, like the time I set our beach house on fire while cooking crab, or the petite fours I made with salt instead of sugar, but I will spare you.

Today however, I had a domestic TRIUMPH! My mom bought me a new sewing machine as an early birthday present. I had several scraps of fabric laying around from other numerous projects "gone bad", so I decided to try and make a quilt. OK, maybe just a pillow... baby steps.

Guess what! I DID IT! If only you could have heard the squeals of delight as I pieced this thing together! I don't think y'all can comprehend how dang excited I am! I danced, I called friends and family to share the good news, every time I walk by the little 14 X 14 scrap of fabric I giggle!

So, here is proof of my inner domesticated self unleashed! (Ugh.. that sounded kind of liberal. How about my inner domesticated conservative self unleashed? Better?)

Here it is! Isn't it beautiful! It really is a pillow... I just don't have any pillow stuff to stick inside.

Here I am posing with my creation. Do you see my joy? I think I look a little psycotic, but that's OK. Unleashing one's domestic self does that ( ;

How Do YOU Make Ends Meet?

2008-01-21T18:12:00.000-08:00

With astronomical gas prices rises, food costs going WAY up, health insurance nearly unattainable (if you live here legally that is) and the big "R" word looming on our horizon, how does a family make ends meet?

We are a single income family, and although my husband has a very good job, we can still feel the pinch in our pocket books.

Now that I no longer have babies in my home (my baby is 5 ): I have the desire to earn a little extra... but I have no desire to get a job that would take me away from my children. I know you all can relate.

I would love to hear what YOU all do to pull in a little extra money. Whether it's to make ends meet, or to afford designer shoes. It would be fantastic to see how all you resourceful ladies do it!

I want details. What you do, how often you work at it, do you like it, etc and if you you want to share how you use the extra income.... go for it.

I have looked for a few years for something that "fit" me. I sadly lack in domestic talents, so unlike Gayle, my extra income would NOT be coming from the beautiful things I created with my hands.

Direct sales (aka Pampered Chef, Mary Kay) were a good choice for me, but the first one I tried ended up being WAY too pushy. I just want to sell stuff... I don't want to build an army of recruits!

I stumbled across Cookie Lee Jewelry at a bazaar about 2 years ago, and thought "hmm, a 50% profit, no presentations... sounds good." After a few months I called the woman who ran the booth, found out there wasn't any pressure to "share business opportunities" WHEW, and signed up.

So here are my details. On average I do anywhere from 1 - 3 parties a month. I do sell a bit just out of catalogues, but it has taken awhile to build up a clientele. On a good month I can bring in a surprisingly large amount of money*, on a bad month I make nuthin'. The Summer is usually S-L-O-W. Although it might be because I'm sitting on my porch drinking lemonade, or lounging at the local pool. I'd rather not work in the Summer.

We spend the $$ on gymnastics (Emily, I know you understand), family trips, Christmas and b-day gifts, etc. Although as the cost of living rises, it may end up being spent on milk (I just paid $5.19 a gallon... no joke). We are also toying with the idea of taking a portion of it to start paying vehicle debt down.

I usually enjoy it, but I wish it was something I created myself. I think I'd get a lot more personal satisfaction out of that. But hey, the money is pretty good, and I get free jewelry!

Your turn......

Sick Girls Don't Play Nice... 5 Rules To Follow

2008-01-18T06:34:00.000-08:00

These last few days I've been sick. Not just a little case of the sniffles, oh no. I've been hacking up all sorts of delightful green goop, and running a 101 + fever, subsequently, if I've left any weird comments on your blogs... forgive me, they sounded normal when I wrote them, but you never know.

Rule #1. People should know better than to require anything of me when I'm sick.

I mean seriously, the worst time to talk to me is when I'm delirious from cold meds, freezing in a 80 degree room, and wiping snot off my upper lip.

Example #1: My husband asked me to get the paper. My response !@#$#@%@ your own %$#@% paper, can't you see how sick I am?

Example #2: My kids started fighting about who had to go out and feed the bunnies. My reply? I fell to the floor in tears (please remember I'm very sick and highly medicated at this moment) and yelled, "FINE, let them DIE! Those poor bunnies never get food. I guess I'll have to do it myself, and maybe I'LL DIE on the way." My kids just rolled their eyes. They know that when I'm emotional I'm a total drama queen.

Rule #2 Don't try to have a real conversation with a sick person.

"Mom, do you think that the pioneers walked by our house back in the 1800's." "Probably, you know if I was a pioneer and was as sick as I am I'd probably DIE." My husband has now forbidden me to talk to the children until my fever goes below 100.

Now here is the best advice I can give when dealing with a sick person.

Rule #3 DON'T call to whine about my kids when I'm not rational enough to be nice to you.

On Wednesday (my worst day) I got woken up from a deep sleep by the phone and a mother with a shrilly voice saying that my daughter is MEAN. Now I know this woman and her daughter, and my daughter and I both decided to mutually avoid this family because they are CRAZY! Seriously! I had also talked with teachers who say this poor girl has had problems with everyone . She gets angry about everything, tells her mom, and then the mother "Attacks". So, I knew the attack was coming. Oh but I so hoped it wouldn't come when I was sick. Yet the phone rang with an anonymous caller ID, and I answered. That leads us to rule #4 Don't answer the phone when you are sick.

I warned her I was sick, and that this wouldn't be the best time to talk to me. Oh, but she persisted. I won't go into the details of the conversation, but lets just say that my daughter's biggest offense was "snapping her fingers in a Z". Now this was in response to her daughter calling mine a looser. All I could do was laugh. My daughter has prayed for this girl, kept quiet when she was rude, replied in kind to her nasty letters, and her big offense was snapping her fingers? Oh, and deciding she didn't want to be her friend (which I suspect is the real reason for all the hurt). On another day I would have had empathy. On another day I would have kept my mouth shut. But this takes me back to rules #3 AND #4.

I know, all of this after my last post about the power of negative words, yet with the exception of my own family, I have no urge to repent. Maybe I just spoke truth? We'll see how I feel about that later.

Rule #5 Don't drive when you are sick

Yesterday I had lunch planned with my dad. I was going to cancel, but when I called he was so excited. He'd had my mom iron his jeans so he could look nice, and was wearing the shirt I bought him for Christmas. On top of that he had gotten his eyes dilated and needed a ride home, and third, he was at the bar... counting on a ride home "if you know what I mean".

So, I threw on some clothes, brushed my messy hair and popped a few Advil to take the fever down enough to function. I looked like pale death, but hey, I was doing a good deed. About half way there is occurred to me that my intoxicated father with the dilated eyes would probably be safer on the road than me, but wisdom isn't a strong point in the "sick mind" so I drove on.

I had a nice lunch with my dad. I picked him up at the bar and drove him to the country club for salads (that I couldn't eat). My husband was there on business and was NOT happy I was out of the house, but didn't say too much. The positive thing about being sick is that everyone fears you! After I drove my dad home I appeared back at my house (I think I drove but I don't remember) I awoke to my husband coming home early to check on me followed by my kids getting off the school bus... the rest was a blur.

Today I feel much better. Not good enough to clean the house or anything, but good enough to write, and maybe eat something besides soup for the first time in three days. I'm going to spend some time in the word today. My only prayers these last few days were "PLEASE LORD, let me feel better."

Oh no, my daughter just said she feels bad... she's running a fever. AAHHHHH! Gotta go!

The Power of Our Words Part 2 :Gossip

2008-01-15T12:48:00.000-08:00

I took a little detour with my last post, because I just HAD to tell y'all about my vacation. Now on the tale end of one weird post, comes another. My gossip post starts with a "prophetic" dream, so if any of you are leery of my Charismatic ways, now would be a good time to bolt.

Is anyone still here?

A few weeks ago I had a dream. Not just my typical chased by a giant Twinkie dream, but the kind where you wake up and think. hmm, I wonder if God is trying to tell me something.

In my dream I was surrounded by my friends, and every time I opened my mouth to talk, these big black bugs would crawl out. Gross huh. I would go around telling everyone that it was the enemy attacking, but all my friends would just laugh and say "oh it's nothing don't worry about it". Hmm, big black bugs in my mouth is nothing? Whatever, it was a dream.

When I woke up, I could remember the dream so vividly. All day long it bothered me. It really had the flavor of a prophetic dream (which I have had on RARE occasions). I prayed that God would reveal the meaning if it was from him, then tried to dismiss it when I didn't quickly hear an answer.

Last week while I was at the gym, a woman from my old church was on the stairmaster (aka butt cheek torture device) next to me. I turned to make small talk and after a few minutes she started to open up about the pain she was experiencing at church. She was being gossiped about in a BIG way, and was suffering at the mouths of a few busy bodies. Her sadness effected me, but what affected me more was the fact she stuck around out of obedience to God. She got all of her strength to show up each Sunday and face her offnders by her complete and desperate reliance on God.

Now here is the "ouch" part. I will admit in front of all of you, that I too participated in her slander. A friend of mine has an intense hatred of her, and after awhile I fell pray to the malicious venom of Gossip, and got sucked in.

As this poor woman spoke about the gossip being spread, I suddenly flashed back to my dream, and at that moment, God revealed my dream. The bugs were Gossip. I was allowing the enemy to attack others through my own mouth. At that very moment I repented silently in my heart. I want to repent ... I WILL repent to her face, but I'm going to need prayer and courage first. Would YOU pray for that for me?

My drive home was filled with epiphany as I realized how I have allowed the enemy to use my words over this last year. I once took pride in the fact I didn't participate in Gossip, and now here I was repenting for a YEAR of "foul" words. A YEAR!

I now recommit to stand up strong against gossip. No more does the enemy have free access to my mouth. I pray that the Lord will build back up the relationships I have torn down, and I pray that my conviction helps those around me turn from this spirit of criticism.

They sharpen their tongues like swords and aim their words like deadly arrows. Psalm 64:3

With words of hatred they surround me; they attack me without cause. Psalm 109:3

you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth. Proverbs 6:2

The words of the wicked lie in wait for blood, but the speech of the upright rescues them. Proverbs 12:6

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Proverbs 12:18

The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man's inmost parts. Proverbs 18:8

Words from a wise man's mouth are gracious, but a fool is consumed by his own lips. Ecclesiastes 10:12

Their lives became full of every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip. Romans 1:29

Satan Crashed Our Romantic Getaway

2008-01-13T16:08:00.000-08:00

Have you ever walked into a place and knew instantly that something was wrong... very wrong? Not by what you saw, but how you felt?

Chris and I have bought and sold many houses over the years, and I know we would sometimes dismiss houses or property because something didn't feel right. Could we feel the previous owners strife and sadness? Maybe their anger?

On the flip side, there are some homes you can walk into and feel the joy and love that a family has imparted into it.

This weekend my husband and I took the second of our Christmas gift vacations. I had booked a weekend at an old poor house that had been renovated and turned into a hotel. It had gardens, and several old buildings turned into little restaurants, vineyards, a movie theater, and a spa. All sprawled over abundant property in a lush surrounding. It sounded like the ultimate romantic getaway.

When we first pulled into the long drive that would lead us up to the hotel my mood sombered. As we stepped out of the car I felt this strange sense of despair fall over me. I tried to ignore it, and decided to not to say a word so as not to ruin my husband's vacation.

We checked in and were lead to our room. Down a long hall we carried our belongings, looking at the elaborate artwork that covered much of the building. The rooms were each named for a person who had lived in the hotel, mostly from the depression era. While the hotel was beautiful, it was eerie and dark. We settled in and went off to explore.

As we went from building to building, I felt almost an evil oppression hang over my head. I couldn't shake it. I wanted to say something, but I figured my husband would think I was weird (well, he does anyway, but this would make it worse). Finally as we sat down to dinner I just had to tell him what I was feeling. He looked me straight in the eye and said, "you too? I've felt it ever since we got here." WHOA, up until now, I just thought I was loosing it, but to have my very level headed husband agree with me confirmed that there was indeed something wrong.

After dinner we meandered through the hotel, looking at the murals painted along the walls. There were faces on the pipes, and eyes on the walls (painted.. not in my head). One of the murals read "SATAN LIVES HERE".

As we walked farther we heard a meeting going on, we peeked in and saw the sign that said NARL (you know, the pro abortion people). They were having a planning meeting, plotting the deaths of babies just down the hall from a mural announcing that Satan lived there... how freaky is that?

Outside in the dark gardens lit by fire were several Wiccan symbols. We went into one of the small stone buildings to get a cup of coffee and were greeted by a room full of gay men, and a large brick fire place that was "jokingly" (we hope) referred to as a place they burned the bodies back when it was a poor house.

As we walked back to our hotel we again explored the old photos of the poor house, and the disturbing paintings on the doors that represented those who lived and died there. As we roamed through the dark corridors... we came upon a door that was painted with a witch. Unlocked we opened up the door and peered into a blocked staircase that led up to the attic. The staircase was crumbling brick and painted in red on the wall was the word HELL.

I didn't sleep well last night. I prayed. I thought about the darkness so thick that I could feel it. I thought about something I rarely consider, EVIL. Spiritual warfare. The realm that we ignore, but does exist. Even typing it here makes me shudder. I know it sounds so weird... but I can't see how a Christian could walk into a place like that and not come away shaken.

To wrap this story up, I need to share with you what we found out about this place as we left. There was a book of the history of the building, and my husband being a huge history buff bought it as we checked out.

On our long drive home we read this book and it all started to make sense. This property and buildings started out as a poor house during the depression era. This was a place where the poor, the sick, and insane were sent against their will to work for food and board. Even children lived with the insane, the sick, and the dying. From a circus lady to a man that was infamous for "exposing" himself, the people who called this place home, led sad and crooked lives.

After this the residence was turned into a place for the sick elderly to come... and die.

Briefly, the final use of the property was for very sick impoverished children. At that point the building was abandoned and it remained vacant for years. Vandals had their way with it, and Satanists used it for rituals for several decades.

When the new owners first bought the building, it was covered in pentagrams, blood, and sacrificed animals were found all over the attic. (This explains the word hell leading up the attic stairs... it was where they did their rituals.) The current owners seem to embrace witchcraft, with art depicting witches throughout the building, tarot cards scattered about, and gardens that revolve around wiccan spirituality.

I had a wake up call this weekend. I learned two very valuable lessons (or reminders). Evil DOES exist, and is alive and well in our communities, and RESEARCH a vacation spot thoroughly before you go!

The Power of Our Words

2008-01-11T11:53:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was having one of those mornings where I just didn't feel attractive. Maybe it was the fact I went to the gym in grungy grey sweats. Maybe it was the fact I went out in public with no make up and without a shower. Maybe it's because the gym has unflattering florescent lights and mirrors EVERYWHERE. It might have been that I bought my sports bra 10 yeas ago and it pushes all my fat up to my neck and out the sides (how's that for a visual picture?). Maybe it was because my "gym buddy" can lift more weight than I (I can out run her on the treadmill though HA HA HA).

As I came home I contemplated the Cheetos in the pantry (a very rare treat in our home). It's funny how feeling bad about yourself can make you eat things that you don't really want. By the grace of God as I was reaching for that 2000 calorie bag of fried orange goodness, the phone rang.

A friend had called to ask a question, but during this quick conversation, she managed to get in that someone had said I was pretty. It was just slipped into the conversation, and she went on to talk about.... well I don't know, because in my head all I could hear was "I'm pretty!" over and over again. My friend had no clue what an impact she had made on my day. On a normal day... it wouldn't be a huge deal, but today, those where the magic words I needed to hear!

As I hung up the phone I had the sudden desire to take a shower, put on my make-up and dress nicely! Those Cheetos had lost their appeal (I mean really, who likes Cheetos?). I had a little more pep, held my head a little higher, and smiled!

What power our words have! This little 2 second comment changed my entire day.

When I was first dating my husband he gave someone a compliment I will never forget. We were sitting next to an elderly woman and he turned to her and told her she was one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. Now keep in mind he was only about 18 at the time, and said it with all the sincerity in his heart. Can you imagine how this made her day? Not only that, but it made me fall more deeply in love with him. To this day, he rarely comments on other people's beauty (just mine or else I'd hurt him), but when he pays a compliment of any sort, it makes me fall in love with him all over again. Our sincere compliments don't only bless the receiver, but those around them, and especially the giver! (Hey, he got me out of the deal!)

Who knows what the impact of our positive words might have on someone. Maybe it will get them to take a shower. Maybe it will change their lives. Some kind words from a stranger created the momentum towards my personal walk with Christ. I'm sure that person had no idea what a powerful vessel they were for Christ when they uttered a few simple comments to me, but they were INDEED life changing.

I encourage you all to go out and bless someone's socks off today! It's so easy, it's silly we don't do it more. Just open your mouth and let God speak life affirming words!

I'd love it if you would share a time words affected your lives for the good!

....Beautiful words stir my heart.... Psalm 45:1

The words of the godly are a life-giving fountain... Proverbs 10:11

Gentle words are a tree of life.... Proverbs 15:4

Gracious words stream from your lips.God himself has blessed you forever.
Psalm 45:2

The words of the godly are a life-giving fountain. Proverbs 10:11

The words of the godly encourage many. Proverbs 10:21

*My next post will be about Gossip, and my own personal struggle with the negative power of my words. Should be painful... but good.*

A Post For Gayle

2008-01-08T19:41:00.000-08:00

So, the kids are only in school 3 days and it snows. I don't mean a little dusting, but big chunks of cold wet fluff falling from the sky at record speed. I got a call from the school bus driver at 6:00 this morning to tell me she wasn't coming. An hour later all the schools closed for the day.

My oldest daughter awoke to the phone call, took one look outside and screamed "nooooooo" She obviously likes school. She moped most of the day about being confined yet one more day in the house.

My 7 year old son then woke up saw the snow and said "good, I think I'm done going to school anyway". Uh, don't think so buddy.

Then out came my 9 yr old daughter "yeah, snow.. lets go wake up G*** (my little guy). So we crawl next to him in bed and she whispers "bunny my honey (her nickname for him) it's snowing, get up and we can play in the snow! WAIT I SMELL POOP! Bunny my Honey? Did you poop your pants?" He opens sits up, sticks his hand down his jammies and says "nope I had a poopy fart, and it burned like fire." (Gayle... that one's for you).

I whisked him off to bath to get cleaned up as he continued to explain the "poopy fart" saga. "Mom, I poopy farted in your bed too... and at school.... and I think I've got another one coming!"

So much for a fun snow day. My snow day turned into laundry day, and my sweet little boy had to stay inside to recover from his "issues".

Barack Hussein Obama

2008-01-08T13:58:00.000-08:00

I know, I said I'd get a new blog going for my political rantings. I have yet to get around to it, but I felt it very important to share some information with you.

More and more I am hearing fellow Christians buzzing about "Obama". Excited by the media hype and promises of change and unity, they are quick to support... before they look at the facts.

Who is this man Barack Obama? He seems so popular with the voters with a win in the Iowa caucus and now looks to be taking New Hampshire. With his eloquent way of speaking, to his attractive smile, this man seems to be taking America by storm. So what does he want to change? What is this man all about? I decided to do some research and was quite disturbed by what I found. I fear that people will be so easily swayed by his appearance, and his promises of a new America and will fail to look at where he stands on the issues.

There has been both truth and lies about Obama. After researching it, I am VERY confident that the voting records and facts I have below are truth.

Now I understand that I have a few Liberal readers. I'm sure to you, these things below are positives, but to those of us who take a Christian fundelmentlist stance, the prospect of having someone like Obama as our president is terrifying. See for yourself:

Barack Obama on Abortion

Voted against banning partial birth abortion. (Oct 2007)
Stem cells hold promise to cure 70 major diseases. (Aug 2007)
Trust women to make own decisions on partial-birth abortion. (Apr 2007)
Extend presumption of good faith to abortion protesters. (Oct 2006)
Constitution is a living document; no strict constructionism. (Oct 2006)
Pass the Stem Cell Research Bill. (Jun 2004)
Protect a woman's right to choose. (May 2004)
Supports Roe v. Wade. (Jul 1998)
Voted YES on expanding research to more embryonic stem cell lines. (Apr 2007)
Voted NO on notifying parents of minors who get out-of-state abortions. (Jul 2006)
Voted YES on $100M to reduce teen pregnancy by education & contraceptives. (Mar 2005)
Rated 0% by the NRLC, indicating a pro-choice stance. (Dec 2006)

Barack Obama on Civil Rights

Being gay or lesbian is not a choice. (Nov 2007)
The politics of fear undermines basic civil liberties. (Oct 2007)
Ok to expose 6-year-olds to gay couples; they know already. (Sep 2007)
Has any marriage broken up because two gays hold hands? (Aug 2007)
We need strong civil unions, not just weak civil unions. (Aug 2007)
Legal rights for gays are conferred by state, not by church. (Aug 2007)
Disentangle gay rights from the word "marriage". (Aug 2007)
Gay marriage is less important that equal gay rights. (Aug 2007)
Gay rights movement is somewhat like civil rights movement. (Aug 2007)
Let each denominations decide on recognizing gay marriage. (Jul 2007)
Put the Confederate flag in a museum, not the state house. (Apr 2007)
Supports health benefits for gay civil partners. (Oct 2006)
Muslim heritage gives Obama unique influence in Muslim world. (Oct 2006)
Politicians: don't use religion to insulate from criticism. (Apr 2004)
Supports affirmative action in colleges and government. (Jul 1998)
Include sexual orientation in anti-discrimination laws. (Jul 1998)
Miscegenation a felony in 1960 when Obamas practiced it. (Aug 1996)
Voted NO on recommending Constitutional ban on flag desecration. (Jun 2006)
Voted NO on constitutional ban of same-sex marriage. (Jun 2006)
Rated 89% by the HRC, indicating a pro-gay-rights stance. (Dec 2006)
Rated 100% by the NAACP, indicating a pro-affirmative-action stance. (Dec 2006)

Barack Obama on Drugs
2001: questions harsh penalties for drug dealing. (Oct 2007)
Do not lower drinking age from 21 to 18. (Sep 2007)
Smokes cigarettes now; smoked some pot in high school. (Feb 2007)
Admitted marijuana use in high school & college. (Jan 2007)

Barack Obama on Families and Children

FactCheck: 'Sex Ed for Kindergarten' means 'age-appropriate'. (Jul 2007)

Barack Obama on AIDS

We need condom distribution to deal with the scourge of AIDS. (Aug 2007)
Homophobia prevents talking about HIV/AIDS. (Jun 2007)
Got tested for AIDS, with wife, in public, in Kenya. (Jun 2007)

Barack Obama on Immigration

FactCheck: Lightning IS likelier than employer prosecution. (Nov 2007)
Pathway to citizenship, but people have to earn it. (Aug 2007)
Give immigrants who are here a rigorous path to citizenship. (Jun 2007)
Extend welfare and Medicaid to immigrants. (Jul 1998)
Voted NO on declaring English as the official language of the US government. (Jun 2007)

Barack Obama on Principles & Values

Don't know if life beyond earth; focus on life here on earth. (Oct 2007)
Real estate deal with felon was "boneheaded" but ethical. (Oct 2007)
I'm a big believer in the separation of church and state. (Apr 2004)

This is just a small portion of his liberal voting record. Don't be fooled. Barack Obama will NOT be unifying both parties. He in NO WAY supports our Christian views. I believe the 2008 election is extremely pivitol for our Christian rights, as well as the moral direction of our country. Our country has rested in the prosperity of our Christian heritage... I fear our nations fate as we continue to wallow in moral decline.

As Christians we all need to intercede in prayer. We also need to be wise and KNOW what issues our candidates support. We DO have a responsibility as Christians to be politically informed, and support our fellow Christians who will bring the RIGHT kind of change. I for one will be spending much time on my knees in prayer during this election process.

OK, I've ranted! Would someone please tag me or something so I can have something light and fluffy to write about? Really, a good post about what color of crayon I would be is just what I need! ~K

PS. My spell check isn't working.... don't judge my lack of spelling ability too harshly ( ;

School, Politics, and Bad Behavior

2008-01-04T16:51:00.000-08:00

I have been trying to post for days, but I never seem to accomplish it, but, here I am! I have so many posts in my head... I really don't know where to start.

Let's see, maybe I'll just post about what I've been up to.

The kids started ps yesterday. Honestly... I love it. So far I'm quite happy they are in school. They had a great first week, my house is clean, I've joined the gym, went out to breakfast with my husband, AND read a book. Maybe it's just the "honeymoon phase" but oh, what a honeymoon!

The one negative is that my 9 year old daughter has a liberal Buddhist teacher (the only non Christian teacher in the school). She thinks he's insane. I tried to explain to her that a large portion of the world believes like him, but she's her Momma's daughter... and lacks tolerance. My kids all sport their Vote for Huckabee 2008 pins (no I didn't tell them to do this) so I imagine it's only a matter of time before the "political views hit the fan".

2. I'm getting ready to start a new blog (in addition to this one). It's called "Housewife for Huckabee". Cute! I figure most of you would quickly tire of my political rantings, so I thought I'd post those thoughts elsewhere. I'll give you the link once it's up and running.

3. Our Christmas was great. My husband got me the same thing I got him, a weekend away! Isn't that a great coincidence! We just got back from the first mini vacation last weekend. He took me to a ski resort town. We hiked, and shopped, and ate, and listened to live music. It was a total throw back to our younger days. A funny thing happened (or maybe not so funny). After dinner we walked back to the hotel and I had a little too much wine (now before you think I'm a lush, I need to state that I almost NEVER drink, and my overindulgence was ONLY two glasses) anyway, back to my story. So, we were in a fancy hotel with a huge staircase that took us upstairs from the dining room. I don't know if it was the heels, or the wine, but I fell "UP" the stairs. I thought it was so funny that I couldn't stop laughing (that WAS the wine). To make a long story short, one of my husbands clients was there and went up to say hi. She took one look at me and said to the people around her, "this is my banker, but I don't know if this is his wife, or his mistress". OUCH! Talk about girls behaving badly. You'd think I'd be safe to goof in another town, but nope. People know my husband EVERYWHERE! On the bright side, my husband thought it was hysterical. I guess if he doesn't care, why should I? No more wine for Karlie.

I think that should do it for now. I could write more, but now that I've talked politics, bragged about gym time, and embarrassed myself, this post feels complete. ~K

Is Prayer Powerless

2007-12-20T19:58:00.000-08:00

All of your comments have been so very helpful. It's funny, but you all agreed with each other. That really says something. I think I agree with all of you, even though many churches I have attended believe otherwise. This does stir up another question though. What place does of prayer have? If our prayer has no power, what's the point... right?

I think back to the Old Testament where God is ready to destroy the Israelites in the desert. Moses pleads on their behalf, and God listens. Was there power in Moses' prayer? How is God so easily swayed? "Hmm, I was going to destroy a nation, but since Moses asked me not to... so never mind". I could so write an entire post on how profoundly this part in the Bible disturbs me.

Then there was the time I felt like the Lord woke me up to pray for my husbands safe arrival to work (I never do this as I'm still sleeping) I prayed... and prayed... and after 30 minutes of prayer I finally felt released and went back to bed. Only to get a call from my husband to say he hit black ice on the way to work, spun around three times, and miraculously straightened out and went on to work. Then that evening a relative said they woke to pray for his safe drive to work that very morning. If we hadn't prayed would he have been in a wreck? Or died? Is there ANY power in prayer? And if there is don't we shoulder some responsibility?

I believe God will answer prayers that align with his will, but if we don't pray, will his perfect will still happen?

Is it god's will that we are healed?

2007-12-18T18:21:00.000-08:00

OK blog friends. I'm really struggling with an issue here. So as I have often done, I'm going to throw a theological question out, and ask that you answer according to your beliefs.

Is it ALWAYS God's will that we are healed?

I came from a church that said it is ALWAYS God's will that we are healthy and prosper. If it's not the case, it's because we didn't pray in enough faith. It really put us in the position of performance.

I remember a devoted member of the church and mother of three was dying of cancer. Our pastor stood up and addressed the congregation and said "those of us not being healed must step up to the plate with our Faith....... If we are not being healed it's our own fault". This woman prayed and prayed, yet lost the battle. The church responded that God did his part, she must have not done hers. OUCH. Can you imagine the pressure she felt? She didn't have enough faith to live? I pity her children who are left to think Mommy died because she didn't pray hard enough.

Still, I KNOW God heals. He healed me. I had to walk out in faith to claim that healing. I called out verses that claimed God's will that we are all healed. Yet I still wonder...

I found this statement on a pro "it's God's will you are healed" website:

Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth (3 John 2). This verse clearly tells us that it is the will of God for His children to be in health. Since it is His will for us to be in health, it cannot - at the same time - be His will for us to be sick! It is God's will to heal you!

In James 5:14, God asks, Is any sick among you? To whom is He referring? He refers to any person who is sick! ANY - the same word He used when He said He is not willing that ANY should perish but that ALL should come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9). If salvation is for all who will repent, then healing is for all who will believe and act upon God's promise in James 5:14,15. Is any sick among you? Let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord: And the prayer of faith SHALL save the sick, and the Lord SHALL raise him up!

Bless the Lord, 0 my soul, and forget not all his benefits; Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases (Psalm 103:2,3). These benefits are for both soul and body - salvation and healing! Christ forgives ALL sins and He heals ALL diseases! So don't just remember some of His benefits, but claim all of them. Healing is the will of God for you!

It sounds good right?

Then I read from a web site that claimed that God sometimes heals... but only if it's in his will (which it's not always). Does God sometimes allow us to be sick, or poor, or martyred because the end result will best accomplish his will?

I do not agree that 'Jesus desires us to be healed of all our sickness'. His purposes are far higher than our desire for a quick fix to our problems. Having said that, it is also sometimes definitely the will of God to heal us and He still does so wonderfully today. But that is why He is our Heavenly Father, faithful through good and hard times. He knows what is best for us, even when we don't.

I think God has given us the book of Job to show that even for those whom He calls 'blameless and upright', He still allows them to suffer (and Job's suffering included physical sickness) if it is part of His plan for the individuals greater good. There are many other examples we could look at - even from the New Testament.

The Apostle Paul - it was because of a 'bodily illness' that he ended up preaching to the Galatians. There is no hint that it was against the will of God that this happened or that if Paul had just had more faith he wouldn't have got sick at all! (Gal 4:13)

Timothy - He suffered from frequent stomach problems. Again, when this is addressed by Paul, he doesn't say 'Timothy, you are out of God's will! Just believe and it will go away!' No, Paul takes a very practical stance in the matter and simply says 'Stop drinking only water and use a little wine.' (1 Tim 5:23)

Other examples could be mentioned like Tropimus (2 Tim 4:20) or Epaphroditus (Phil 2:25-30). But never is there anything in these examples to suggest that they shouldn't have been sick! Unfortunately, because of all the faith-prosperity fakes around, there is confusion on this issue within the church.

I'm confused. I don't know WHAT to believe. Both sides have such compelling arguments... both backed up with scripture. What do you think?

Fake Smiles and My Son... The Ladies Man

2007-12-15T11:15:00.000-08:00

Where is the time going? I've had such a busy week, and it won't let up until after Christmas. I've had the desire to write, but so little time to do so.

We have been doing the Christmas party thing.... with another party tonight. After this, only one more to go! YEAH. I am trying to like these things, because my super social husband LOVES them, and, I DO get new dresses out of the deal. So, time to plaster on the fake smiles and keep my mouth shut about politics and religion, while eating stuffed mushrooms and sipping champagne. Shallow conversations and egos abound. S-L-O-W death for non surface dwellers like me. Oh, but I'm a big girl (did I say I get new dresses?) and I can handle it. I can be shallow... for a good five minutes. That's where sipping champagne comes in handy. My mouth is preoccupied!

Oh, I do have to share, last weekend we went to a charity event, and they had a female pastor stand up to pray. She was abrupt, and new agey, and called God a "she". At that point she went on to pray to Mohammad. I felt a sharp pinch in my right thigh as my husband with pleading eyes and clinched teeth whispered "don't". Oh oh oh, but I must! Quickly I scanned the room looking for someone to unload on. Then I spotted her. A few yards behind me a wild charismatic from my old church sat snickering with her husband. Perfect. I hiked up my skirt and made a quick bee line (that might have got me a place on the football team) right to her. 20 minutes of righting theological wrongs, and I was ready to re-plaster the smile, bat the eye lashes, and keep quiet.

This morning I'm scrapbooking a book for my husbands grandmother (only one more page to go). I'll finish that up, run a quick load of laundry, then start getting ready for tonight. I haven't even got dressed yet... I think I may skip that step today.

As I was messing with my evil sticky photo thingy, my 5 year old son came up to me and said "Mom, I want boobs, but not on me... just some to have." "Um honey, you'll get that when God gives you a wife." "Oh yes.. I can't wait!" Lord help us.

MIKE HUCKABEE

2007-12-11T12:55:00.000-08:00

* (Another Conservachick disclaimer)*I know that many of you are not all that interested in Politics, but I encourage each and everyone of you not ignore this post, but actually read it, consider it, and GET INVOLVED! *

I didn't name myself Conservachick for nothin'! Most of my posts do not revolve around
politics (even though I love them so very much) but around my walk with God, my daily life with my family, and even some theological stuff. As we are nearing the 2008 election, I think it's important I live up to my name, and let you know why it's so important we support MIKE HUCKABEE!

When I first looked at our options for 2008 presidential election I was very discouraged. The Republican choices didn't support my beliefs, and Hillary and Obama would get my vote when hell freezes over! I looked at Mitt Romney (figured a Mormon might share my conservative views) only to discover his voting record was more Liberal than most LIBERALS!

Then I started to hear a buzz in Christian circles about an unknown... Mike Huckabee. He is UN APOLOGETICALLY a Christian. He believes just as I do on all the issues. Speaks with tact, and kindness, and is not run by the special interest groups. He was the Arkansas Governor for over 10 years and before that, a pastor! He was the youngest president ever of the Arkansas Baptist State Convention!

I thought.... this is too good to be true! I love this guy, but this "unknown" doesn't have a shot! Ah, but with GOD, all things are possible. Christians everywhere are starting to catch wind of this candidate who ACTUALLY supports their beliefs! Like wildfire his positive campaign and moral stance on issues are being noticed. People like me... and now hopefully YOU are sharing the news! We DON'T have to settle! WE CAN HAVE THE BEST!

Proof that God's hand is in this campaign? Last week, this unknown with only $475,000, shot up to 25% of the Republican vote. Today, CBS/NY Times poll as well as a CNN poll have us statistically tied him for first place in the nation with Rudy Giuliani! DID YOU HEAR THAT! Look at what GOD is doing!

So what should we do to get Mike Huckabee into office? GET THE WORD OUT! Just yesterday I asked a conservative friend who he was voting for, and he glumly said, Obama I guess. WHAT? What about Huckabee? He replied "who's Huckabee?" THIS is where WE come in. Tell everyone you know about this candidate who really supports our views!

I also encourage you all to donate. Let's encourage a man who is not taking money from special interest groups. Let him continue to answer to God, not the company or cause that throws the most money in his direction. TV ads cost $$$, traveling costs $$$. Shouldn't we as Christian's help support our brother's efforts to get in office, and create real and positive change in this nation? You can donate a just $1! If we all give a little, God can magnify it into a lot.

They also have the option to give $20.08 (for the 2008 election... cute). I thought, I'll skip the fast food this week and give to a GREAT cause instead. It's a win win! $20 bucks to a great cause, and 800 calories less on my butt!

Get a bumper sticker, a yard sign, or do what my kids did! They made homemade signs that said I heart Huckabee, and a few that said "vote for Huckabee or you are dumb" I made them put those up for later ( ;

Anyway, you get the picture, Huckabee is an AWESOME candidate. Hey, but don't take my word for it... see all the new links on my side bar? Click on any of them and you will get to his website. Read about him! Read how he stands on the issues! If God leads you, donate! Then come back and tell me you visited the site! Oh and here is a giveaway Conservachick style.... I'll even send one of you lucky commenter's a Huckabee for President bumper sticker! Yeah, maybe that's not the best giveaway incentive, but I think once you learn more about this guy, you'll think being a part of this cause, is reward enough!!!!

LET'S GET TO WORK!

MIKE HUCKABEE FOR PRESIDENT in 2008!!!!!

Better Than Enchanted

2007-12-07T09:07:00.000-08:00

Check out this shirt! It's kind of blurry, but it says.... CONSERVACHICK! PLUS, it has little pink elephants (Republican ones no doubt) across the front.
HAPPINESS!
Sorry it's not a better pic of the shirt, but my son was only good for two pictures, and he cut the tiara off on the other one (you can't have that can you?). Later I may just post a picture of the shirt... yes I'm that excited about it.

OK, to explain the tiara. I was cleaning the laundry room and there it was, calling to me. I placed it on my head and I was instantly transformed into a domestic princess. I'm gonna wear it all day! I mean really, I've been humming the song to Sleeping Beauty all morning. Even in my un showered, no make up, glasses wearing state, I still feel like I could talk to chipmunks and love dwarfs. Does it get any better than that?

Freedom (Homeschool post #2)

2007-12-05T10:14:00.000-08:00

After my last post, I thought I'd never have the energy to write again. It took a lot out of me. Yet I find this process of writing it all out important.

I covered my Godly conviction in my last post, but I have the personal and emotional aspect of my choice as well. I have felt emotional turmoil over homeschooling for quite awhile, but I wasn't sure where God wanted me. I chose to not act, but to continue my homeschooling path.

Here I am, willing to openly share my struggles with you, and I ask that you please be kind, non judgmental, and understanding.

The first of my homeschool struggles would have to be my inability to keep my children on task. I might have one listening, one picking his nose, one throwing a fit in their room, and one running circles around the house. This could be the great makings of a funny homeschool post, but guess what, it's not funny. I will cry, and get angry, and throw the books down and scream "forget it". With four kids, RARELY do I have all of them quiet and obedient at once. Those precious moments are homeschool bliss, but not nearly frequent enough to maintain sanity.

Is this normal for homeschooling moms? Many books I read would say, "you need to get your kids in order, discipline them, THEN homeschool them." Sounds great, right? Only, as I'm dealing with attitudes, boogers, and 5 year old energy, I seem to never get around to the school part (or visa versa). 7 years of homeschooling, and these last few years I can't seem to manage to get my children to listen to me. So, I try to do school, I try to discipline, and feel like nothing ever gets accomplished.

School (and the drama that comes with it) takes up a big portion of my day, then we have the activities. Add to that cooking three meals, laundry for 6, and constant mess makers who make cleaning like shoveling snow in a snowstorm, I feel like I can never get ahead! Actually, I spend at least 2 hours + a day cleaning, folding, etc, and my house is never clean. It drives me crazy. I don't need immaculate, just tidy. Yes, I know, if I have my children help do chores I will only have to clean 30 minutes a week. I have that book. I guess I'm just not a good enough "manager of my home" to make it work.

While I'm at it, I should say that ALL of those homeschool type books that tell you how to raise perfect obedient kids, how to have a managed schedule, how to do it all... just don't work for me. I want to burn them all for the inferiority complex they have given me when I just can't measure up! I have them all, and all of them have caused me to TRY to perform as I should, but guess what! I am TIRED of performing.

When does the performing "grace" run out and you decide "I'm failing?"

My marriage is suffering. My husband comes home to a messy house, a stressed wife, and 4 unstructured kids. Is it any wonder he keeps coming home later, and later? I don't want to be here anymore than he does.

My health is suffering. I have my own issues I need to resolve (as stated on a previous post). I don't have the time to get myself back in shape (physically and spiritually). Health is important. My children need their mother to be healthy. My husband needs his wife to feel attractive.

My father is sick. They believe he has Alzheimer's. Is it selfish to want this time with my unsaved father? Before he forgets who I am?

Homeschool feel monotonous, miserable, and empty. Yes, we occasionally have those great breakthroughs. The ones where you feel like you made an impact, but each one is a trade off for weeks of uneventful, fruitless days.

What will the future hold? I don't know. Maybe it's for a season, maybe forever. This I DO know. Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Mathew 11:28-30

If God calls me to homeschool again, the burden WILL be light! For a long time, I wondered, am I not praying enough for his peace? His homeschooling grace? Have I not "properly" handed this burden over to him to carry? Or is this burden not mine to carry at all?

You can all think what you want of me, but I am ready to be set free of this "burden" in my life. YES, I have handed it to God. "Fix it Father, I'm not able to do this on my own." So when he says "You've been released, only your fear is keeping you here" I want to shout out and dance for joy! I'm released. Do you hear that? I AM FREE!

A New Season

2007-12-03T10:34:00.000-08:00

Alright, here is my conclusion to my gossip post! I really meant to have it written a few days ago, but the weekend ended up being busier than I anticipated.

Many of the commenter's from the last post said they couldn't wait for scandalous revelations. I think my "scandals" might be disappointing if you were expecting something of Desperate Housewife proportion's... sorry.

I DID however promise long and arduous. That my friends, I can deliver on! So grab a cup of coffee and pull up a comfortable chair. This is gonna take awhile!

To restate the original post, we are going to put our kids in public school after the Christmas break. This might not seem like a huge revelation, UNLESS you have been following my blog for awhile.

A brief history....

Gotta go WAY back first! When my oldest was 3 (she is now almost 12), my husband and I felt a calling to homeschool our children. I know this was from the Lord. It brought so much fruit and growth to our family over the years, I will always be grateful for that season in our lives.

During much of this time, we attended a homeschool group with a very strong leader that I would lovingly refer to as a Militant Homeschooler. This woman was amazing, but quite opinionated. She would preach monthly that homeschooling was the ONLY way. She also ran a course that would "qualify" you in the state of Washington to homeschool. The course required that you read nearly 40 books of her choosing. Many of them gems.. some of them not. All of them supported a homeschool lifestyle. A few of the books went into great lengths about the dangers of public schools, and the biblical mandate to homeschool. Add these teachings to magazines like "The Old Schoolhouse" that say to put your kids in public school is a SIN. And a healthy dose of the Pearls, the Cambels, the Maxwell's, and other perfect jumper clad homeschool families, and I was NEVER going to put my kids in school. I would be a homeschool mom FOREVER!

The problem.... I had taken the words of man above God. While God initially called us to homeschool, my conviction had been replaced by fear and performance. I was so brainwashed by the legalistic mandates that permeates much of the homeschool movement, that I was paralyzed to hear anything different, even the voice of my father. My devotions were homeschool based, we would seek out homeschool friendly churches, my friends were all homeschoolers. I honestly do not know when God's call to homeschool ended, but my suspicion is that it was SEVERAL years ago, but I like my slew of homeschool mentors was opinionated, and God just COULDN'T want me to NOT homeschool, could he?

Last Spring, my husband wanted to put our kids into Public school for the last 6 weeks of the year. I was horrified, but obedient. I cried and mourned my children like you wouldn't believe. I mean really, what kind of good homeschool mom would allow their children to even enter the doors of a public school?

I remember coming home after dropping them of that first day, and crying out to the Lord "Why did you make me do this? How could you make me feed my own children to the wolves?" God's LOUD reply "I AM BIGGER THAN THE WOLVES!" Peace.... my soul finally understood that God didn't call us to live in a bubble to protect ourselves from the world, but to go out and be a LIGHT to the world and GOD would protect us! WOW. I had been living in such fear, NOT faith. for SO many years. It took putting my kids in school for the shackles of legalism to finally start to fall off!

That brings us to what made me change my mind over the Summer, and choose to homeschool the kids again. The REAL reason.

Our school experience was actually a good one. My kids DID share their faith, pray for their classmates, and for the first time in years, I felt like we were making a real impact for the Lord. We had taken a step outside our bubble, not to find people that wanted to destroy us, but people ... children, hungry and eager to know what we had!

Somehow over the Summer, fear took root in my heart. With the busy summer days, my quiet time all but disappeared, and I fell back into my old patterns of fear and loathing of the world. My husband and I would pray for answers about the next school year only to spend twice as long rationalizing why homeschool was better.

Then is happened. One of my children had to face temptation over the summer. My oldest daughter asked me to go to the movies with some friends. She asked if she could just be dropped off, because that is what all the other girls where doing. I said we'd have to pray about it with daddy, but we'll see. Within a few seconds she burst into tears. "Mom, they are going to invite BOYS, and I just can't do it. I feel so uncomfortable, and I don't want to lie to you. I am SO sorry, please forgive me."

Now, this was a pivotal moment for me. Rather than me look at this situation and say, "WOW, my daughter was tempted to do something bad, and turned from it, look at what an awesome kid she is turning out to be." I thought "Look... the world is going to get us! See the temptation she is faced with already! After only six weeks! I must shield her and protect her and SHELTER her so she never has to be tempted again!" Talk about damage done to our relationship. "Yeah honey, if you share something like that with me, I'll freak out and never let you see other children again. Hmmm, sounds like lots of other people I know.

Now add THAT to the years of homeschool propaganda, my homeschool peers verbally assaulting my choice to put them in Public School (this is the peer pressure part), and it was easy to dismiss the hard thing God was calling us to do and fall back into our old pattern of fear.

So we homeschooled again. Fear for not just my daughter, but all of my children, that the big bad world was going to get them and God wasn't big enough to do anything about it.

We went into this year deciding that we were going to put forth full effort to make it the best year ever! While I was sad in my heart about keeping them home (maybe that should have been an indication) I went ahead and made it work.

It was going "well". My kids were learning, we were active in the support group, it was probably the smoothest year I've had yet. But, something was off. Very off.

Re-enter quiet time with the Lord. God brought me into a study about Exodus, and the Israelites who kept going back to their old ways (and yearning for Egypt) despite what God had said, the miracles he performed, etc.

Legalism and fear are my Egypt, and I keep going back to it! God wants me finally set free!

One morning after a study, as I went to homeschool my kids, I knew that God's hand was no longer in it. I could go through the motions, even make it look pretty, but God's hand had been lifted. The result? An empty void... Our time did NOT feel like time well spent. Our calling was elsewhere. I felt it, the kids felt it. My husband felt it.

That was a few weeks ago, and my conviction to put the kids BACK in school grows stronger each day. I am not afraid because I KNOW I will be walking in God's will, and it feels GOOD!

I've had many good years of homeschooling. Years that helped form our family in positive ways. I will always be a strong supporter of the homeschooling movement (at least the part of it that isn't legalistic). Yet I feel blessed to be released from it. I am excited to enter into this new phase in our lives. I know that God is going to do some amazing things! It won't always be easy, God never said it would be. But the renewed faith I have is helping me to live passionately for God.... on the edge of discomfort.

Finally, when I look at choosing between living a safe, fearful, sheltered life, or one one that is crazy and faith filled, and even a bit scary, I'd choose the faith filled life every time! Whether homeschooling, or in public school, in the mission field, or in our own back yard, we all need to let God determine our direction. We need to be making a real impact in our children's lives, and in the world around us. If we are not, it's time to take a second look at our choices. Look closely at the source, is it fear or is it God? For me, that choice was hard. But I'm ready. Ready to turn my head away from my comfortable place of mediocrity, and turn it towards my action packed, never a dull moment, amazing God! Bring It On!!!!!

Gossip!!!!

2007-11-29T11:39:00.000-08:00

Before I start this "Gossip" post. I need to do one of my infamous disclaimers....

* I do not have multiple personality disorders. A little crazy, yes. But, only ONE personality.*

So, have I peaked your curiosity?

After Christmas break, we are putting our kids BACK in public school. Yes, you heard me right. (Now look back at my disclaimer, quick, before you form judgment).

Unlike last time, We feel VERY good about it! AND YES...IT'S A GOD THING!

My next post will go more into it, and probably be long and arduous. Lot's of confessions about disobeying out of fear, bowing in to peer pressure (adults are not immune), and the REAL reason I decided to homeschool again this year. Scandalous I tell ya!

Why Do My Domestic Moments Contain Beer?

2007-11-27T12:55:00.000-08:00

I am having an oddly domestic moment here. They are rare, so I thought I'd better get this idea down before the moment passes.....

I don't usually do recipe posts, but I thought this one was too good not to share! I have occasionally purchased Beer Bread mixes and you can pay BIG bucks for these. Tastefully Simple (a home party thing) sells them for $6.99.. ouch! Oh but they are SO good.

On my quest to be more frugal (it doesn't come naturally) I discovered this recipe for a Beer Bread mix. It took me less than 5 minutes to prepare the mix from scratch. It came out PERFECT, and tasted exactly like the Tastefully Simple version!

Beer Bread Mix

Mix
3 cups sifted flour
3 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
¼ cup sugar

~~~~~~~~~
1 (12 oz) bottle beer*
¼ c melted butter

Preheat oven to 375
Add beer to mix and stir (do not over stir)
Batter will be lumpy
Spread batter into greased 9X5 loaf pan
Pour melted butter over batter
Bake 50 – 55 min
Cool for 30 minutes

*You can also use soda instead of beer, but it’s not nearly as good, and while my kids were acting drunk after eating it, I informed them that ALL the alcohol cooks out. Miraculously, they went back to normal.

I put some mix in cute Christmas bags with the instructions. It was adorable, much better looking than the purchased version. I think I'll make up a few for Christmas gifts for the neighbors!

Crazy Family Members and Thanksgiving Just Don't Mix

2007-11-25T21:56:00.000-08:00

Me and the Hubster.... Surviving Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is always a touchy event in my family. It's the one holiday where we blend my family and my husbands for a mix that is often caustic.

My parents are extremely conservative in the in your face Rush Limbaugh sort of way. Which is great when it's just us, 'cause I like Rush, only my dad likes to drink... alot, so he doesn't quite always remember that I threaten to disown him each year if he talks about politics on Thanksgiving.

My husbands folks are LIBERALS. Which is a dirty word in our house 364 days a year. All except Thanksgiving when we KEEP OUR MOUTHS SHUT!

Add to the mix my "odd" brother who just likes to argue with EVERYone's point of view (and is usually stoned) and my male cat with the "girly meow" that we named Ralph Nader ('cause he's just so off) and we have The kind of Holiday movies are made of.

This year. Things went surprisingly well. I don't know if it was prayer, or my threats that finally worked, but everyone was pretty well behaved!

My brother DID show up in a vintage brown velvet 3 piece suit (and looked a little bit like he belonged in the cast of Boogie Nights).

My dad DID bring several bottles of wine.

My in laws DID spontaneously burst into song at the dinner table (that alone is a MAJOR strike against them... a couple that spontaneously sings loud songs at the dinner table with guests??? Hello, am I the only one who thinks this is odd?). The song WAS about burning the White House down. (I was praying so hard that my dad wouldn't loose it that I think I slipped into tongues). But he didn't (thanks to the wine, I think he was too far gone into his "happy place" to care).

My oldest daughter when asked by my in laws about boyfriends loudly proclaimed (I'm saving my heart for Jesus). YEAH! Then when my in laws started talking about needing luck, she said, "you don't need luck, you need Jesus!" Preach it sister! This momma is proud. Then as we went around the table sharing what she was thankful for she said, "that we can worship Christ freely in this country". YES YES YES! My 5 year old son said he was thankful for his girlfriend (I guess you can't win them all ).

The night ended on a positive note. And that my friends, is what I am thankful for! Only the power of prayer can make an evening go so well with a drunk redneck republican, two mega Liberal wiccans, a stoned young man who looks like a 70's porn star, a Jesus preachin' 11 year old girl, and a gay cat named Nader. God is good!

Here's my Bro. I love him in all of his 70's splendor! This picture pretty much says it all when it comes to his personality!

New Friends, and a Really Cool Gal

2007-11-20T16:51:00.000-08:00

I added some new friends to my side bar thingy. Go check them out! If your not on there, and darn it you think you should be, don't be hurt. I'm on dial up (cursed country life) and it takes me forever to do anything on the computer. I still have a few more bloggers to add, but knowing me, it'll be months before I get around to it.

I've wanted to start highlighting some of my "bloggy" friends ('cause I love y'all so much). So, in no certain order I will occasionally pick one of you to tell the world why your blog is SO awesome!

One of my favorite bloggers is most definitely http://reallyniceday29.blogspot.com/
I have met two bloggers that are so much like me they could be my long lost twin and this girl is one of them. We have so much in common, it's crazy! She is a total kindred spirit.

She's one of the coolest bloggers I've met. Always living her life on the edge for Christ!

She is a hostess to guests from all around the world. She understand the importance of great snacks. She is very deep and talks about cool stuff like conspiracies, and end times.. ooohh it's good stuff I tell ya. Yet she is SO real!

She has one of my favorite characteristics in a blogger. The girl is political! YEAH! I never tire of reading about her newest mission to change the world for Christ.

She's also kind, and transparent, and her blog has the cutest kid pictures ever. You can tell by her pics that she herself is gorgeous.

Kari, I respect you more than you know. Your friendship is a true blessing to me. ~Karlie

Televangelists.... Stink Free Poop (for a price)

2007-11-19T23:53:00.000-08:00

Joel Osteen, (see, he's gone!) ,and the Feel Good movement. My Berean nature wants to rip into that one!

Our country needs outreach. Endless crowds of people pack these Mega churches, yearning for something more. Christ. But... a Christ that doesn't offend. No conviction here. Just shiny happy people in pretty polished places... who never leave the bottle of watered down "formula gospel", and never learn that even in our "happy feel good places" some things are sin.

All the "free" love is bringing me back to my Grateful Dead and Rainbow Gathering days. Where the outside was always loving and accepting of EVERYTHING, but the fruit of that sin left tears and agony once the hype of the "show" (service) was over.

It would be so easy to dismiss this kind of church completely, but I have a friend... One who has been trying to know God for several years. Now I couldn't get her to come to church with me if her life depended on it. Yet I received a phone call a while back. "Hey, I like that Joel Osteen guy. I can really relate! I am faithfully watching him every night." Whoa! Isn't a little watered down gospel better than starvation? I mean, she's getting some good from this, right? Could this maybe lead to more? Is she changing her ways? No, not yet, but maybe one day. Could God be using this televangelist? Or is Satan? I really don't know. If the guy is bringing souls to the lord.... it's GOTTA BE GOD! Hmmmm. Makes me think. What are YOUR thoughts?

On a slightly different note. My kids and I turned on TBN the other day ('cause I love big hair) and a preacher was on asking for money (no.. not on TBN, couldn't be) anyway, he was saying "I hear the Lord talking right now, he's saying that if you have enough faith to send me money RIGHT NOW, God is going to keep you healthy for year (because God only heals if you pay him, right?), AND you get this plastic angel pin for your gift of $100 or more. WOW, a year of health AND a plastic angel pin, this televangelist MUST be anointed. My super fantastic 11 year old daughter chimed in with her best southern evangelist voice and said. "and if you send me $1000 your poop won't stink for a month! Can I get an Amen?" To which the rest of my children chanted "AMEN!"

Oh she gets it. I'm raising her well. You know you have arrived as a parent when your child understands the money driven futile promises of the Televangelist are B.S.

Old Lady Diapers and Tampon Stocking Checker Boys

2007-11-09T08:39:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was at the store with my two boys. (Right there you should know this post is going in a bad direction.) So.... I walked over to the "feminine isle". My 7 year old son in his loud voice (why does he have to talk so loud all of the time?) said "Mom, why are we on the old lady diaper isle?" (A crowd is growing) "Um, son, these aren't old lady diapers." He ignores me and his eyes get big as I put one in the cart. "MOM" he continues "You wear old lady diapers?" (why is the checker boy always stocking the tampons?). "No son, these are special things for girls, and we will talk about it later". (The crowd of people start to giggle). This is where my dear five year old chimes in. "Yeah, I've tried those diapers on before, but they kind of fit funny so I put them on my arms and made floaties for the bath... only they don't float."

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Why? Why? WHY do I take my boys out in public places?

And The Bad Parenting Continues....

2007-11-07T12:06:00.000-08:00

When I wrote my last post, I had several people in mind, but there is one particular mom, that makes my blood boil more than most. Really, this is the parent who has the naughtiest kids, yet is sure they can NEVER do wrong.

Now it would figure, that my humiliating "bad kid" moment of the week would involve an altercation between her 8 year old boy and my 5 year old son.

During gymnastics the mom's all sit around watching their daughters while the siblings play in the other room. I could see the boys out of the corner of my eye as this woman's 8 year old son pushes my 5 year old around. His mom was watching saying things like "look at how strong my boy is". UGH! Anyway, as I got up to go save my 5 year old from this bully, the 8 year old came in crying to his mother. "Mom, G*** called me a bad name and it really hurt my feelings. " His appalled mother looked at me in disgust (this is where I take my cue to go discipline my son).

I go and track him down and ask him if he called this boy a name. My son said "yes mom, but he pushed me, and laughed at me, then made me eat his ABC (already been chewed) gum." "I understand that you are angry, but you are going to have to apologize." "But, mom, I'm NOT sorry". "I know, but you have to anyway." This whole time, we never covered the name he called this boy... I assumed it wouldn't come up again... whatever it was.

Anyway, we walked back into the room filled with all the gymnastics moms, staring at the drama no doubt. He walked over to the boy and his mother, red faced with anger and tears dripping from his eyes, he said in his LOUDEST voice, "My mom is making me say I'm sorry for calling you a PENIS FACE". Then he walks over next to me and starts laughing hysterically. Now me, being the really bad mom I am started laughing too. As the onlookers shook their head in disgust, I leaned over to my son and gave the mandatory speech. "Now honey, that kind of talk isn't appropriate, next time he hurts you, just punch him instead."

OK, that was my last Bad Parent post for awhile... at least I hope. My next post will be on something far more cheerful... Bulimia!

Back Talking, Butt Biting, Kid's With Horns

2007-11-02T15:54:00.000-07:00

Are your kids perfect? Mine aren't. Seems like I'm the only "Christian" parent I know with less than perfect kids.

Sometimes I need to talk about how darn hard being a parent is. I want to lay it all out and say "this is where I could use some advice" or "how did you deal with this?, 'Cause we are having trouble". Only problem... No one else will fess up to having any problems.

Example 1: "My boys have been arguing more than normal lately." My friends reply "Sorry, can't help you, my boys don't argue.

Example 2: "My oldest daughter has started back talking, I need to curtail it." Friend's reply: "What? My children would NEVER balk talk me, they know better because we TRAINED them properly".

OUCH way to make me feel like I deserve the "Crappy Parent of the World" award.

Now, when these perfect kids come to my house, they argue and balk talk (must be in the air or something). So, I'm left with two possible conclusions. 1. I am the only parent in my church without perfect children, OR 2. They are all a bunch of liars.

Anyway, I need friends with kids who make mistakes (and admit it). Friends whose kid's fight, or bite butts, or froth at the mouth and grow horns when they don't get their way. (Don't ask about the butt comment... it's been a bad week.)

I need advice from people who have been there, or are in the thick of it! People who are not afraid to admit that their children have caused them to more than once to loose their temper (in a way that required an apology) or got so frustrated that they locked them self in their bedroom, curled up in the fetal position and ate fudgecicles. PLEASE don't tell me I'm the only one who does that.

Oh and if you have done something awful and irreversible, like let your kid watch Shrek, or owned a Harry Potter novel, or maybe even bought sugar cereal (gasp), even better! I get exhausted trying to maintain everyone elses standards on top of my own, so standards often slip... can anyone relate? Whether right or wrong. It would be nice not to be judged for my choices. I'm sure God's got that taken care of, thank you very much.

Also, if you yourself can confess to having a hard time maintaining "personal" perfection... I'll like you even more. Uh, hello, my name is Karlie and I stole ALL the Reese's Peanut butter Cups from my children's Halloween candy. I also only do laundry when we have no more underwear, and we've eaten fast food three times this week,"

So, if you are a imperfect mom, with imperfect children, let me know! You can share, or just "confess" without the details. I need to know you are out there!

Allegiance

2007-11-01T08:04:00.000-07:00

At our local highschool, the Mexican immigrants are refusing to stand for the pledge of allegiance. They refuse to stand for the American flag. With their own Mexican flags high in their yards, and displayed from their cars, it's clear to see where there allegiance is.

My thoughts????? If they don't like what America stands for, they should GO BACK HOME.

Quiet Time

2007-10-31T08:57:00.000-07:00

When I first got saved, people would talk about their morning quiet time with God, and I thought they were Spiritual GIANTS! I mean really. Who could talk to God and read the bible for an hour every morning.

As time went on, I figured most people were lying about it... trying to get a little holier than though action.

Then I joined a church that held me accountable for my time with God. A 5:00 am phone call from the pastor's wife summoned me with "get out of bed, it's time to go talk with God." 60 + INTENSE minutes of on my knees prayer, on my pastors lead. I pressed, and pressed for miracles, not for relationship, but for a display of God's power. Did I grow? Heck yeah. I grew enough to hear God say "I don't want your prayers out of obligation and duty, I want your time because you love me.. oh, and leave that crazy church while you're at it."

This season was one of the most difficult spiritual time of my life. For the first time I heard God... I mean I HEARD God. He spoke to me in dreams, I heard his voice, I had visions. The experience made me into a full on believer of Spiritual gifts (where as before I doubted them) because I experienced them first hand. It scared me. God is big. SO BIG. Then to have God say, "leave this place. Your loyalty is off, you are you here for the wrong reasons".

I took a sabbatical from morning prayer. I would pray, but the formality and schedule were gone. I leaned on worship. I loved his presence, but honestly, I didn't want to talk anymore. The things of God were so much more intense, with so much depth, so much unknown. I was scared by his power. Scared of being THAT close. Scared of myself.

Then began a season of Spiritual shallowness. The less I talked to God the less I could hear his voice. "Yeah God, we can hang out, just don't talk to me about anything but shoes". That's where I would take my Christian friendships too. Don't go deep... it's easier to swim in the shallow end.

For three years I would "try" morning quiet time. "I'd wake myself up at dawn and try to create intimacy with my God, but I didn't know his voice anymore."

Worship was all I had. He was there, but I was STARVING for more. I wanted my "best friend" back, but I couldn't find him.

Then, I heard a small voice whisper "Go to my word, I'm waiting for you there." It started slow. I read, I prayed, with little "nuggets" of gold along the way, but nothing substantial. I had to really want it! So I persisted. I got up, and had an hour long "quiet time" not because I had to, but because I wanted to. And would you guess. THAT is where God met me. Not in the place of obligation, but in the place of love.

His miracles don't scare me anymore. I laugh with delight when I see his powerful hand, when I hear his voice. Sometimes our time is intense.. like before, but usually I just have coffee with him while he gently leads me through his word.

I finally get it.

Harvest Party and Pumpkins

2007-10-29T22:20:00.000-07:00

On Friday we had our annual Homeschool Harvest Festival. The kids had a blast, my husband came because I made him, and I (with a cold and a fever) sat around making foolish small talk with the other homeschool parents. The kids might have loved it, but for me... it was slow death. The things we do for our kids.

Here my 3 oldest kiddos. A mad scientist, a bride, and Marie Antoinette. Oh yes, and Genevieve, the stuffed pink elephant with more personality (and possessions) than most people.

Here is my little fireman. Actually he is throwing a fit here and doesn't want his picture taken ('cause real firemen don't do that I guess).

Just had to compete with Cindy's domestic sewing post. Here is a pumpkin I grew all by myself! We even carved it and saved the seeds! (They are rotting in my fridge as I write this). Maybe... I'll harvest my pumpkins and make pumpkin pie from scratch! Or maybe I'll carve leaves in it and add a tea light! Yeah right. I'll probably just do the same thing we did last year. PUMPKIN SMASHING! The perfect sport for slightly deranged housewives and their rowdy children.

Man Fur

2007-10-28T19:41:00.000-07:00

Tonight at dinner my oldest daughter was being a typical 11 year old (if you get my drift) and my younger daughter said "why is she like that?" My 7 year old son replied "because she's going through pooberty." Then my daughter asked "what's pooberty?" He then said in a very matter of fact tone, "it's where girls get all sassy, and boy's get their "man fur". Man fur? Just another typical conversation at our dinner table. ~Karlie

Doormats

2007-10-26T14:39:00.000-07:00

I'm sure you've all read the verses in 1 Peter 3 1:6. It's the one where it says for wives to be in subjection to their husbands, have a meek and quiet spirit, etc. I believe we should always follow God, and that God wants us to submit to our husbands, but where.. WHERE do we draw the line? Is there a line?

I read an article today in the new Above Rubies about a woman whose husband wanted to live frugally, so he moved her (she was pregnant) into a two man tent in a park. She wanted a home, but instead ended up giving birth to her baby in a tub outside her tent. She now has two young children and is still roughing it with her husband. Was she wrong to want more? We live in America. Should we be content to live like those in a third world country, when we don't have to? How about her husband? Was he shirking his responsibilities by not providing better for his wife?

The article bothered me. I love my husband and try to submit, however if he CHOSE to move me into a tent and had me give birth in an outdoor tub, I'd be pissed off! We are not talking super broke, need to make the best of a situation here, but choosing this for your reluctant wife and children, it just seems wrong.

It's not just this article that makes me question submission in some circumstances.

I recently read Created to be his Helpmeet by Debbie Pearl. The book was helpful for me because I have a FANTASTIC husband! He is a great father, provider, and would never dream of taking advantage of my submissiveness. The biblical principle of submission works great in my marriage, because I am married to a Godly man.

I gave the book to my mother. My mother is an awesome Christian woman who has been devoted to my un saved father for over 30 years. My father is an alcoholic. He is mean, and abusive. He calls her names and has to control every aspect of her life. He puts down their children (that would be me and my brother) and gets angry when she spends time with us. He wont let her go to church, wont let her have friends, etc. He also gets angry at her if she won't drink with him (she's a diabetic and this is very dangerous for her health). Any freedom my mother gets, she has to get by putting her foot down. Se has to "disobey" my father's commands.

My mother read this book, and with prayer, decided to follow it. The results? My father thought he had more rights to bully my poor mother and fully alienate her from her family, her hobbies, etc. She cried to me one day. It's like a prison.. and I would rather die than live in it."

I told her to throw out the book and stand up for herself. What really is the line of submission? Does anyone know? Should my mother live in hell to obey the rule of submissiveness? Is that REALLY what God wants for her? I don't know, with tears of anger I scream I DON'T KNOW!

Praise God I don't have to bare what these two women must bare. Honestly, I'd be gone! I say I don't believe in divorce, yet that is easy to say because I have a great marriage. To spend my life with someone like my father? I don't think I could do it. I didn't do it. I ran away from home at 15, to escape him.

Where does God stand?

Halloween

2007-10-24T13:22:00.000-07:00

Every year we re-evaluate our stance on Halloween. With 11 child filled years behind us, we have had several years to consider the pros and con's. The outreach potential, the harm, etc. Honestly, we are no closer now than we were 11 years ago on deciding what is best for our family.
Some years we have trick or treated. Some we have done the "harvest festival" thing, many years we have rented movies, and ate candy... lots and lots of candy!
This year we are watching one of my daughter's friends during the day. This girl and her family are single handed proof that you can have AWESOME kids in the public schools. This girl made the choice to not go to school on Halloween because the spirit has convicted her about being apart of the Halloween school activities. She's 9! My kids would love the opportunity to participate in the "scary" Halloween stuff. I hope she rubs off on them.
Friday we have a homeschool party where the kids get to dress up and play games. As for Halloween itself? No clue. Do we hand out full size candy bars with tracts at my folks house? Do we rent a movie and visit with friends?
What are your plans for Halloween?

Finally, Peace With the Caped Homeschooler, and other Mid-morning Epiphanies

2007-10-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

I'm stealing graceforgayle's idea. Rather that come up with new blog material this evening, I've decided to reach back into my homeschool blogger archives and pull out one of my old posts. Thanks for the ideas Gayle! ~K

Homeschoolers have always been stereotyped as "weird". I'm going to be honest here. It has bothered me that I was clumped in with a group known for being social misfits, having bad hair (my husband and I lovingly refer to it as "homeschool hair"), and strange attire (remember, I've always admitted to being a little shallow).
I will never forget my first visit to a homeschool support group. We saw all the stereo types. Boys in grey sweats, denim jumpers, doily collars, homeschool hair that should be illegal, AND.... a homeschooler in a cape. A CAPE! (We've often joked about that one over the years.)
We knew we were called to homeschool our kids, but this sensory overload was daunting to say the least. We obeyed the Lord and homeschooled, but spent the next 5 years trying to prove to the world, and ourselves, that we were not one of those homeschoolers. Homeschoolers can be hip and fashionable. They don't have to have odd interests, and a Lord of the Rings obsession.
OK, now that I've probably offended 1/2 of you, stay with me, I'm almost to the epiphany part.
Last Sunday, I met a lady at church (she's new to town) and we hit it off. She had a great personality, kids my kids age, and seemed like she had a strong relationship with the Lord. Best of all, she seemed so NORMAL. We exchanged numbers and agreed to talk more.
Yesterday we did just that. She talked about how much she loved her kids school. She raved about the well behaved kids and the involvement of the parents. OK, this sounded pretty good, so I asked, "what about the school teaching world views? Aren't you concerned about your kids being bombarded with evolution or the homosexual agenda?" (I get right to the point, can you tell?)
Her response floored me. "I want my children to accept diverse people and ideas, and not be so close minded". WOW! This lady had bought the liberal world view hook line and sinker! Then it occurred to me, this IS normal. It's normal for Americans (even church going ones) go against biblical truths in favor of a world view, it's hard to go against the grain! No one wants to be the weird one, right?
Epiphany time. I DON'T want to be normal! I want to go against the world's corrupt ideas and instead embrace the will of my God! If that makes me weird so be it.
Yesterday evening, my husband and I talked about the conversation I had earlier that day, and he said, "I'd much rather our kids befriend a homeschooler in a cape than a wishy washy Christian kids with a liberal world view."
So, here we are full circle. Suddenly that caped homeschooler isn't so bad, and normal doesn't look so good. I'd much rather have friends with substance and a firm relationship with the Lord, than be normal.
Finally I've made peace with the caped homeschooler, and in the process, I've made peace with myself. ~K

And do not be conformed to this world, but transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2

Boys and Clothes

2007-10-20T22:16:00.000-07:00

What is it with boys and their clothes?

I love to shop, wear new things, accessorize. I'm really not that picky, it's just gotta look good. Comfort is second.

The men in my life are of a totally different persuasion. Fashion matters to them, but it's so SO wrong. My 7 year old son spent the last week in his boxers and a red cape because he thought he looked "cool". My brother wore a "security" shirt for three years straight because he thought that "chicks dig it". It was a lonely three years for the boy.

I also noticed that fashion comes w-a-y after comfort (it doesn't matter if the I accidentally bleached the black pants to a putrid brown," 'cause they are still SO comfortable").

Oh and they are so picky. My boys cry if they get anything from Gymboree. A sweater with a cute little train on the front? I might as well have brought them home a tutu! My manly boys will look at me like I've lost my mind! Now a camo shirt, that's more like it! But, goes so far beyond that. They have other weird "fashion" do's and dont's that would baffle any female mind.

One thing I just don't get... my boys HATE jeans. They actually are not fond of anything that does not look like the jogging suits they wear on the Sopranos (no they haven't seen it). They only like fabric pants... especially if the are "silky". Now they are sometimes forced to wear jeans, which they have re named "itchy wiener pants". They will cry and moan, and walk funny to dramatize their discomfort to the world, but hey, if their daddy can handle jeans... they can too.

Oh and church clothes.... right up there with the "itchy wiener pants." They hate them. They fight me every Sunday. "Mom, why can't I wear sweatpants and a muscle shirt? Instead I stuff them into khakis and the dreaded "COLLAR SHIRT" there is no torture like the shirt with a collar! Then I nicely spray their wild hair into submission with a respectable side part that would make any 70's car salesman proud. They argue "Jesus wore a robe to church, and I bet he'd like sweats too." I reply "honestly boys, I think Jesus is probably on your side, but Mama's not, so tuck in your shirt and don't even think about unbuttoning your top button on those pants."

By the time they get in the car, their hair is messed up, and they have managed to get mud on their pants, jelly on their shirts, and a few toy guns in their pockets. Yes... Sunday school teachers LOVE us.

Once church is over, we barely make it though the door and they strip down, right in the living room. Seriously. Nothing but tidy whities. Then they lay on the ground and roll around like a dog in the mud after a bath. They remain in this mostly naked state for several hours (to recover from the church clothes trauma I'm sure). Then it's back to the silky mafia inspired sweat pants.

I look back on the pictures of my brother as a kid and he's always go the same red sweats on. As he grew, the pants just shrank, until he looked like he was sporting a cute pair of capris (way before they came back in style). He would pair these bright red disasters with some random shirt with an Ewok or a Storm Trooper on the front and think he was the coolest kid to walk the earth.

My conservative dad got a pair of zebra striped parachute pants (remember MC Hammer?) in the 80's and wore them CONSTANTLY, until they mysteriously disappeared (thanks Mom). (I must say in my dad's defense that they were a gift, and I know he wore them for comfort, NOT fashion, but it just goes to show... no one survived the 80's unscathed.)

My husband has a pair of furry pants with little ducks on them. I think they are supposed to be for duck hunters or something, but I call them his "ducky pants". I don't understand the magnetic draw they have, but he's got them on within 30 seconds of walking in the door. It's like superman.... only faster. He doesn't want to talk, eat, NOTHING, until the suit is off and the pants come on. What's the deal?

They say clothes make the man, right? I certainly hope not.

Women Of Faith and a Day With My 5 Year Old

2007-10-14T20:59:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went to Women Of Faith. I'm sure you have all heard of it. I had an awesome weekend, however, the actual conference itself left me a bit disappointed.

I always like to start on a positive note, so...

The great parts:
A weekend with friends. Great food, great fellowship, shopping (I hit up Eddie Bauer and Gap outlets and made out like a bandit!), deep debates over religion well after midnight, and laughter. Lots of laughter. AND, none of that was at the conference!

The conference had it's good points too. Again, I laughed, and laughed , and... you get the picture. I heard some great stories, but really, that was about it.

The messages were VERY entertaining, but nothing I've not heard. There were no "wow, God is really speaking to me here" moments. I felt an undertone of , shall we say ... feminism. I guess a woman beating out her male co -workers to become the president of a bank, or a CEO of Mobil oil does NOT impress me, but I'm an old fashioned kind of girl.

I could overlook that, but there was one thing that really grated on me throughout the conference.

"Buy our books, if you buy 5 you get our discount, AND a free tote bag!" "If you adopt a child through World Vision AND use your credit card you can get this nifty shirt!" "Sign up now for your Women Of Faith credit card!" Yeah, that's in scripture. "Buy this CD". "Sign up for this other conference", etc, etc, etc.... The materialism was enough to make me want to barf! Between speakers they would put commercials on the big screen selling their "stuff". It was like the friggin' circus!

Did I walk away from Women of Faith with a few good nuggets? YES. It wasn't a bad experience, but I think my expectations were to high. I wanted great worship, and a fresh word. I didn't get that. Instead I got a sales pitch, and a message that I felt was tainted with a "world view" Javamama loves that word ( ;

I'm not against women working, I'm not against selling books at a conference, heck, I'm not even against credit cards used wisely. I guess I was just repulsed by the format they used.

Next year I'm going back, but I'm skipping the conference. My friends and I are going shopping, we are going to chow down on desserts, and stay up all night talking about shoes. We are going to find a church with great worship or go to a worship concert, then go back to the hotel, pull out our bibles and get our fresh word straight form the source. I'm going to hear testimonies from the "Women of Faith" in my very own hotel room. Then I'm going to write another post telling you all how great it was!

On a completely different note. My youngest son (he's 5) has decided he's a hardcore charismatic. At church today (keep in mind we are at a baptist church) he started to raise his hand (very cool... his rebel mama does the same thing despite the dirty looks she gets) Then both hands went up high, and he went into some odd goofy dance. At this point my husband and I were laughing pretty hard (probably the reason for the dance). Then he started laughing. Before we knew it the whole family was in hysterics (Toronto style) although I must admit it wasn't holy spirit induced. Finally an older gentleman looks at him and says "why are you so wild today?" His totally matter of a fact reply "'cause I've got rabies".

It was the best worship I've had at that church yet. Thank you God for my crazy children and husband who find humor in the driest moments!

On the way home my husband asked my children what they wanted for Christmas (I do NOT agree with Christmas talk before Thanksgiving, but too late, The "P" word (present) was mentioned and there is no going back now)... back to my story... my oldest daughter said "drums and a baby sister (boy is she out of luck this year) My second daughter said an Ipod (what do they think we are made of money or something?) and a baby sister. First born son "ipod, baby sister". I see a theme.

Now my five year old thinks for a moment. "I want a goatee, like daddy's, and some baby stickers." I give up.

Thankfulness

2007-10-11T21:08:00.000-07:00

Today as I woke up, I was summoned outdoors by a beautiful fall morning. I wrapped up in my soft pink robe (that has seen better days) and greeted the day on my rickety old front porch. A sudden wave of thankfulness hit me as I drew my first breath of crisp cool air.
God has provided blessing all around us, ones we often ignore. Yet my senses were heightened this morning to the vast array of his gifts around me.

Lord, I am thankful for:

Fall mornings, where the first splash of new color glistens on trees, like gold in the shifting sun.

To be greeted by my rust colored hound. His wet nose. His playful eyes. Unconditional love, where my just my presence... is enough.

Daddies and little boys up before dawn. Bundled and warm. Fishing stories and hot cocoa in a big grey truck. Watching the sun rise over the lake, poles in hands, eyes wide with anticipation. Powdered sugar smiles... evidence of breakfast still lingering on their sweet breath.

Husbands who leave a full pot of coffee for sleepy wives. Pumpkin pie creamer swirls with rich coffee in my favorite blue cup... a goodbye gift from precious friends. It reads He fills My Life With Good Things. Psalm 103:5. THANK YOU LORD!

The harvest waiting for me in my garden. An afternoon bounty of golden corn, juicy apples, and perfect pumpkins. Produce baskets overflowing, warm spicy smells from the kitchen, cinnamon candles, and the soft song of a flute, a practicing melody lingering behind my daughter's door.

Giggly girl sleepovers. Trampoline tricks after dark. Laughter that echoes in an endless rupture of glee. Pizza boxes and root beer stains. 5 sleeping girls who are not yet pining for their breakfast.

An old friend beside me. I can't see his face, but I know he is there. His handiwork is in the beauty of this morning. He is my father, my savior, my best friend. His endless love finds pleasure in delighting me with a morning like this... a moment like this. No words can describe this feeling of unmeasurable gratitude.

It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to the Most High. It is good to proclaim your unfailing love in the morning, your faithfulness in the evening.... You thrill me, Lord, with all you have done for me! I sing for joy because of what you have done. Psalm 92: 1-4

Happiness Is Not The Goal

2007-10-10T21:29:00.000-07:00

As we raise our children, we often make their happiness our primary goal. I know that if my kids are not happy I will try to juggle, bend, and manipulate the situation until they are appeased.
Will this create positive fruit in my children? Just because a child has an appetite for something, is it always in their best interest to feed it?
My daughter wanted to go back to School. She threw a fit when she realized that we would be homeschooling her this year and my first impulse was to begin my child pleasing juggling act. Where would it end? Would I ultimately give in to her perceived agony, and go against God to appease her?
Oh, poor girl needs socialisation. She doesn't get the gratification of her name on the honor role, the rights of passage like prom. Think of the slumber parties she might be missing, the pep rallies, the lunchroom chatter, or the fully functioning science labs! How can I compete?
Thoughts like these are enough to make a tired homeschool mom with a messy house and a grumpy daughter throw in the towel! Then I look out a bit further. Am I raising cheerleaders, or ambassadors for Christ? Do I want to have my child graduate school and say "whew, we made it! They are not drug addicts or pregnant." Or do I dare to hope for more?
I want God's plan for my children. I want to see them grow up to be full functioning Christians. People who serve God, not their own appetites for "happiness" (because we all know where TRUE happiness comes from, and it's NOT from our flesh).
Looking at the big picture makes choosing to continue homeschooling so much easier. THIS is the path God has directed me to follow. THIS will be the path to reach our goal. What is my ultimate goal for my children? To love and serve our Lord! With that in focus... the other things just seem to fade away.

The Value Of Contentment

2007-10-03T07:35:00.000-07:00

OK, maybe a firm goodbye was too harsh. While I have very little time to blog right now, an occasional post is downright therapeutic (as is reading them).

So what brings me out of blog exile today? A lesson. Sometimes God speaks to you, it makes such a profound change in your heart, you NEED to write it down (and share it with others).

Yesterday I brought dinner to an old neighbor who was moving in to a new home. She had sold her Mc Mansion around the same time I sold mine. While we moved off to the country, she moved to a nearby city to a larger, more elaborate home. After a year, she was back.

Her new home was an old duplex on a busy road. She made a few excuses about the home, then started crying. She proceeded to tell me that when they moved into their "new" lifestyle, they suddenly realized they couldn't afford it. This mother with her three little children had to go back to work to help make house payments. After a year God provided an out. Their house that had been up for sale nearly the whole year finally sold, and a job opened up for her husband, back home.

As the tears welled in her eyes she said "I was never content. I always devalued my role as a stay at home mom, but when it's taken away from you, you suddenly realize how wonderful it is. Now I find joy in just being with my children, holding their hands."

WOW!

I have started to feel the seeds of discontentment creep in. My old farm house is too small (2000 sq ft). The drive is to far (12 min). This town is too small (yet has little crime). I don't have enough friends (then who brought me several dinners when I wasn't feeling well?). Being a housewife is too un-gratifying (yet what is more gratifying than raising your own children?)

Now I close my eyes and imagine it. A big house in town, tons of shallow friends, working full time to support my over indulged lifestyle. Kids in school, then daycare, like they are not even mine. It sounds like hell. With our lack of contentment, Satan has tricked so many of us into our own personal hell on earth.

I put too much value on what is not important, and that breeds discontentment. I care too much about material things (houses, clothes, etc). Too much about my appearance (I've never been content with my weight, even at size 4, and no matter how hard I try, I'm never quite as pretty as I'd like to be... oh and aging makes the battle darn near impossible). While I seem to care less than most, people's negative opinions can still affect me, .... And God whispers "let it go". "Let It ALL Go!"

Every season, I feel like God gives me a theme; words and lessons that revolves around a particular area in which I need growth. This season through much prayer and confirmation, I believe my "theme" is "how to die to my flesh". While my Christian walk has been laced with that principle, I feel like God wants to help me reach new levels in my "death walk". Sounds morbid? No, sounds like freedom.

The first step? To learn the value of contentment.

Goodbye

2007-09-17T14:25:00.000-07:00

I really like blogging! I like making friends from all over North America, and learning about their families! I like being able to debate issues and seek prayer with just a few key strokes. I like to keep in touch with friends that I've moved away from. With all these positives, you'd think I'd like to blog forever... and I would. However, now that our school year has started, I feel like I just don't have the time to write as often as I'd like, so I start to feel guilty. On the flip side, when I take time out to blog, I KNOW I'm neglecting things that are more important. I am great at procrastination, and blogging seems to feed this "talent".
I'm sure y'all know where this is leading. Yes, it's time to shut the blog down for awhile (metaphorically speaking). I may come back at a later date, but for this season, the computer is going to remain off (except for online Gymboree sales, he he). I will miss all of you very much, but my family needs me right now (as does the laundry, and the pantry, and the garden, and the ..... you get the picture).
With all my love and warmest prayers for my beautiful blogging friends, AND their beautiful families. ~Karlie

Harvest, Sectionals, and Church

2007-09-16T18:54:00.002-07:00

Thank you all so much for your prayers! We were all quite healthy for the gymnastics meet. My daughter did very well, and scored mostly in the 8's (which I hear is good for a first meet). She qualified for sectionals, and I guess that must be a good thing considering her coach was smiling when she said it ( I really know nothing about gymnastics... yet). Anyway, we are SO proud of her!

This week I imagine homeschool will be put on hold. Our garden has decided to "ripen" everything at once, so my week will be spent canning tomatoes, beans, corn, and pickles. My apple tree decided to ripen as well. The tree was quite fruitful this year and I lost count after 200 apples (seriously). That means canning applesauce, baking pies, fruit leathers, etc. While I love "domesticating" for the fall season, I always put on a few pounds. I feel like I'm barely maintaining the weight I lost over the Summer, and it might only take a few pies to put me over the edge. Oh, to be blessed with self control. Could I make a pie and not eat it? Nope... not possible.

We have found a church!!! YEAH! It was actually right under our noses the entire time. We had dismissed it because the worship is not to our liking. Still, we had seen so much "fruit" coming out of the body that we gave it another look. No church is perfect, and it is very difficult to find one that encompasses all the elements we desire, so my husband and I took a long look at what we could compromise.

We could NOT compromise doctrine. It had to teach the scriptures. We also HAD to have a safe, solid place for our children to grow in the Lord.

Now what seems to vary so much between churches that met these MANDATORY criteria was
1. The worship
2. The preaching
3. The body (or community of believers)

What area would we except mediocrity?

What could we get elsewhere?

Good worship is not hard to find. Whether at a Saturday service in our neighboring town, a Christian concert, or with the Newsboys Devotion CD in my own living room.

Preaching can be found on TV, the radio, in books... no shortage there, so as long as the preacher was teaching God's word... we could forgo the entertaining charismatic preacher.

Now we come to the church body. If we had a need.. a real need, would my Devotion CD pray for me? Would Joyce Meyers bring me dinner??? NO. The body was the one area of the three that was the most important... it's the body that makes up the church!

Once we looked at what the church really is (a body of believers, not an entertainment committee) it was easy to find our home.

Already we have been blessed with godly relationships, personal spiritual growth, and a renewed love for church (remember my I hate church post?).

So once again I rejoice in answered prayers. Once I let go of my personal expectations and let God lead the way, I found true happiness in unexpected places.

A Better Week and A Prayer Request

2007-09-13T19:08:00.000-07:00

Thank you all who commented words of encouragement on my last post! I'm glad many of you had a nice laugh at my expense ( ; .
This week has been quite a bit better. We only had one major breakdown (it's Thursday), and I've not heard much along the lines of "PLEASE let me go to school." Although during prayer time this morning my 5 year old prayed that he could go to Kindergarten.
Academically I couldn't be more pleased. I can't believe how fast we are progressing. Our morning conversations have really made my children's minds come alive with opinions and ideas. I have had more thought provoking conversations this week than the last 6 months combined!
We have diligently followed a (loose) schedule every day and that has been VERY helpful. We have a set time to wake up, set times for chores, and a set time to start school. We then do bible and science as a family. At that point our schedule loosens up a bit as we finish our school work up (anywhere between 12:00 and 1:00). By 3:00 our numerous activities start, but the business has really helped my kids feel like they are not missing anything socially (which is a HUGE answer to prayer).
We are doing a "bit" of P.E. Mostly push-ups, sit-ups and running laps (which I do with them). They get quite a bit of exercise from sports and dance, but I'm kind of weird about health, so I've got them working out anyway.
Tomorrow I clean! Morning chores take care of the laundry and surface stuff, but I need to do some detail cleaning and scrubbing! I think I may need to take every other Friday off to make sure my fridge doesn't grow mold and cupboards don't attack (my son was hit in the head with a bottle of Torani syrup yesterday due to cluttered cupboards.... he was fine but I had to mop the floor 4 times to get all the sticky goo up).
On a separate note. I have a prayer request. My daughter has her 1st gymnastics meet this Saturday and there has been a lot of sickness going around. My first prayer is that she stays healthy as this meet means the world to her. My second prayer is for my health and the rest of the family. We all want to be there to support her on her special day! I have had a headache and light headedness all day, and just recently got a runny nose. Not good signs, but I am trusting the Lord to keep me able to attend her meet (I'd have to be unconscious not to go, but I'd much rather feel well). Oh, and you can pray she does an awesome job at her meet too! THANKS!!!
Well, I'm off to read a few of your blogs... and see how the new school year is treating you! I think I'll make myself a cup of Echinacca tea, then go to bed early! ~Karlie

Week One

2007-09-08T18:57:00.000-07:00

Well, we made it through the first week.

Day one... My husband came home to me crying, saying I was putting the kids in school.

Day two... My husband came home to the kids crying, saying "PLEASE DADDY, PUT US BACK IN SCHOOL."

Day three... I yelled at the kids, did all my laundry, ran around town like a mad woman.

Day four... The cats pooped in the fire place, my tire went flat and I spent 3 hours in Les Shwab waiting for them to fix it. Meanwhile my 5 year old son made friends with a Hispanic family and informed them it was OK that they didn't speak English, because he speaks Mexican! Then he proceeded to say Hubala humuna humuna. They didn't look too amused.
THEN I lost my 7 year old son. He said he was going to the bathroom. 10 minutes later, he's still gone, so we look in the men's bathroom... EMPTY. I look all around the tiny little tire store with no luck. I'm ready to lose it so I yell out his name. A grunty reply comes from the WOMEN'S bathroom. " Yeah mom, I'm in here pooping, and it's a big one". (He failed to read the sign on the door I guess). Well another 10 minutes later he comes sauntering out with his shorts crooked, patting his belly, with the biggest smile possible ( you know, the smile that says I just accomplished something great).
A few men who had greasy shirts and a little too much crack action thought my son was just great.
Then, an Asian family walked in and guess what! Yeah, I found out my 5 year old speaks "Chinese" too. Who knew?
My oldest daughter spilled popcorn all over the floor, my nine year old had gas. What do you do in that situation? Do you say"That terrible smell is coming from my cute little daughter, not me" Or do you just ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist? I never learned the answer to that in etiquette school. (Yes I DID go to etiquette school when I was 13, and NO I obviously don't apply any of it).
Finally the tires are done and as we leave I get the question "Hey? why aren't your kids in school." "Uh, yeah, we uh... homeschool." People of minority and men sporting crack everywhere have now joined in the anti homeschool movement thanks to me.

Day Five... We had our homeschool dessert picnic (I brought Oreos, because I'm so domestic and all). My sons introduced the homeschooled boys to the word "nuts" (I am still dying of embarrassment as I write this). My daughters openly said the the homeschoolers in this town are "so weird". (More embarrassment). I got signed up to head publicity for the group. Now admit it... THAT'S funny. Oh and I cheated on my "diet" and ate 2 lemon bars and a "few" cookies ( I lost count after 3).

Today... I got my hair done.

Tomorrow... We are going to our new Church! (The details in another post)

Monday... Still homeschooling. I'm not throwing in the towel just yet. We DID cover Communism, the Taliban, Afghanistan, the fall of Rome and how that relates to America thus proving the pertinence of history lessons, early Chemistry (my kids laughed every time I said "gas" so we focused a bit more on liquids and solids), the shifting of continents, Albania, the Azeri people, Islam (and why they hate us), PLUS 5 lessons of math, English, and reading for each child.
You have to admit, with the week I've had, I kicked the school's butt in the education arena. Now if I can just keep myself from loosing my mind, I may make it though week two. ~Karlie

PS. My son wants to be the Grim Reaper for homeschool harvest party. Since they already think I'm awful I think I'll let him go for it. I'll just say he's a bible character....Satan.

Starting Homeschool Tuesday

2007-09-01T15:15:00.000-07:00

Tuesday is the big day! We start homeschool again. I am not actually ready to start, but figure I better get going. We have Math and English curriculum for the kiddos, but decided to not use a curriculum for Science, History, etc. It should keep it pretty relaxed... I hope. We are going to study the Solar System as a family and end with a night time field trip to an observatory. Honestly, that's all we have planned outside of the basics, but I'm OK with that.
Soccer has already started for the boys, and next week we add fall gymnastics team practice for my 9 yr dd, ballet (on point... had to add that 'cause I'm just so proud) for 11 yr dd, homeschool band for 11 yr dd, and Awana's for the boys (only because we are already in town that evening). Is that a crazy schedule or what? Oh and before I get posts telling me to tone down my schedule, let me state for the record, we LIKE it this way. After being home all day, by 3:00 my kids are begging to get out of the house. I am usually a bit burnt out by May... if only activities ended mid April, oh well.
I imagine I won't have too much time for blogging until I get our routine down, so if you don't hear from me for awhile, that's why. I really want to put my focus into a positive start for our year these next few weeks. Ah.... priorities.
I'll catch up with you guys in a few weeks when things settle down (unless something REALLY cool happens that I just have to share, or I get an uncommonly deep thought). I pray you all have a great start to your homeschooling / school year too! ~Karlie

Things I'm Into

2007-08-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

As a little girl, I had a pretty blue box, a bit bigger than a shoe box that I would keep my treasures in. Some things would stay in there for a season, some forever. I put in my VERY favorite books, cassette tapes, articles, and of course, my dairy.

I don't have that blue box anymore ( I tossed it after I had kids... I didn't want any "mamma before she was mamma" incidents, but my desire to cling on to my favorites has not changed.

So what am I into right now? So glad you asked because I was going to share anyway ( ;

The new Johnny Lang CD, Turn Around. It is SO good. The guy is like 21, became a famous Blues artist at 16, and got saved! His CD is pretty much about his faith and it ROCKS!

When the Day of Evil Comes by Melanie Wells. This is easily my favorite Christian fiction novel. I literally couldn't stop reading it until it was finished, it was THAT suspenseful. I highly suggest you get yourself a copy, BUT don't start it until you can devote the rest of the day to finishing it. Her sequel Soul Hunter was every bit as good (maybe better), so you might as well pick than one up while you are at it. My only complaint; Mrs. Wells does not write fast enough! I can't WAIT for #3.

Created to be his Helpmeet Debbie Pearl. OK, I must admit, at first I HATED this book, but the more I read it the more I realized it was biblical truth, and as I applied it to my own marriage, I saw AMAZING results. This is NOT a feel good book. This is an in your face, tell it like it is battering of conviction. Like boot camp, it wasn't fun, but I learned so much in a very short time... and it DEFINITELY changed my marriage for the better. A MUST READ! Just calm down and pray about what you read before you send me nasty e-mails for suggesting it. ( ;

Nars has this blush, and it has a "naughty" name that I won't mention here, but the stuff is gorgeous! Pricey, yes, overindulgent yes... but it makes your skin look SO pretty. You can buy it at my favorite store in the world Sephora.

Quorn. It's a super protein, soy free, meat substitute. I'm not a big meat eater, and I DON'T do soy products (that stuff is dangerous in my opinion) so it's nice to have a healthy alternative. Especially one so tasty! This get my vote for the best health food product on the market!

So there you have it! These are my newest discoveries, worthy of my blue treasure box (that is decaying under tons of garbage in a landfill somewhere... but that's besides the point). So, be sure to check them out, and share yours too! You never know when I'll find a new favorite, it just might be one of yours!

I dedicate this post to my fellow bloggers who helped me finally figure out the link thingy!

HELP.... I'm Confused

2007-08-29T08:37:00.000-07:00

We are still church hopping here over in my neck of the woods. I'm starting to think we're going to have to settle. We DID find a great church for us (two of them in fact) but they were in a neighboring town, over 45 minutes a way. It just seemed like it would be too hard to be an active member of the body when we live so far away.
Now we have been looking locally at one church pretty seriously. We like a lot about it, so I did my typical (call and grill the pastor to make sure there is nothing goofy). You would be surprised to know how many churches actually think the bible rules don't apply to them.
After a nice conversation I brought out the fundamentalist" big guns" abortion and homosexuality. Now here is where I got caught up a bit, He said that while they believe what the bible says, and homosexuality is wrong, they welcome practicing homosexuals into their congregation. No, they do not preach to them about it nor ask them to change because they want to first develop a relationship with them and hope someone might council them at a later date.
My reply was "Would you let a man who is cheating on his wife bring his mistress to church and not call him on it?" "Oh, no, of course not, we'd follow biblical procedures A, B and C." It sounded a bit like a double standard to me and made my conservative self shudder.
After I hung up and I talked with my hubby we resolved to NOT attend the church. Now I have been thinking... am I too harsh? What if I had a close homosexual relative? Wouldn't I want the opportunity to bring them to church and lead them to God? Maybe I'm being brainwashed by the Liberal influences around me... I don't know!!! What would that be saying to my kids if we attended a church that looked the other way? What about people who show up high on drugs, or drunk, or weigh 300 pounds from their gluttonous out of control life style? Should we say, "I'm sorry mam, you can't attend this church unless you stop stuffing your face with donuts." A sin is a sin. AHHH!
What do y'all think? ~Karlie

A much better excuse

2007-08-27T09:06:00.000-07:00

Maybe I should have waited a week on that flaky blogger post, 'cause obviously I wasn't ready to quit being flaky! Actually. we've just been REALLY busy. The boys started soccer, and my hubby's coaching. We had a huge barbecue with my husbands bank that was NOT a potluck because he told everyone that I would provide the food. So, I've been making cobblers and salads for 30. Then we took a fantastic weekend trip (just the two of us).

We went white water rafting and had a blast! The highlights were the EXTREME fun I had on the level 3 rapids, the great scenery, and the water fights we had with the other rafts. The downside, I ALMOST fell out (like hanging on with one arm)... not that it would be the end of the world, but the river is REALLY cold, and it just wasn't that fun. The other downside; we had a mega bimbo on the boat. I kept praying she would fall out, but no such luck.

We stayed at a great resort right on the river. I cheated on my diet (I'm down 12 pounds now... or at least I was before this weekend) and ate homemade ravioli, peanut butter pie, and Pina Coladas. We also ran into some old friends.

Between the trip, the barbecue, soccer, getting ready to start homeschool and a goodbye party, I've been too busy to blog, or visit blogs or clean my house. With that said, I start school next week, and I am again behind in laundry, so if I do spend time blogging this week, it's because I'm procrastinating my chores, which probably means, I'll be on here a lot. Procrastination is one of my gifts ( ; ~Karlie

Flaky Blogger

2007-08-21T19:38:00.000-07:00

Is there a flaky blogger award? My computer DIED, and I just got it back today... so there's my excuse!

8 Random Facts About My Marriage

2007-08-08T21:09:00.000-07:00

Rhen over at http://yestheyareallmine.wordpress.com/ tagged me with this interesting marriage meme (I still don't know what meme stands for). I'd never seen one like it, so I thought I'd give it a shot!

1. My husband and I met in high school. I was 15; he was 16.

2. We married right after high school graduation (but moved in together my Junior year)

3. My husband came from a very poor family, while mine was quite "comfortable". Interestingly, he has a far better work ethic than I do. I'm still expecting that silver platter.

4. We eloped in a 7th Day Adventist church (my husbands side of the family are Adventist), and the pastor said he wouldn't pronounce us man and wife unless we admitted to being sinners for having premarital sex. WHOA. I was NOT a Christian at the time, and let me tell you I was MAD! The naughty things I said about that pastor for the next few months... Honestly, even now that I've found the Lord, I still hate the guy.

5. My husband worked two jobs and put himself through college, while I had our first daughter... AND stayed home with her. I would only see him a few hours a week, but it has paid off. He has a great career and I am STILL home with my babies.

6. When I met my husband, he had long hair, and a nose ring! I had hair past my waist and wore hippie dresses (what can I say, it was a phase). I used words like Chronic and Humboldt, and was a BIG fan of Keasey (if ya know what I mean; if you don't GOOD for you).

7. We both found the Lord with the birth of our first daughter, and drastically changed for the better. We both share the same passions, God our kids, and each other.

8. Our marriage is strong, for many reasons; but I think the best part is that we both love to have fun. We are always taking little (and BIG) adventures. We laugh at EVERYTHING, and even after nearly 12 years of marriage, we still prank call each other. We both are a bit off our rocker, and that suits us just fine... he gets me.

Ah, now after writing this, I'm going to have to go love on my husband... I'm a lucky girl!

Now, who to tag? Really Nice Day is one cool chick... I'd love to hear about how she met her hubby http://www.reallyniceday.blogspot.com/ . Cindy is another one that I've never heard the "how we met" story. http://www.stillhisgirl.blogspot.com/ . Oh and let's throw in a guy blogger. Carl, an opinionated blogger I met over at HSB http://blog.larsonhomeschool.com/ And anyone else who wants to share. Javamamma and Rachelle have great stories.. I think I'll tag you both too while I'm at it!!! http://javamamma.blogspot.com/ ,http://3knightsandaprincess.blogspot.com/

BTW, would someone PLEASE tell me how to do the link thingy!

Clearing Off The Path

2007-08-07T14:35:00.000-07:00

Today I heard God. I've had a bit of a dry spell lately with the Spirit. Sure, I heard the bit about homeschool, but it was more of God speaking through others to me than me actually talking to the Big Guy. Sometimes he's gotta do it that way because of my thickheadedness.

Oh, but this morning while I was in prayer, I pressed in to the spirit, and ... I met with a friend I haven't visited with in awhile! It was like old times. Sure we've "corresponded"; but today, I "hung out" with my father!
I just had to share something he told me! So, as I was in prayer, I was asking him where he had been; why do I labor over certain prayers for so long with no answer; only confusion? Why couldn't I communicate with him like I used to? As I prayed this I felt prompted to call out "Teach me your way Oh Lord" Psalm 27:11 .

This is where I saw a vision (non Charismatics might want to bolt about now) and I saw myself walking along a path. I heard God whisper " this is the path to righteousness, the path to God." I couldn't walk forward because the entire path was littered with books, for as far as I could see. I had to sweep the books off the path, then hand them over to God. As I looked down at the books I saw they were all my Christian "self help" books. Books on parenting, dieting, prayer, marriage, you name it. And then it clicked. I have been turning to these books for the answer, NOT God. I have been reading someone else's interpretation of God's word, and not going directly to the source.

While many of these books were obviously written by an anointed author, they were not intended to take the place of God's word. Many of the books conflicted each other, and even more of them conflicted God's word; yet I'd read them far more than I pressed into prayer. These books were blocking my communication with God.

So, it's time to lay the books aside. Bring out my old trusty bible. Dig out my favorite worship Cd's, and spend some time in the presence of my God. Ah, it's good to be back where I belong.

Our School Decision

2007-08-04T17:37:00.000-07:00

Well, we've made our decision as to what we are going to do about the kids schooling next year.
We spent a good portion of the Summer praying for God's direction, and heard nothing. It was so frustrating. About half way through July, we hesitantly decided to put the kids back in school. I guess we were getting a bit tired of waiting on God. We were so unclear about our direction that we figured it would be easier to pull them out half way through the year than put them back in.
I told my friends, my family, the kids. I was even about to tell my blogger friends when I finally heard from God. I guess we should have waited because God had a different plan. We felt God told us that we were indeed to homeschool, and he sent two BIG confirmations following his word.
So there you have it. Wanting to follow God's will, we will be homeschooling next year.
Now for the confession part. I was REALLY looking forward to putting them in school. I know my kids were only in PS 6 weeks, but my house became so much cleaner, finding time to exercise was so much easier. I didn't feel like I was always running around trying to get everything done because my little mess makers were gone. I could get my hair done, go out for lunch with my husband, meet a friend for coffee. Oh, and I had uninterrupted quiet time; that was so nice.
On the flip side, while the kids were gone, I might have been off duty, but so much more was required of me during their home time. School is definitely a battlefield, and we must pray, equip, pray, talk, and pray in order to make it through. I've met some awesome Christian parents who DO make it work, but I don't doubt for a second their increased prayer labor. I have so much more respect for these families and for their children; they choose to follow God rather than the world that is literally bombarding them 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. It takes a special child, and the Holy Spirit. To try to make it through with out God's blessing, well, that isn't something I'm willing to gamble with; no matter how badly I want a spotless house and some alone time.
Now, the battle is changing my attitude. I'm finding it difficult to get excited about curriculum. I went to a homeschool support group planning meeting and just sat there and didn't say a word (those who know me, know that defies who I am.... I'm a talker, with lots of ideas, who won't shut up unless bribed with dessert ( and that's only while I'm swallowing). I just sat there thinking "I so don't want to be here". I don't want to purchase curriculum, I don't want to clean my house, I don't want to be a part of the homeschool group. Do ya think I'm pouting? I think I'm going to add "being a big baby" to my hobbies list on my profile. I even cried to my husband the other day " You know this is a huge sacrifice, 'cause the house will never be clean again (sob), and I'm gonna get SO fat (sob), and I'll have no friends (sniff), and I gonna buy flowery jumpers and shirts with doily collars (WAHHH)" this is where I fall onto the bed and bawl and my husband asks me if it's that time of month. I did however get a non consequential back rub out of it.
I finally snapped out of my mini depression enough to get the house moderately clean again, and I pulled down my huge Rainbow Resource catalog; and ripped it up and burned it! Kidding, only kidding. I haven't opened it yet, but it's on the table ( I'm taking baby steps). I am praying that God continues to soften my heart, and equip me to accomplish what I need too, regardless of my emotions.

10 Things You Can Say To Your Husband.....

2007-08-02T07:41:00.000-07:00

Have you ever noticed that there are some thing's that you can say to your husband, that he could never say to you. Things that would cause you to freak out, have a teary fit, and unless you are an amazingly mature woman (which I am not) cut off sex for the week. Luckily I have a remarkable (and smart) husband, and not a single one of these phrases has ever been uttered to me (and lucky for him too; ha ha). I can not however claim the same honorable behavior. While most of these things have not been said to him, I must admit to a few, #s 1, 8, and 10 more than once). No wonder his nickname for me is Evil Wife (said in love of course… I hope).

10 Things You Can Say To Your Husband, But He Better NOT Say To You

1.Oh, look at your cute belly; have you been eating extra snacks lately?

2.Maybe we should wax your butt hair.

3.Ew, you need to shave your prickly whiskers

4.Time to get new pants; can you even breathe in those?

5.I think hair loss makes you look more mature.

6.Whew, how long are you going to be in there... Smells like something died?

7.Want me to tweeze your nose hair for you?

8.You take those dirty clothes off before you come in this house!

9.You just don’t clean it right.

10.I’m too tired, maybe tomorrow night

BTW... I finally cleaned my house. It took 4 hours of hard core manual labor to get it looking like normal. Whew, I think I'll keep to the everyday maintenance from here on out.

Housewife Angst

2007-07-30T18:06:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had one of those days... or weeks where you just couldn't get motivated to clean? I keep finding "better things to do" like blogging or reading, or talking on the phone (which I am quite good at... ask Nsremom, she'll vouch for my long winded conversations).
Day one of procrastination wasn't that big of a deal. Day three I could start to see the laundry pile up..... day six, well... I'm praying that we don't get any unexpected visitors, if ya know what I mean.
Besides cleaning the kitchen, clearing the toys out of the living room, and sporadic bed making, I've done nothing. No laundry, no dusting, no kid room declutter. NOTHING!
Now that the task is so daunting, I find my motivation lacking. I'm actually thinking of changing my ways from "semi tidy" housewife, to all and out slob. Maybe I'll start watching Days of Our Lives, and pork up on Bon Bons. Oh but the little voice inside my head says "you WANT to bless you family with a clean house and warm meals, and you don't even like Bon Bons, and ever since I turned 16 (yeah pre Bo and Hope days), the show has really lost it's appeal! "
I'd really like a maid, but hey, it's not going to happen. I NEED motivational tips! I haven't been in a cleaning rut like this since my last baby was born. As most of you know, cleaning house doesn't bring a lot of recognition. I don't often hear, "wow honey, that toilet sparkles" or "gee golly, look how dust free the china hutch is!" or "hey mom, thanks for removing all the McDonald's toys from my toy box." Nope. I guess I'm feeling a bit under appreciated.
Well, I'm off to go stare at the laundry. Maybe I'll get some divine motivation and actually start a load.