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Saturday, August 4, 2007

Our School Decision

Well, we've made our decision as to what we are going to do about the kids schooling next year.
We spent a good portion of the Summer praying for God's direction, and heard nothing. It was so frustrating. About half way through July, we hesitantly decided to put the kids back in school. I guess we were getting a bit tired of waiting on God. We were so unclear about our direction that we figured it would be easier to pull them out half way through the year than put them back in.
I told my friends, my family, the kids. I was even about to tell my blogger friends when I finally heard from God. I guess we should have waited because God had a different plan. We felt God told us that we were indeed to homeschool, and he sent two BIG confirmations following his word.
So there you have it. Wanting to follow God's will, we will be homeschooling next year.
Now for the confession part. I was REALLY looking forward to putting them in school. I know my kids were only in PS 6 weeks, but my house became so much cleaner, finding time to exercise was so much easier. I didn't feel like I was always running around trying to get everything done because my little mess makers were gone. I could get my hair done, go out for lunch with my husband, meet a friend for coffee. Oh, and I had uninterrupted quiet time; that was so nice.
On the flip side, while the kids were gone, I might have been off duty, but so much more was required of me during their home time. School is definitely a battlefield, and we must pray, equip, pray, talk, and pray in order to make it through. I've met some awesome Christian parents who DO make it work, but I don't doubt for a second their increased prayer labor. I have so much more respect for these families and for their children; they choose to follow God rather than the world that is literally bombarding them 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. It takes a special child, and the Holy Spirit. To try to make it through with out God's blessing, well, that isn't something I'm willing to gamble with; no matter how badly I want a spotless house and some alone time.
Now, the battle is changing my attitude. I'm finding it difficult to get excited about curriculum. I went to a homeschool support group planning meeting and just sat there and didn't say a word (those who know me, know that defies who I am.... I'm a talker, with lots of ideas, who won't shut up unless bribed with dessert ( and that's only while I'm swallowing). I just sat there thinking "I so don't want to be here". I don't want to purchase curriculum, I don't want to clean my house, I don't want to be a part of the homeschool group. Do ya think I'm pouting? I think I'm going to add "being a big baby" to my hobbies list on my profile. I even cried to my husband the other day " You know this is a huge sacrifice, 'cause the house will never be clean again (sob), and I'm gonna get SO fat (sob), and I'll have no friends (sniff), and I gonna buy flowery jumpers and shirts with doily collars (WAHHH)" this is where I fall onto the bed and bawl and my husband asks me if it's that time of month. I did however get a non consequential back rub out of it.
I finally snapped out of my mini depression enough to get the house moderately clean again, and I pulled down my huge Rainbow Resource catalog; and ripped it up and burned it! Kidding, only kidding. I haven't opened it yet, but it's on the table ( I'm taking baby steps). I am praying that God continues to soften my heart, and equip me to accomplish what I need too, regardless of my emotions.

28 comments:

ConservaChick said...

Yes, I did read your link. In fact, if I knew how to do the whole link thing; I'd put it at the end of this post. If you want to know the truth Emily, I honestly beleive the reason God had me go through the whole PS thing was because I was thinking like a pharisee (just like in the article). WOW, did he open MY eyes. God is not just in homeschool.. he is wherever we are called, and YES, that can be public school... I've seen it with my own eyes. I am no longer afraid of the school system, because God has once again proved to me that he is indeed bigger than EVERYTHING! Oh, and the bobble head comment was great, you amuse me too.

ConservaChick said...

Oh, even though I can't figure out the link thingy, you can read the article we are talking about by copy and pasting this:
http://www.crosswalk.com/1196129/

One of these days my computer skills will catch up with the rest of you... I just know it (;

javamamma said...

Obedience is the key, my friend. Praying for a huge dousing of grace for ya for this next school year.

I'll think of you when I'm sitting around eating bonbons and watching soaps while my 2 older ones are at school all day and my little one's at preschool 3 days a week.

Kidding, kidding. :o) Actually I'll be on my knees praying for revival in my kids' school...well not 7 hours a day but, ya know...

ConservaChick said...

Javamamma,
You are evil! No really, you are so lucky you don't live near me. I'd drop off all 4 of my kids at your house once a week for my "spa day". ~Karlie

Cindy-Still His Girl said...

Curriculum Schmiculum. Who needs it? ;) You'll find what you need when you need it.

I've appreciated your encouragement to me in this area. Now that you are totally bailing on me, however, I'll have to find new friends. I'll keep you around for times you might come in handy, though.

God will bless your obedience to His calling with things even greater than a clean house.

ConservaChick said...

Ha Ha Cindy, and you can take my kids when Javamamma doesn't have them. Hey, I didn't totally bail on you; at least I'm super supportive and understanding of your decision. I may still be good for something yet! LOL!

Gayle said...

Don't sweat the curriculum thing. I'm with Em and Cindy. Just take it easy. Do a free-flow year and relax. If you push hard, and get all academically strict, your going to have a harder time following God's direction in this.

And what's wrong with school four days a week and then swapping your kids with another mom one day a week? Then you can have one day all to yourself. You know, to clean, watch soaps, eat bon-bons...stuff like that.

Chelle said...

I hear you on your lack of motivation. I'm kind of feeling the same way. "But I don't want to go back to school!!!!"...except it's me saying it and not the kids. On the other hand, we're totally changing our homeschool approach this year, so maybe that will help me change my attitude. :-) Praying for you, friend.

Here's to hip,homeschooling mama's!

Nan said...

Hang in there! I think I have this battle every Summer but deep down I know what it is that I must do. As you know, there are days that I love it and days that it's awful. I suppose a public school teacher feels that way about her job too!

I can't even imagine the kind of free time you speak of... probably better if I don't experience or I might never give it up.

Kimmie said...

Hi Karlie;

Wanted to let you know that this year we are again homeschooling...year 11 (wow, even I am amazed ;-)

HOWEVER, this will be the first year that God has released us to "family school" which is my way of dealing with the fact that really we will be unschooling, but I don't like the word (sorry for those of you who do...but a negative in front of a postive...is just wrong to me)...so feel free to tag along...I am planning on walking in the woods, reading aloud, doing lots of lap books (unit studies)...and really all this may be even more than what the Lord has told me...

last year was a BEAR with foster care (adopting the 3 wee ones in March...adding them in right as public school started for them)...preschool, social workers...and trying to homeschool-God (and my Knight) say enjoy a year of 'whereever' I lead you.

Hope I don't mess it up- want to enjoy the freedom while I have it ;-)

praying for you my friend

Kimmie
mama to 6
one homemade and 5 adopted

ConservaChick said...

Gayle, Since your a bit closer than Javamamma and Cindy, are you volunteering to take my kids for my bon bon binge? Or you could just drive up here and we can send the kids outside while we eat bon bons together and call it unschool!

Rachelle, I want to hear all about the hs approach change!

Nan, Yes, a taste of freedom and it's all over.

Kimmie, 11 years!!! You are awesome. Some people can make "unschool" work. I on the other hand might have issues (see my message to gayle above). Some of the coolest kids I've met have been unschooled, but their parents have it instinctively together. I am sadly... not there.

EEEEMommy said...

Not that it's all that encouraging now, but years from now when the kids are grown and gone you'll have plenty of time to clean your house and no one to mess it up, and then you'll miss the mess, well maybe not, but you'll miss the mess-makers. It's all about perspective.
This year, I'm determined to organize my own little mess-makers. With no more toddlers, I figure the 5 of us ought to be able to maintain some degree of cleanliness together. I'm developing a plan that I hope will work, if it does, I'll blog about it.
Beyond that, be encouraged by a verse I read this morning from II Corinthians 3, "not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God."

Even those of us who are most passionate about homeschooling have days where we dread it. You are certainly not alone!

Praying that He'll give you JOY! He will certainly bless your obedience.

EEEEMommy said...

P.S. I only had one jumper, and I got rid of it a few years ago. :) I had to laugh though about the doily collars, my mom used to make those when I was homeschooled. She's so much more chic now. :)

reallyniceday said...

Now I was thinking more along the "pink denim" jumper with side pony tail and homemade earrings. You could also raise hermit crabs and rabbits.

Not that those things are intrinsically evil but bunched together and assimilated by one such people group is a little frightening... :)

No, I pray your year goes great. Obedience is better than sacrifice and hey, you're doing both. Whatta deal! That means homemade bon bons! :)

Gayle @ thewestiecrew said...

I haven't read any of the other comments yet, but I can tell you that I would be hard-pressed to believe that there was any hs'ing mom that hasn't been there-done that (if they haven't--then they will).
I am right there with you in the boat right now girl. I haven't ordered the first thing, and I don't have the motivation to do so, either. Worst part about that is that I am the stupid support group leader. Oh well...here's some support..."this is reality!" Right?!..LOL!
Hang in there, hon...God will give us all that we need, including the gumption to git er done.

ConservaChick said...

Eeemommy, YES, I want to hear all about your cleaning plan! Hope it works, so I can copy you!

Reallyniceday, Pink jumpers, scary. Homemade bon bons, I don't know about that. It defeats the purpose of leisure following those nasty little snacks, but it WOULD be very homeschooly of me, wouldn't it (;

Gayle, I'm glad to hear I'm not alone in lacking motivation. Oh and from the leader of a support group! Hey, I'm signed up to head publicity. HA! Secretly I only agreed so that I might diversify the group a bit. I'm getting tired of being the only mom in make up and jeans.

Karen Hossink said...

Just one question. Did you hit dh when he asked if it was "that time of the month"??? LOL

Anonymous said...

I am so proud of you! You come across strong and I know God will give you everything you need.
When we started years ago I was so nervous but after only a couple weeks I relaxed. Just remember not to let homeschooling take over everything!!! Here is a link to a wonderful lady's site that really helped me out. http://www.thefamilyhomestead.com/ I know plenty people probably say this to ya but I am here if you ever just want to talk!
All for His glory, ~Rhen

ConservaChick said...

Irritable Mother, Yes... but I beat my husband regularly (kidding)

Rhen, Oh, you are so sweet! Nervous? No. Lazy and unmotivated? Yes. Should I really admit these things???

Anonymous said...

Great catching up with your blog. Wow, lots changing. So are you keeping them in school the rest of the year? Or starting back with HS this fall?

Mrs. Darling said...

Oh you poor thing! Well this I know; if God has called you He will equip you!

I know it makes the days long and arduous but having already raised one to adulthood I can testify to how fast these years fly by.

All too soon you will be able to go out to lunch again and be kid free.

I had to laugh at the wearing jumpers and shirts with doily collars! It might comfort you to know I dont own one jumper! Or one doily collar! LOL

Anonymous said...

"We felt God told us that we were indeed to homeschool, and he sent two BIG confirmations following his word."

I may have missed it in the post, but would you mind sharing the two BIG confirmations that helped you in your decision?

I pray that the Lord would bless you and your family.

Carl

ConservaChick said...

Christa,
No, they will not go back this Fall.


Mrs. Darling,
Not even ONE jumper???? Even I have one (but I'm saving the doily collars for when I start making my homemade bonbons!).

Carl,
I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.
No really, it would take an entire post to get into it. With God, there's always lots of detail (he has yet to send me the simple e-mail that I often request) I'll save it for another day when I'm feeling quite wordy!

EE said...

Kudos for listening to God on this one!

Melissa Stover said...

congratulations! and haha you make me laugh with all the denim jumper talk. hahahahaha.

take it slow on the curriculum. you know you can just read some library books for a while till you decide.

baby steps are good.

Anonymous said...

You know, we could trade kids. I'll take yours for a day, you take mine for a day. It'd be a fair trade, 4 for 4, which is hard for me to find. I never feel right about dumping my 4 kids on someone, then taking their 2 for a day... :-) I AM in the Pacific Northwest...but how far are you from Central Oregon??

I'm actually off to a little store in Bend this morning. It's a second hand kids store, but they also have a library section full of "used" curriculum. I'm pretty good at scrapping stuff together - a little of this, a little of that. And I can't afford the brand new packaged curriculum with the hefty price tag anyway.

Blessings to you on this adventure!!!

Halfmoon Girl said...

Well, I so appreciate your honesty here. I think I am still in mourning two years later for some of the things that you give up as a hs mom. I was so looking forward to exercising, morning bible study, time with the little ones... I know, as you do, all the good stuff about homeschooling, but I like to hear that someone else finds it difficult to be obedient sometimes. Thanks for this post. I will pray for you.

Anonymous said...

I was feeling the same way though I have never had my children in public school. You can read my latest blog at www.homeschoolblogger.com/mom2zjh
There is an AWESOME article in The Old Schoolhouse this month titled "I was raised by Wolves" WOW!!! What an eye opener!
Love your blogs btw!
~Holly